


Moonlight

by WinterIsobel



Series: Breathless [3]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Angst, Creta, Dancing, Established Relationship, F/M, Family Drama, First Dates, Fluff, Fort Briggs, Haruko is a good person, Letters from Xing, Lucid Dreaming, M/M, Madam has secrets, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Roy is royalty, Roy's family, Royalty, Secret Relationship, Separations, Soul Bond, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Top Ed, Xerxes alchemy, breakdown - Freeform, not too much though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-02
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2018-12-23 02:22:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 52,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11980068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterIsobel/pseuds/WinterIsobel
Summary: Roy is one step from the top, with Edward by his side.The world decides to mess up with them.And they end up messing up with its rules.[From Ch11] '“Why there are no files about my parents, or their families?! About their accident.”Edward can’t do much more than watching at the scene. Roy lied. He's never stopped longing for them.He just pushed it all down because he was a good person and now it was all coming back doubled and it was dreadful. A hole at the center of his and Edward’s chests.





	1. Chapter 1

_" We are her today to honour the actions of a good man who distinguished himself both in war and peace. He proved himself a fine warrior in our darkest hour and a forward-thinking administrator during the aftermath of.. "_

The ceremonial flags flutter in the warm wind announcing the upcoming summer. The sun is already setting, but the temperature is agreeable despite the late hour in the afternoon. All around the air is filled with the perfume of lindens. Still, the favourable weather alone cannot explain the unbelievable crowd of people who came to assist to the public event. They are filling the open space in front of the Headquarters and the outer square, in addition to the surrounding streets. An unexampled event.

_"..whose help has been crucial in the upgoing rebuilding of the Ishvalan communities as much as.."_

Someone is tugging Edward's sleeve.

" Where is uncle Roy? " Elicia asks excited, as she looks tiptoe over the parapet. He lowers and points in the direction of the main patio, where the Fuhrer is speaking.

" The seats behind the Fuhrer, the third man on the right. You see? "

" Yeah! "

And there is Roy. If it wasn't for the special bond they share, Edward would have fell into the illusion everyone fell into. The man on the stage looks calm, self-confident. He is wearing his ceremony uniform. Deep blue, with silver garments and gold metals on his chest. 

Instead, Edward can feel all the nervousness rushing through him. It is the strangest thing ever. Realizing it is not you and still being a part of how you are feeling.

On the other side, Roy is probably aware of the excitement and proudness pervading him right now. Not that he didn't provide to express himself in a far more tangible way during the last weeks.

" Maes would have been so proud" Gracia whispers, moved.

" I am sure he is" Edward smiles at her and looks back to the stage.

_"_ _..to us. Colonel Roy Mustang, take a step ahead."_

And Roy does. By reflex, Edward can't help but grasping his flesh arm through the fabric of his jacket, right where - only a few trusted people know- his mark is.

Roy hazards a rapid glance over in their direction and tries to not smile. He steps in front of the Fuhrer and other two generals, not without a certain elegance.

_"It is my honour to promote you to the grade of General of Amestris. Be a general means to serve the good of the nation. To give people hope when it seems lost. To protect them. Always live up to these principles."_

A brand new star takes its place on Roy's shoulders as an outstanding ovation drowning out the noise of Central City and travelling through the streets as a raising wave.

Roy's composure finally breaks into a genuine smile as the Fuhrer and the other generals offer him their congratulations. He turns to face the crowd, which doubles in the effort to make the earth tremble with their feet. He bows a several number of times, his hand anchored to the arm, looking forward to reaching Edward in some way.

"Are we going to the party now? " Elicia immediately asks over the noise, causing both Gracia and Edward to laugh.

"That's tonight, we still have a little time", Gracia explains as they stand up from their seats.

"Oh", she lets out, clearly disappointed.

" What if we play to 'Find uncle Havoc'in the while? " Edward grins exaggeratedly. Before the celebration began, he spotted the group a few rows away from where they are.

"Yeeeah!"

She speeds through the other soldiers attending the ceremony without waiting for them.

Edward looks back to the stage, where Roy is still busy shaking hands and stuff. They are going to see each other at the party. And he already promised Roy a unforgettable after-party, so he needs to be patient and wait.

Roy made himself clear several times. There was no reason to believe their coming out as a couple would have a negative effect on his career. He also made it clear he wouldn't care even if it would. But Edward couldn't let it happen. They had several discussion on the matter.

The truth is that none of them is able to understand what could await them if they decide to do it. Moreover, in the aftermaths of what happened to them, they decided to avoid unwanted attentions. That's why in the end they decided on keeping it a secret, at least for the moment. Even if what he did wasn't exactly human transmutation..dealng with souls was a too delicate matter. Alphonse had been studying Xerxenian legends for a while now and despite his many update, there is still a lot they don't understand.

Most of all, he doesn't want to sabotage Roy's chance to do something good because of his own wishes. 

All of sudden, a part of him wonders if one day he will ever be able to stand by Roy's side as something more than a partner. He sees Haruko's wife to step ahead and shake Roy's hand as she hugs her husband.

_Husband_

 

"Edward?"

 

Gracia's voice breaks the spell. He blinks and turns to look at her at light speed.

"You are blushing", Gracia knowingly whispers.

"Damned summer", he scoffs to hide his embarrassment.

"I think my daughter beat you. Again", Gracia laughs pointing at a group of people. Elicia is leading the way, hand in hand with Havoc and Riza. The others behind them.

" We found a charming little princess and decided to follow her" Havoc says.

"Edward, you look very charming yourself today", Riza greets him.

He is wearing a pair of kaki trousers and a velvet jacket, decorated in gold. Under it a white bottom down shirt. He tied up his hair in a low tail. The ribbon is made out of an old golden band.

"I guessed it'd be worth the occasion", Edward looks away a little shy. He might act like a wild wolf but his mother raised him right in fact of good etiquette.

"Indeed", Breda laughs. "He is the youngest colonel ever to be promoted."

" And you saw how many people came to see? " Falman adds cheerful.

" That's impressive", Gracia agrees.

"They also provided the event with a radio broadcast" Fury remarks.

"Are we going to the party now?" Elicia comes again.

"Well,- Edward knees and smiles at her - we can start going to the restaurant and you and uncle Havoc can help me to prepare everything. The best one wins my special surprise."

 

Elycia nods satisfied with the new plan and leads the way out, but Havoc, as usual, doesn't spare some teasing, because adds in a lower tone "Boss, I thought that was just for the G-" but Edward is faster and shuts him up with his flesh hand.

" Not another world ", he complains, "How is that I don't have anything to tease him back with?" he asks to no one in particular.

" _Oh_...but he _is_ dating someone ", Breda blathers, "He won't tell us who she is, though."

Havoc goes pale in a matter of seconds, shifting uncomfortably on his feet.

"Is that so? " Edward is already grinning evilly.

"Stop it now and we have a deal" Havoc says in a tone that declares utter defeat.

" Is it a serious thing then?" Fury asks sincere.

Havoc coughs nervously before admitting, "Yes, it really is. And now shut up."

 

 

When the Fuhrer communicated his intention to promote Roy to General, both Edward and Gracia insisted in planning what came out to be a giant party. After a little debate, they settled on a nearby restaurant for the location. It isn't far from their home and still it is big enough for the occasion. Edward spent the morning preparing everything. Little lights have been placed on the trees all around the tables, charged with an array he could reactivate with a simple transmutation. In fact, there were just little things to arrange before the first guests start arriving.

"Are the lights ok? Did I overdo?"

"No, it's very nice-"

"What about the music? Maybe we should ask for something more-"

Gracia stops him before he can make a further move.

"Everything is perfect and we have done a marvelous job. Everyone will talk about this party for the next months. Now.. " and he can hear Armstrong's voice over many others, at the restaurant entrance.

" ..go and have fun "

Thanks to the people coming through the doors, the place soon turns into the party they wished for. The music plays in the background while the chattering, the laughs and the voices become louder and louder with every minute. They are all coming in. Denny Brosh and Maria Ross, now pregnant with their first child. Sheszka and so many others from work. Major Armstrong. Some Ishvalan from the Rebuilt Committee. Doctor Knox.

After a few greetings, the chatters outside grow in volume as a car stops right outside.

" He's here " Havoc whispers in his ear, almost making him jump.

" Yeah. Ready? " Edward replies with a mischievous voice.

" I was born ready Boss. Let's go ".

 

Roy enters the restaurant under a cascade of clapping. Fury, unaware of what is going to happen, steps  ahead with his camera, ready to start immortalizing the evening.

"Sir, watch here please. "

And of course Roy would turn toward him and stop in the middle of the entrance hall. Just as planned.

Edward and Havoc went to hide behind two opposite columns on his sides. They look at each other waiting for the right moment.

"Stay still ", they hear Fury say.

And..

 

_Now!_

Roy is abruptly covered in confetti and feathers.

 

The flash goes off.

 

Perfect.

" What the.. " Roy manages to moufle under the paper rain.

He removes some confetti from his head. At least, he tries.

 

Everyone is laughing happily and cheering him up.

Edward steps ahead, his arms crossed and a smug smile on his face.

" _General_ , from now on there are going to be only papers and office work. Please, take a taste "

" How mindful of you, _Fullmetal_ " Roy smiles widely. "And feathers ". He takes a bunch of it in his hands and blows them away. "Who's courtesy are these? "

" Mine " Havoc answers, "Since you won't get any sleep from now on. Congratulations."

Certainly, the context makes this comment perfectly logic. Although, for the three of them, at least, it's another matter at all.

Roy can't help a snort as he shakes it all off the clothes. Well, most of it.

"Let's go, this way", Gracia suggestes to the guests.

" You are a dead man, Jean ", Edward hisses him when they are close enough not to be heard.

Havoc is about to reply when he receives a slap on his nape. Riza

" Ouch! " Havoc wipes.

 

 

Hours into the party, the tables used for the dinner become islands for friendly conversations and reunions among the guests. Children keep playing and running through them and someone improvised a karaoke contest. Luis seems the favorite.

 

 

Edward and Roy are watching some Ishvalan talking with Sheeska.

" It's nice that they came" Roy admits.

" Yeah. Are you happy? " Edward asks in a lower tone. He shifts on his chair to face Roy.

Roy looks him in the eyes for a moment.

" I..I am. It's just..until now this was..a goal I dreamed about. With my aunt, Maes. With you." He interlaces their hands together under the table. " Probably I just need time to realize it. "

" You need a day behind your brand new desk and you will regret not being a lazy colonel anymore. "

Roy laughs, "I knew you had the solution in your sleeve."

" Wanna know what else I have there? " Edward let himself murmur, since there is no one else in the proximity.

" Mhh, I should cut it and take a look" Roy murmurs back," but I am afraid we'll have to wait. The Fuhrer is here."

And Edward raises his eyes to see Haruko walking among the guests with his wife and briefly entertaining them with some chatting as he proceeds toward his newest general.

"Go", Edward suggests him. "Save him. It's your job now".

Edward himself get up and walks over to find Dr.Knox and Havoc smoking like if the Treasure Bureau had just announced an alarming increase of taxes on tobacco.

 

" Sir, Madame. thank you very much for joining us ". Roy shakes hands with Haruko.  

" Our pleasure, really ", she answers kindly.

" That's a marvellous party, I am happy to see so many of my men enjoy themselves out of duty for once. The place is very beautiful. Should I take you out on dinner here, shouldn't I? " Haruko asks to his wife, who nods

" Thank you. Would you like a drink? "

" I am sorry but I think I'll pass. Need to drive my lady back home. " His wife is looking at him with something Roy can't pin point out very well. But that's gone in a split of a second.

" None taken " he smiles back at the both of them.

" I'll go catching up with Mrs. Armstrong", his wife says, patting him on the arm. "Don't make me come looking for you. This gentleman deserves a night of celebrations."

" Of course", he intercepts her hand on its way down and stamp a brief kiss on it.

It's clear they love each other deeply. She steps away through the guests. Haruko brings his glance back on Roy, who doesn't lose his relaxed mask.

" May I steal you a few moments? I promise it won't take too long."

" Maybe somewhere quieter?" Roy suggests, unaware of the topic they are going to discuss.

" No need, this time. Let's just take a walk in the garden."

" After you."

 

 

" Where did you leave him?" Jean asks Edward, when he sees him coming closer to them.

" He's with Haruko".

" Edward, long time not seen ", Knox raises his glass as greeting. Edward nods in agreement.

" How are you, Doc? "

" Same as always. What about you? It has been months since you last came."

He is referring to the both of them. Himself and Roy. They have been checking the mark for a while after he got out of the hospital, but as months passed they came to the conclusion there was nothing to worry about and ended up cancelling those visits. If something changed, they could always ask to Doctor Knox for help.

" Everything is fine. Better." Edward shrugs.

Havoc is already making a face that means trouble. Edward thinks better.

" Jean, remember our deal? "

" Shit "

Knox looks between the two of them before declaring "I think I don't wanna know anything about it "

" You better" Havoc sights, disappointed.

" He was just being an as-". A sense of light uneasiness hits him, leaving him half way through his sentence.

" Edward? " Doctor Knox asks.

" Sorry, I just remembered..I have forgotten something..in the kitchen. I'll be right back."

He walks away from them and tries to focus on finding Roy.

That's mostly strange but, not knowing how, he immediately realize where he is. Entrance.

_One more thing to report to Al in the next letter._

In fact, he spots Roy where he sensed him. He is walking out Haruko and his wife. He hurries to reach him.

The Fuhrer's car is leaving.

 

" What.. "

But Roy is already turning back at him, having sensed him approaching.

" Not here " Roy murmurs, his facade still on. " Come with me ".

They sneak off unnoticed. Edward enters the cloakroom and Roy follows him, closing the door behind.

" What happened? ", the other immediately asks, a knot of worry in his chest.

" He came to congratulate once more and tell me to be in his office tomorrow, after lunch. "

" What for? "

" I don't know. Maybe he will tell me in tomorrow's debrief. Maybe not", Roy thinks out loud, letting his hands come to rest on Edward's hips.

Roy might have his suspicions but he is not going to share them with him for the moment. Not if this means making him worry. He knows it. And he knows that he knows. The bastard.

" And.. what are you doing? " Edward asks as the older man lowers to kiss his neck.

" This is supposed to be my party so.. I am unwrapping the present? " he explains quiet, moving his hands under Edward's shirt. Pulling him closer and breathing in his scent.

" Is that so? " Edward moans. " Your timing is just as bad as your ideas. If someone finds us here you will be remembered as the general who made out in the closet with another guy. The night of his promotion. "

" Not another guy", he corrects him smiling gently against his skin. "The man I love"

Edward surrenders on the last one and gives in to one kiss.

" Come on, Closet General. You have actual presents out there. And guests. "

Roy is looking at him with incredulous eyes.

" Did you just.."

" What? Name-coded you Closet General? Damn yes. "

 

They come back home later in the night, more drunk than sober. It seemed right to celebrate at their best. Roy laid down on the bed the second they entered the room, satisfied and exhausted. Edward entered the bathroom and thought better, deciding he might as well get a bath before heading for bed. He can count a few days as happy as this one, but he has no problems to admit a certain tiredness, with the emotions and all the preparations and cetera.

He quickly brushes his teeth while the water fills the bathtub and starts undressing.

" Where are you gone? " he hears Roy call for him.

" I am taking a bath. Take off the uniform, before you fell asleep. "

He lays down in the hot water. He hears Roy moving in the other room, deducing he has still some energies left to change into something more comfortable, after all.

He clearly missed the point, because the door slams open and Roy is now standing in front of him, his bare chest and just the trousers left.

And he is laying in the bathtub, wet and very, very naked.

" What are you doing? " he asks both embarrassed by the situation and amused by Roy's expression. His eyes are gloating.

" I am unwrapping my present. Finally. " He unbuttons his trousers and loses them on the floor. His movements are a little uncoordinated.

" You are drunk ". Edward laughs mildly. But he thinks better when Roy removes the last item of wearing in his possession. He can't help to lick his lips in anticipation.

He is not _that_ tired, all considered.

He probably voiced his latest thought because Roy's smile widens considerably.

"So are you." Roy replies, smug and confident.

"Possibly ". He has never liked alcohol that much, but it usually takes just a few glasses of wine.

Edward lays back in the bathtub, the picture of relax. In fact, every cell of his body is screaming. And Roy's are answering.

_Yours.Yours.Yours.Yours.Yours.Yours.Yours._

" So you don't mind if I join you, do you? "

And saying so Roy steps over the hedge of the bathtub and lays on the opposite site.

A god's body wrapped in foam and bubbles.

Edward considers him for a long moment, casting his eyes on every centimeter of skin he's able to see and carving silent love declarations on it. When eyes can't suffice anymore, he slids to make their chest line up and languidly kisses him on the mouth.

" I really don't".

Roy licks his bottom lip, while reaching the ribbon of Ed's ponytail and untying it. They fall on his shoulders, just for Roy to fill his hands with them as he makes their mouth melt together once again.

" _I thought so."_


	2. Chapter 2

The clock outside the Fuhrer’s office marks five o’clock by the time Roy makes it to his meeting with Haruko. Other than leaving later for work thanks to the other’s night celebrations, he spent the last few hours setting everything up after they all moved into the new office. Hawkeye has been adamant they should be operative within the next day and there was no way he could miss the unpacking.

No matter the stars on his shoulders. Or how appealing sounded the idea of spending the day in the bed with Ed.

“Come in”. He hears Haruko’s voice saying almost as soon as he knocks the door. The Fuhrer doesn’t raise his head straight away, and when it does, he looks at him from over his glasses with a confused glance.

“Mustang, has the hour come already?” he sights and twitches his eyes in a show of tiredness. He has marked eyeshadows today.

“Yes, I am afraid. Should we ..”

“..postpone? Of course not. Just. Sometimes it seems to be running out of time, isn’t it?” He closes the file he was examining. “Take a seat, please. We need to talk about your first assignment”.

“Yes, sir.” The afternoon light filters through the high windows behind Haruko, warming up the office with a pink shade.

“I know it’s been a few hours since you got your promotion, but I’m going to ask you a lot nevertheless. Fortunately, I understand you are up for the job.” A genuine grin lights up his face. Mustang nods, secretly excited and wondering what all the full is about.

 

 

Edward got up early as well and spent half a day in Investigation before making his way toward the laboratories. In fact, a few months ago, around the time Haruko told Mustang he was going to promote him to the rank of general, he received a new assignment as well.

The artefacts he was asked to look into months ago had finally arrived in Central City. Despite the suggestions he send by letter to the colleagues in the Far East, they got nothing done. Instead, there have been a few minor accidents during their first experiment. Edward wasn’t surprised at all when the Fuhrer decided to move the stuff in Central and asked him to take the lead along with another researcher, Philip Ruben, with the support of some specialist in antiquities. At first, the military thought about moving them by train, but in the end the fear of possible damages among the passengers if something were to go wrong made them evaluate to move them by car, using the countryside roads. Therefore, it took them longer to send it all. He is still working for the Investigation as well, but arranged with Haruko to split his work hours between laboratory and office work.

Now almost a month passed since Edward and the other colleagues from Central University received all the stuff and slowly started examining it. Among the various anthropologists and archeologists he met in these weeks, Edward ended up making friends with almost all of them, much for his surprise.

“Edward!” “Hello” “Hi!” Various people respond him, some of them already dealing with the files they are writing down, some of them occupied to wear the protective suits.

“Good morning, Edward” Edward turns around to look at the man who greeted him. Philip.

Philip was the one he ended up linking the most, almost because of their common interest in biological effects of alchemy. Philip was no alchemist and, as he made clear the first day they met, so his interests were purely academic. He took a doctorate in archeology with a specialization in biology and has been working as researcher for CU for almost two years now.

“Hi there. What’s up?”

Once, one of the other guys, Antonio, explained him that Philip was the prodigy of the department but unlike many before him, he was a simple and friendly person.

As for his , Philip didn’t make it a mistery about his whereabouts. He was adopted and grew up in the city, living in a quarter not distant from the Armstrong mansion. On the other hand, he turned out to be a very talkative person, and Edward found himself target of his many question about himself.

“The usual. Today we’ll be able to open and catalogue the last few boxes, I think. If you were here yesterday we would already be started” he winks.

“Yeah, sorry about that. There was my ex-CO promotion, so..”

“Big deal” Philip nodded thoughtful. “I read the papers. Important guy, isn’t it?”

Edward simply shrugs, the actual answer echoing in his head. _He’s gonna be the most important guy someday, so fuck yeah._

Philip goes ahead and starts wearing his suit, rapidly combing his massy brown hair with one hand. “Once we have finished, we can start to examine them. In other words, we can start playing.” “You worry me when you talk like this”. He shakes his head, trying to sound concerned. “Come on, you don’t foul me. You were thinking the same thing. Let’s go see what they’re pulling out”

In the beginning, Edward and the others decided to proceed by cataloguing every single item in detail before starting the true examination, in order to avoid incidents, as far as possible. They wear protective suits Edward himself modified with an array, which could protect all of them against strong heat and cold, since it seemed to be the problem, according to their colleagues in the east.

They take their own suits to wear when Edward feels Philip poking at his side. “Uh?” Philip is observing him.

“You should wear up your hair, Edward.” While saying so, he retrieves a single hair from Edwards jacket. He shakes his hand to throw it away and then stands with both hands in the pockets of the protective suit. “You are going to burn them, or worst. Contaminate the objects.”

“No one ever told you what a control freak you are.” He ties them up in a bun never the less. “You tell me. Everyday. Besides, wearing them up suits you.” Edward scowls. “Fuck off”

The others interrupt them, calling for help. They hurry up and get started. Edward needs to get every item through a series of arrays that examine the possible alchemic charge of each of them and determine which kind it belongs to. Said in other words, if a dagger is alchemically modified and how has been modified. For example, to burn whatever it touches. As far as they proceed, they have found out that almost of the objects were weapons but that only a part of them were modified with alchemy. According to the guys, by the look of them, they were at least decades old, so there should be not any upcoming riot to worry about.

They spend the morning cataloguing the remaining boxes. Although the last one turns out to be a surprise. “Oh? What do we have here?” Antonio voices in a stupefied tone as he removes the lid. The very last box contains a book along with other small objects and some kind of stone. It looks more like a giant sphere made out of agate. “Look, it is encarved.” One of the guys points out. “Is it alchemy Ed?”

Edward and Philip are dividing their attention between the book and the stone.

“Move it on the array. I’m going to check it.” Antonio carefully raises it from the box with engloved hands and lowers it on the table they use for examinations. “Take a step back, you all” Edward warns them as he claps his hands.

They do.

He touches the array.

He waits for any kind of reaction.

Nothing.

“Let me check again”. And he does.

The alchemy reaction goes off without any alarm. He frowns.

“It seems to be safe” Philip points out. “Yeah” Edward admits, sounding a little disappointed.

“Don’t be sad. You already have plenty of toys waiting for you. Check the book so we can call it the day.” The book is nothing more than a book. Everyone sights in relief.

“So, we’ve finally finished the first step of our research!” Philip announces excited. “From now on –and this second step will take months at least - we’ll split into three groups and we’ll deal with the objects themselves.” He calls everyone’s name and divides the m into three groups, each one dealing with the different boxes.

“What about you and me?” Edward points out when Philip stops talking. “We are going to deal with the most dangerous stuff. And assist all the groups whenever they need us.” Edward nods in agreement.

“Now go home. See you here tomorrow. Up. Up.” He claps his hands. Edward’s eyes go back to the book as everyone moves. The grey cover is a little damaged by time. It’s not difficult to imagine its original color, a deep black. ..

Philp’s voice intrudes his thoughts from far too close behind him. “Don’t worry. I’ll let you take a look once I have examined it” he prompts. Edward distances himself hoping not to look bothered. He is not that worried anymore by making contact with strangers, but it could be a while before he lets his guard completely down with pretty anyone except his brother and Roy.

“Fine. As far as you don’t melt it while examining it.” Philip pretends to be shocked, “I could never!” Then, in a smoother tone. “Do you have plans for tonight? Want to drink a beer?”. He retrieves his jacket from the desk. “I do, actually, but thank you.” Sort of. He promised Roy to catch up once he was finished. Not like they can go out on an actual date.

“Maybe another time then” Philip adds in a cheerful tone as he waves his hand on the way out of the labs. “Yeah. See you tomorrow”. Edward grabs his bag and follows.

 

 

Roy stands in front of the door of the new office already suspecting to find Edward in it.

“I like the colour of it”, he hears Edward’s voice from behind the door. Indeed. He steps in. “And we brought the couches and the desks” Roy contributes to the conversation, smiling at them all as he enters the room. Fuery is still dealing with the phone lines, but other than that it all seems in order. “It almost feels like the old office” Havoc says, rolling a cigarette in his right hand. “Apart from the fact that we are one floor away from Haruko and it is twice bigger.” Breda laughs openly.

“How was the meeting with the Fuhrer, sir?” Riza asks. Edward’s eyes run to meet Roy’s. “It went well, thank you.” He hands over a folder to her. “Take it and debrief them while I talk with Edward”.

Then Roy looks at Edward and moves his head toward the office. He moves to enter the inner office, Edward right behind him, while the others come back to work. “So..what’s up?” Edward immediately asks after closing the door, impatient as always. Roy’s glance shadows for a moment, before rubbing the back of his neck. That’s what he does when he is tired. Edward figured that out long before they become intimate.

“I have good news and bad news. Which one first?” he sits against the hedge of the desk and crosses his arms. Edward huffs in quiet disappointment. “Bad, I guess?” “Haruko told me to be ready to join the general trainings in the North” “Whoa! That’s-”. Stupor leaves place to a deep frown.

“Wait a minute. If he’s gonna be there with Armstrong, old man Grumman and the other guys, why does he want you there too?” “He is not going.” “Why?” “He probably thought it wasn’t worth explaining. Maybe he just wants to put me on good use.”

“Mhmh. You should be happy, tough. It’s not so bad news after all.”

Roy grimaces. “I am due to leave tomorrow first in the morning.”

“What?! Oh, come on..” The younger man starts complaining and rolls his eyes, but Roy is already stepping closer and grabs his shoulder squeezing it gently. He is no more happy than Edward is about this. “I know. Which brings me to the good news. I am going to take off right now and you and I will have a proper date before I leave.” Edward relaxes a bit but his lips turn down never the less. Roy feels Edward’s tenderness at those words mixing up with guilt and the need to watch out for him.

“Roy, we can’t-“ “I know what you are going to say. Listen to me first – and puts a finger on his lips- I wouldn’t mind dining in the most exclusive restaurant of the city and showing you off. Still, I respect your opinion. So, I arranged a ..private date?” Edward’s eyebrows twitch.

“Trust me?” Edward gives in and nods. Roy raises his thumb.

“How long?”

He frowns, “Sorry?”

“How long is this exercitation thing ..?” “Ah.”

He pauses before continuing “A week, at least. More probably, ten days.”

_Too long_. Every cell of his body is warning him. They have never been apart since they got their marks and he doesn’t need a degree in soul bonding to understand that closeness can lay a major role in their daily life.

This time Roy is not sure is the worry he feels is just his own or Edward’s as well. “I’ll be back in no time” he hurries to say, trying to convince the both of them.

Edward stares a long moment before nodding again.

“So..this private date..is there food or ..” he decides to change the subject on purpose. Roy smiles fondly and grabs the coat from his seats before shoving him toward the door.

“Surprise”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *tiping from under a very cozy plaid, because plaids MATTER* 
> 
> I wrote the chapter with a song in mind. Listening it while reading this chapter might improve your realise of serotonin. The song is "Love me tender" by Presley.  
> Hope you're all doing fine. Happy October *****

It takes Edward a little by surprise when, after a quick drive, Roy pull off in front of his aunt’s pub.

“I thought you said date.”

Edward scowls at him when the other turns off the car. Roy rolls his eyes. “Trust me?” Edward imitates him, but follows never the less, interlacing their ends on the way in. Roy giggles at him.

Except.. the main door seems to be closed, the lights off. “What..”.

Roy sights. “Edward..” “Fine, fine.” Roy gently drags him on the back of the pub, where Edward finds out to be a second entrance. A sudden thought strikes him.

“Please, tell me they know we are here. Or is your aunt going to kill us?”

Roy laughs, a shiver of nervousness goes through him. “She knows and she is out of town. Don’t worry. The girls won’t be here either”.

Edward looks up at him while he messes about the lock. What should he be nervous about? It’s not like he is gonna be turned down or shit. Although, this is like a..first date, isn’t it? He sights. There is no fucking way he has butterfly in his stomach.

And of course the bastard knows. He opens the door and turns to cast him a glare so full of sappiness that he could drown in it. Moreover, he knows Edward far too well, because, instead of pointing out how they’re feeling, keeps it quiet and shows him in with a smile.

“You have already visited the pub. However, the building comprehends two sections. One is the pub. The other is used as a private house. Madam’s. I grew up here.” The rooms are narrower than Roy’s house, but somehow they are related on a deeper level. Edward can see how much the other man picked up from his previous home to furniture and decorate the new one.

“Do the girls live here too?” Edward asks as Roy shows him the apartment. “No, they do not. From time to time, she offers a place to stay to friends and former employees. The girls who can’t afford a rent in the city usually stay in the rooms above the pub.” He follows Roy down the narrow alley and into the kitchen.

Which brings to a cozy cloister. There is a low brick wall all around it and someone placed an exaggerated number of little candles all around the place. On the side next to the kitchen, they settled a table for dinner. A couple of slate steps connect the kitchen with the garden. Roy leads the way.

“I cut my chin on it when I was ten year old”, he points at the lower one. Then turns to look at Edward, who is still on the threshold looking at the candles, and his mind goes blank.

He fixes his eyes on the young man in front of him. The candles’ light shine on his skin as if they belonged there. Lately, his hair have grown even longer than before, reaching his backside if loose. And even if he hasn’t reach Roy’s height, he’s turned into a charming young man. Edward follows him in the garden. He pulls himself together.

“Not proper restaurant but..that’s the closest thing I could think of. No one is going to see. But if you want we can always go inside-” Edward has thought better and is smashing their mouth together. He holds a firm grip on his neck. When they break apart, he rest his forehead on Roy’s. “Just…just shut up.” He smiles.

 

They have dinner looking at the garden, talking lightly about work and other stuff, and silently deciding to ignore the fact that Roy is going to leave soon and that they won’t see each other for days.

“Where did you take all the stuff?”

“Well, the table and the candles, I managed with alchemy”, Roy explains while pouring some more white wine into their glasses, “The food, I might have asked for help to the girls.” “What did you have to promise back?” Edward laughs, taking a sip. “Nothing. They went mad the moment I said ‘a secret date’ and ..they took the upper hand”, Roy sights theatrically.

Edward doesn’t doubt the truth of the other’s words for a second. He met them all, in different occasions. At first, he had no idea if he should have been kinda jealous of the relationship they developed with the man he was now living with, but he had soon be proved wrong. They were like sisters – a bunch of them, actually- all caring about Roy’s well being and happiness, but nothing more. And seeing their boy finally falling for a beauty’s charms –Edward felt the need to go and dig his own grave that day- took them to a brand new level of insanity, for using Roy’s words. And it is Roy’s talking to bring him back from his thoughts.

“Were you saying?” “I was talking about how Eveline decided that cream candles were definitely better than red ones. She just brought this book about Xingan traditions about home décor, well being and stuff…But I think I chose the wrong wine if you are already ignoring me.” Edward throws him a piece of bread to make him shut up. Roy laughs back, takes it and slips it into his mouth.

“Thank you” Roy finally says after they finished their food and tidied up. “I wished to do something like this for quite a while now”. They ended up on an ottoman big enough for both of them. Edward’s traits softens in response.

“Me, too. It’s nice. The food, the candles and..yes, we already eat together, and sleep together-“ “We also do not-sleep together” Roy teases him.

“What I am trying to say” Edward deliberately decides to ignore him this time “is that it’s nice, doing it …on purpose. Spending time together on purpose.” He shakes his head and plays with the fork. “I’m not making any sense”.

“On the contrary” Roy’s hand comes to save the fork and takes its place in Edward’s. “It’s the whole point.”

They interlace their fingers engaging a silent fight for dominance. Edward raises his eyes, grinning at the man in front of him. Roy is looking at him with the tenderest glance he has ever seen. And, while in every other occasion he would feel obliged to put off a façade about not being mushy - really, it’s just embarrassment –, now his brain can’t cope with his fucking heart and there he is, looking at a hot, brilliant man who is in love with him so much that he would jeopardize the dream of his life for the sake of ..them.

He feels his heart melting just a little bit more every day.

Strange thing is it doesn’t hurt at all.

Giving up a part of your body for someone you love doesn’t always hurt.

Edward waits, convinced that Roy is about to say something else. Instead, the other man, after observing him for a long moment as well, gets up and invites him to stand up as well. He steps back inside and turns on a little radio. After a few changes of station, a waltz comes into ear.

He is wearing a cotton shirt, the jacket forgotten on the ottoman. “Will you make me the honour?” Roy raises his right hand as an invitation.

Edward stares at the other’s hand with a confuse glare. Well, maybe more worried than confused. “W-What?” Roy does not give in. He steps closer to Ed. “What? Don’t tell me..” “I don’t know how?”, the younger man glares at him. How is that this young brilliant man knows every secret in the universe but doesn’t know how to dance?

“Come on” He gently grabs Edward by his elbow, silently pleading, and after a moment of indecision the other man decides to give it a try. Roy helps him to put his hands where they are supposed to be and shows him.

“You take one step back. Than like this. Yeah, then two more step on place. Again..”

They try the basic movements for a couple of minutes, in silence. Than Edward looks up at him, his cheeks red with embarrassment.

“I can’t do this.” Why is his heart speeding like hell and why can’t he concentrate on these damn moves?

“But you are”. They are moving, even if out of time.

“And I’m gonna hurt you with my leg.”

“I’ll survive.” They continue, listening to the music without speaking.

Roy slowly makes him twirl around himself just to draw him back close. Their chests bumps into each other a little carelessly. “Sorry” Edward murmurs. “You don’t have to”.

More silence. Songs follow one another but neither of them suggest to stop.

Edward missteps and almost steps on Roy’s foot. Almost. “Well, we figured out there is something I definitely can’t do” he laughs nervously.

Roy lowers to murmur in his ear. “Edward, we have been dancing the whole time”

Edward distances himself –just a little- , shocked. “No fucking way, I’m just ..dangling” Roy’s laugh vibrates against his skin. He gets closer again. They are now dancing tete-a-tete.

And Edward would probably deny it with his last breath, but it’s kinda cool, after a while. Even if he is still not sure of what he is doing with his feet. The bastard repress what seems a light laugh, against his shoulder.

Sometimes having a bond saves you both time and words. On both sides.

“Don’t get used to it” he replies flatly.

“Actually, I have all intentions to” Roy declares quietly. “When I am Fuhrer, we’re going to host one ball after another”. Edward snorts at the words. Roy ignores him and keeps chatting while slowly dancing with him, “I’ll make you twirl on the floor and kiss you just for the sake of distracting you.”

“Moron” Edward can’t help a smile, despite his efforts.

His hand works his way to Roy’s neck and start massaging it as he speaks.

“You know..you can kiss the girl on first date. Nothing more though. You could make the wrong impression”

“Mhmh”

Roy’s left hand runs to cup Edward’s cheek.

Their lips are millimeters apart but he decides to engage for a little longer, just for the sake of savouring the moment. Their nose brushes against each other one way. Then the other. His right hand lowered down to pull the other closer. Edward leans forward, eager of being reclaimed.

And he does.

 

 

The steam of the engine warming up seems willing to draw a courtain between them and the soldiers loading up the carriages. Unfortunately, a thin one, Edward thinks.

Instead he keeps talking. “Please say hi to General Armstrong..” Roy sights at the thought. “-and tell her to not go soft on you.”

“Please don’t do anything stupid until I’m back” Roy scowl at him.

“Stupid is what I do” Edward is trying very hard but his smile fades, just a little. He would lie if he said his mood isn’t a shit. Roy must feel him way too well because he lies a little closer and puts a gloved hand on his shoulder, his thumb silently brushing his neck.

“Seriously” he adds in a worried voice, “Are you gonna be ok? Promise me.”

“Yeah. Don’t worry.” Edward shrugs and tries harder. “Now go. The train won’t wait. I’ll see you here in a week” he puts on his best face.

He knows he can’t fool Roy, not completely. The mark hasn’t got anything to do with it. Roy can read him as easily as a book. Even when he was younger.

“In a week” Roy repeats, pulling back his hand, brushing it down Edward’s arm, on purpose. He looks a little strained. He takes his luggage.

The men of his security detail are already on it, waiting for him. He turns back and with a couple of steps he jumps on the train, which starts leaving almost immediately.

They glance at each other through the window as the train leaves.

Roy keeps his eyes fixed on Edward as long as he can.

It’s just a moment, then he is gone.

 

Roy stays where he is until the train exits Central City.

It’s going to be the longest week of his life.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hi Al,_

_I received your letter so thank you. I’m happy that everything is fine. Did Ling actually bring you in a brotel? IS he insane? Tell him I’m gonna punch him in the face, emperor or not. If May didn’t do it already. (She did, didn’t she?)_

_I have no idea of what gyaozi are supposed to be alike but if they are good the half of what you are saying, I wanna try them as soon as I can._  
_Now. The promotion was pretty fucking amazing. There were people all over the streets. Party was a big success. We missed you. Fuery took a bunch of photos. I am sending you a couple with this. Haruko came, too._

_Speaking of, he asked Roy to leave for the trainings in the North. Which is amazing. Isn’t it? Just, he will be gone for like a week, maybe more. So, I’ll be waiting, I guess._

_About what you wrote in your last letter. Don’t go through every piece of paper in the damn library. It seems to me from what you say that rather than shortage of materials, the problem is the opposite. So far we know how it is supposed to feel like, how it looks (we really didn’t need a description for that, though). You suggested in your last letter that what Lokan said about sharing more than just a few feelings might be true but you didn’t explain. Is that something you are reading? What about it? It’s just that the other night at the party I think I was able to find Roy on the other side of the building by sense. Other than that, yeah, it seems our bond is growing stronger. And yes, I’ll keep you updated about anything. You don’t have to worry about it, Al. We feel just fine and there were no problems since we got them._

_Please, try to leisure yourself a bit, other than researching in the library (just NOT with Ling, for God’s sake!)._  
_Work is fine. Philip is driving me crazy over security protocols. Yesterday we finished opening the boxes. (No more weapons. Small beans)._

 

Edward reads the letter a second time, checking if there is something else Al might need to know.  
Like the fact that he is feeling like shit since the moment he saw Roy leaving by train. Or that he will be in a terrible mood for days, being insufferable and shit.

Or that, since a few weeks, he has been experiencing something else. Something he can’t quite explain himself. The first time was the night immediately after Roy found out he was going to be promoted. He was dreaming about something but the moment he woke up he couldn’t remember what it was about. However, it left him with a sensation of euphoria and yearn at the same time, as if he was about to reach something. Roy didn’t mention anything similar so it had to be just him. It happened another couple of times. Probably it is just tiredness.

Nope, he thinks, better not to tell Al about these things.

He adds a few recommendations and sigils the letter with alchemy. Al would have been the only one able to open it. If not, the letter would destroy itself. He will mail it later.

He is not going to work in the Labs until Friday, which is pretty ok. He doesn’t think he can manage Philip’s bursting mood and his own mood at the same time. Some good old –and probably boring- hours spent in the office will maybe do the spell.

 

The day pass so slowly it seems a never ending odyssey. But he promised he would be ok, so he puts himself together and once he gets home starts cooking something decent and after that he takes a shower and goes straight to sleep.

The bed feels strangely empty after having spent months sharing.

He would like to say goodnight, as he usually does.

Instead, all he can think of is a whispered reminder. “One week”

 

Edward wakes up at the sound of a car passing by down the street. He spent most of the night jumping from a dream to another, each one too crazy to remember them by morning. It left him tired enough to sleep over his usual wake time.

“Fuck” he cursed in a sleepy voice.

Free morning.

Eventually he gets up and after a quick breakfast decides to keep himself busy with laundry and stuff. Housework doesn’t bother him nor Roy but with all that happened during the last week, the preparation, the ceremony, they have been neglecting the house a bit. He starts from upstairs, bathroom and bedroom. He absolutely refuses to change the sheets and it has nothing to do with the fact that they smell just like _them_ and it would make him feel even very, very not ok to change them right away. _Nothing at all_. He loads the washing machine with a first basket of cloths.

Deciding to completely ignore the studio – seems a fight scene – until the weekend, he goes back downstairs. The kitchen does not require much work, and he seizes the opportunity to tidy up the sideboard and check in case he needed to buy something for the week.

He checks the clock. Lunchtime.  
He made plans to see Russel and go to that bookshop in Barbary Street. He might as well eat something on his way.

 

“Elric!” Russel is rushing through the busy pavement, his hand raised.  
Edward waves his own and approaches as well. The streets are swarming with people, probably thanks to the sales at the end of the season.

“You look like shit” the other man greets him. They side and starts walking toward their destination.

“I was waiting for another four minutes before punching you. I might reconsider”.

“Hold back, grumpy man.” Russel dodges an old woman in the while. “I’m just saying you look shittier than usual”.  
Edward raises one eyebrow, at which Russel burst into laughs. He decides to let it go. He smiles back at him and asks.

“How is your brother?”

 

They ended up spending almost the whole afternoon in the bookshop. He comes back with a few bags –the first time the owner was astonished, now he knows better – of books that go from mathematics to recipes and novels. Not his fault that he needs to keep his brain occupied. He places them in the studio before heading back in the living room.

He begins to tidy up what is left in order to finish everything. He also hangs out the laundry and brings inside some logs for the fireplace. The radio said a rapid change of weather is to be expected later in the week. Autumn is finally coming, it seems.

He is putting back in order the sofa and picks up one of the cushion. There is something lying between it and the seat.

It’s one of Roy’s hoodies. He left it here God knows when.  
It’s the one with the hole in the wristband.

The reality of his absence slams back at his face. Not like he would forget about it, but still.

If he were home, Edward would have mocked him for being a lazy bastard, always leaving things around in the house. He would have come home and showed him the books and..

Instead, Edward slowly crouches down on the sofa, with the hoodie in his hands.

And stays there, watching as the green of the garden outside the window gets richer, then darker.

When it gets colder, he puts the hoodie on and lets Roy’s scent cuddling him.

Then the sun sets and he sees nothing anymore, except for the reflection of the living room.

He probably should get up from here and make something for dinner.

 

He doesn’t.

 

 

_Driiiiiiiil_

 

The first ring of the phone makes him startle. It travels all through the silent house. He relaxes again, wrapping his arms against the cushion and burying his face in it. It can’t be Roy, he is still on his way to Briggs for sure.

It keeps ringing stubbornly.

“Whoever you are, I’m not moving from here.” He answers to no one.  
The phone scolds him by ringing vigorously.

“I said no.” He muffles against the pillow.  
One second. Two seconds. It keeps going.

Three. Four..

“Jeez, fine!! Comin’!”  
He gets up angrily, takes a couple of steps and picks up the phone.

 

“Hello?”  
“What’s with that voice?”

“Teacher!” She has the power to make him straight up from kilometers of distance.  
“How are you doing?”

“Still alive..and still waiting a call from you boys”. He leans against the wall and adjust his rebellious hair behind one ear.  
“Yeah about that.. Al..he is travelling at the moment so he couldn’t-“

“He coundn’t find a phone to call?” Teacher mocks him.

“As far as I know, there’s no telephone line running through the Great Desert”  
“Is he in Xing?” she asks back in a flat tone.

“Yep”  
“Well, I deduce you have a lot to tell me about the two of you if he is in Xing and I have to phone a military officer’s house to get to talk with you”.

 

_Shit_

 

  
“Yea-ah..” he drawls, lacking of purpose.

“What if you come down here and stay for the weekend?”

He straights back again. “What?! Are you serious?”

“I am” He can hear her smiling.

“Absolutely yes. Fuck, it seems ages since I last visited. I’ll let you know when I leave Central, ok?”  
“Don’t worry Ed. We’ll be waiting for you.”

 

It is safe to say, the next day it doesn’t get better. At the office nothing seems to go the right way and Edward finds himself pissed off and dealing with a giant headache. The guy he had to deal with wouldn’t understand a bit of legislations - or logic - even in a thousand years. He had to fix the whole mess thanks to him and ended up being too late for the cafeteria.

He took something while walking to the Labs. It turned out to be a rather unpleasant sandwich. Which he asked without cheese. Without results.  
Fortunately, thinking about the coming weekend in Dublith is keeping him from going crazy.

 

“Will you tell me what’s going on?” Philip murmurs through the table. They have been working for hours now. Edward is venting his stress on the bunch of pencil on the desk. He just broke the latest’s tip.

“I don’t know what you are talking about”.

“You could use a break. The pencils would appreciate, too”. Edward makes a face at him.  
"Or a vacation".

"I’m going to visit my alchemy teacher during the weekend, actually.” He keeps writing down his notes.  
“I see.” Philip stops instead, and crosses his arms, relaxing on the chair. “Where does she live? Back at your home?”

“Nah. Dublith. Closer”

“Mhmh. Good trip then. They say it is a nice place to seesight. Are you going with your girlfriend?”

“No, I am- _WHAt?!”_  
Edward has already started to answer back when Philip’s last words reach the inner cells of his brain.

“Come on. It’s clear as the sun that something is bothering you. Has she turned you down?” Philip leans forward a bit.

“I..there is no girlfriend-“ He tries to focus on the papers again, trying to be as chill as possible.

“Fine, boyfriend then”.

His head jerks up again and his eyes locks with Philip’s.

“That’s not what I was-“

“But I am right, aren’t I?”

 

“That’s none of your business, bio-boy”. He gets up to organize the folders and put some space between them. And hopefully, a stop to this conversation.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Philp gets up as well and gets closer, taking the chance to pour himself some coffee.

He takes a sip and lets Edward finish.

“Soo..did you two broke up?”

“No..just..” The blonde puts some other folders out. “It’s nothing”

“You are sad”  
Philip sound concened. What for? He is not..moping around, is he? It’s just a bad day.

“Can we not talk about it?”

“About him? Or you being sad? Or-”  
“I..he is away now. Not sad, just..a bad day. I guess”

He avoids to look back at a rather silent Philip, keeps running his hands through the folders while silently kicking himself. Why can’t he just shut the fuck up? It’s not like confessing his relationship with Roy, he just admitted to be seeing someone, but he should be more careful.

He goes back to sit at the desk and concentrates on the files in front of him.  
Philip imitates him.

Except, once he is back on his chair, talks again in a lower voice. Just like they both do when someone of the others might pass by.  
“That’s a little… careless, Ed”

“What is?” Seriously, he should just bite his own tongue. He continues with the notes.

“Leaving you behind.”

“I’m capable of taking care of myself.”

“Not my point”

Edward looks up at him, unsure of the meaning of the last few words but before they can reach Philip’s eyes and make themselves clearer, the phone interrupts them.  
Philips moves immediately and turns his back to pick up.

“Research Lab 2. Arca Project.” He listens to someone on the other end for a moment. “Yes, ma’am. Just a moment”.  
He turns back at him with an inquiring glance. “A friend of yours, Hawkeye?”

Edward stands up nodding and gets closer to the phone, picking up the call.  
“Hello, it’s me”

“Edward, hi. I just wanted to tell you. They arrived in North City this morning. But the weather conditions are very bad and there are problems with the communications. Until it gets better, they will be cut out, I’m afraid”

“That’s shit”. He leans against the wall. “They will be stuck with the snow then. At least, the Lady has enough food and fuel to start a war.”  
He hazards a look toward the desk. Philip seems already absorbed by his report.

“Are you ok?” Riza asks.  
“Yeah, yeah. Fine.” He can’t help a smile, like if she were in front of him and in need of visive confirmation. “By the way, I was going to pass by to tell you I’m going to Dublith to see my master for the weekend.” The last thing he wanted was for Roy to call him once the line was accessible and find out there was no one.

“Don’t worry, I’ll tell him as soon as we can reach him”

“And..”

“I can phone you there if anything changes. Don’t worry”.


	5. Chapter 5

The engine wearily huffs as the train reaches Dublith’s station. Edward hurries to retrieve his luggage and get off.

The travel was unusually peaceful and gave him enough time to torture himself. He spent the last hours thinking about a million things. Those happened in the last few days. Those happened in the last year. And all over again.

Is he supposed to feel this unsettled? Is it because of the bond? Is it not? No way to find it out if they can’t restore the communications with North City and Briggs. A snow storm…their usual luck. Yet, Riza told him she would pass on any change. Also, her calling happened in the worst moment ever. Not like he was arguing with Philip. Actually, he is not sure what they were doing. One moment he was speaking no sense, the other he picked up the phone and his mood switched almost drastically. He kept working on his data and, about thirty minutes later, he made his excuses, wished him a good weekend with a big smile and went home. Their previous conversation almost forgotten. Forgotten? A part of him wished it was just like that. Admitting to Philip that he is seeing someone..what a jerk. How could have he been so careless? Not that Philip isn’t trustworthy. Not the kind of person who goes telling stories around. He was sad, nervous, and yeah, taken a bit by surprise by Philip’s shrewd questions and he just..

.. He keeps going back to that night. It was almost two months after what the brass acknowledged as “terrorist attack”. No one showed unusual interests towards the reasons behind his and Roy’ involvement. No reason to fear anything anymore, accordingly to Roy.

_“I know there is nothing to worry about anymore”_

_“Then why-“_

_“I won’t ruin your chances to reach the top. We already live together and go at work together. People might find it odd but we have been co-workers for years. That would still work. But if we come out as a c-“_

_“Edward, if you think I care about-“ “I know. I know. And I know people and they often make stupid choices based on stupid ideas. I love you too much to let you jeopardize it. Please, just..let me do this. Let me give you your best chance.”_

After a long discussion Roy barely agreed, even if he made very clear he doesn’t give a fuck about the whole deal. How can he be so stupid on this one thing when he is supposed to be brilliant and smart and shit? _“You know, someone showed me that sometimes you just have to go for it, even against all odds. You are asking me and that’s ok, for now. But I won’t wait to have four stars to come out with you. They are not worth you.”_

 _But you are_. Edward thought it back then. And now, too.

 

He can’t even say to be surprised when he sees the flow of people in front of him splitting in the middle, and Sig weaving his hand at him. “Sig, I still know the way down the house. There was no need to come and pick me up” he tells him while they make their way toward the butcher’s van, parked right outside. Sig lightens him of the luggage. “No sense” Sig hushes him. They chitchat, comforted by the noisy carburetor of the van. The seats smell like sawing and gasoline, just like he remembers them from his childhood. Recently, elections took place and now the new major -one of Izumi’s closest friends- is doing her best to satisfy everyone’s needs.

“And when they asked her where they were supposed to leave their children when they’re working, she decided to open a kindergarten…next to the police station.” Sig laughed happily. “Sometimes you just need a woman’s touch, isn’t it?” “Genius” Edward agrees. He sticks his head out the window, looking toward the front of the house.

“About women’s touch, how is she?” he asks. “You can see by yourself.” In fact, Izumi is already waiting for them in the garden. Edward gets off and approaches her with a wide smile. Last time they saw each other was in Central, days after the battle. Thanks to his father, it seems her health has had a considerable improvement. “Teacher, long time not..” He can’t finish the sentence.

He has offered a hand and she thought better, grabbing it and using her body to pry. She raises and makes him fly all the way over her head. He crushes miserably on the soil. “You still have a lot to learn, poor apprentice”. Sig laughs amused. “Some things never change”. He brings Edward’s luggage inside. Edward groans and sits up to shake his brown jacket. A big smile on his face. “No, they don’t. Nice to see you, too.”

He spends the next few hours updating them about everything that happened in Central since they left and asking the same about them. Moreover, it seems that Izumi has developed some kind of friendship with Olivier Armstrong (the idea of the two women in the same room is somehow terrifying), so they have been exchanging letters since the Promised Day.

Edward explained them that he was staying at a friend’s house because of a problem with the dormitories. Which is somehow not-a-lie (Roy eventually explained him about the bugs and scowled him about his choices in matter of renting) but he has no intention to pick up _that_ topic first thing into the conversation. There will be time. And hopefully a quick route for escaping from Izumi’s reaction. And maybe Al, to help him.

They ask him about Alphonse while cooking dinner and he describes them whatever his brother has wrote him until now -except for certain researches -. The conversation continues at the table.

“So Al is doing fine. What about Xing?” Izumi asks while pouring another glass of wine to Sig. She offers it to Edward, who declines waving his hand. “He is over his head. The desert was fun, the cuisine is delicious, the library is huge..”. “Are you going to stalk him over new recipes once he is back home?” “I already am”. He absently touches his forearm, slowly massaging it. “Is he studying alkaestry?” He tries to explain to them what makes it different from their own alchemy, referring to them what Al explained in his letters.

“It’s more ..precise under certain aspects” he concludes, wiping his mouth with the napkin.

“Al will have no problems. He has always been the patient one between you two.” “Mhm. That friend of ours, May Chang, she is teaching him. Also, he is willing to study the language and stuff.”. His smile widens by reflex. “Is that so?” Izumi glances at him with an unusual light in her eyes. She lights up a cigarette. Since when they knew her, no matter her conditions, she would have smoke her cigarette at the end of the meal.

“Yep.” Edward hurries to continue, “Also, he is madly in love with her, even if he refuses to talk about it. With me. And Ling. And Havoc..” He gains a raised eyebrow in response. From both Sig and Izumi. “Fine! We might have teased a little. But just wait and see. They are fucking perfect for each other”. He nods vigorously.

“I’m impressed. Have you ever thought that if your dreams become true, he might decide to stay in Xing? For good?” Izumi asks, exhaling the smoke of her cigarette. It curls up in the shape of spirals in the space between them. Silence falls on the table for a moment.

Edward put down the glass he is using, and keeps his eyes fixed on her as he quietly answers. “If that means he is going to be happy, yeah. Sure. As far as I know that he is safe, loved and happy, I’m happy, too. And even if we didn’t destroy our home back in Resembol, I doubt either of us would have ended up living there.”

“That’s..very mature of you, Edward” Izumi admits. She rests her chin on her palm, observing her former student as he resumes eating from his plate. “And what about him?”

Edward frowns.

“Would he do the same? Whoever you are going to choose?”

Since subtle is not a word he is going to learn anytime soon, he decided to choke on his last bite in that exact moment. He turns red and tries to catch up with his breath. Why do people manage to embarrass him when he is eating? Sig helps him with two vigorous packs. He starts breathing again, even if he has probably lost a lung in the process. He moves his eyes just to find Izumi looking at him with a grin on her face.

“WH-AT the..no, no. No,it’s not..yes he would but-” He breaths in one more time “-there is no need at the moment”. “Are you sure, Edward?” He nods with far too fervour. “Totally” he says, pouring himself a glass of water. “Mhm”.

 

 

Later in the evening, they finally get up from the table. That was an excellent dinner. Sig goes out to catch up with a friend and Edward helps her with the tidying up. He has to stretch to reach the top shelf and put in order the glasses. He refuses even to think about using a chair so that she can joke about it for the whole stay. “The chair won’t bite you” Never mind. “I’m not worried about the chair”. He makes her laugh.

“Do you mind?” he asks moving to open the window. It is a little too warm in there. She shrughs “Changing the subject, uh?” “What subject?” he answers back grinning. He decides to roll up his sleeves as well. He starts looking for the buttons on his wrist when he thinks better. Better not showing off the leather armlet.

“All these years and you’re still the shrimp that came to knock at my door..”

He turns to retrieve the last items from the dining room. “AH! AH! Funny-”

He is walking down the kitchen when the floor and the walls start to move by their own will. If there was a rug he might have thought that it was pulled from under his feet. But there isn’t. Hazy outlines dance in front of his eyes. He hears his metal shoulder banging against the wall.

“Edward!!”

Hands wet with water and soap come to grab him, helping to lean his back against the wall. It is just a moment. He closes and opens the eyes a couple of times.

“It’s all right.” He seizes his forearm and repeats, “It’s all right”. It seems to Mrs. Curtis that he is talking more to himself than to her.

Then he looks back at her and adds, “Sorry, it was just a little dizziness.” He straights up. Izumi is looking at him with concerned eyes.

“Really, I’m fine.”

It appears to Mrs.Curtis the very contrary. He is white as a ghost, eyes wide and a shaky smile put on trying to convince her to let it go. “You better go to lay down Edward. I’ll finish up.” She suggests as calmly as possible.

“But..” “I want you in shape for tomorrow. We are going to trainee.”

Edward’s smile strengthens a little bit. “Fine” And this is not like Edward.

“Teacher, before I go can I use the phone?” “Sure” “ ’night”

Izumi’s eyes follow him while he goes in the next room, looking for the phone. She turns off the water and eavesdrops toward the living room.

 

“Havoc, hi. It’s me..”

. .. .

“Yes, I’m good. Sorry for the hour-“

… “Did he called or..”

… ..

“I see” The tone slightly tenses.

…

“No, no. Really. Everything’s fine. .Just checkin’ up”

.. …

“Mhm, I know”

..

“Thanks. Bye”

 

Edward hangs up but lingers in front of the stairs for a moment before heading for bed.

Izumi finishes tidying up on her own and sits in her armchair with a book to keep occupied her hands. Her thoughts are settled on the conversation she just overheard. And on whatever just happened.

 

 

By the time Sig comes back home, it’s the dead of night. Usually he would silently walk through the house not to wake her up. And this time they have a guest, too. Therefore, it takes him by surprise to find her awake when he enters the living room. “Izumi” he murmurs “is everything ok?” Izumi closes the unread book and puts it down on the floor next to her. She looks at him. He knows that look. The boys. She had it when they visited and told her about Truth. When she found out what happened to them. They could have lost the chance to have another baby, but Edward and Alphonse were the children they have never had. “I don’t think so” she whispers. She rapidly updates him about what happened after dinner.

“I don’t think Alphonse would have left if there was something wrong with Ed.” Sig almost immediately points out.

“I know but..” Izumi concedes, “I... A moment he was speaking and then..It was as if someone turned off a switch” she shakes her head.

“You are worrying too much. Probably he was just tired. You should rest, too. It has been a long day” he brushes her chin, trying to cheer her up.

“Go ahead, I’ll come in a moment” she kisses him goodnight.

‘ _It’s all right’…‘It’s all right’_

“What are you not telling me, Ed?”

 

 

Next morning Edward is sitting in the kitchen with a mug of tea in front of him when Izumi comes downstairs. “You are already up” she states flatly. “I was worried you would beat me out of bed” Edward greets her. The bags under his eyes are even more marked then yesterday. It is blatant he couldn’t get any sleep. Neither last night nor the previous.

“Eat” She moves the cookie’s box in front of him “We’re going out today”.

“Where?” he says, drinking another sip of tea. He doesn’t take any biscuit.

“We’ll be out until night. We are going on the island”

“Why?!” he almost shouts, surprised.

He gets a slipper on his head in return. “Ouch!”

“What did I teach you about futile questions?”

“Fuck” he murmurs while picking his nose septum.

It’s the wooden spoon turn to be used. On his shoulder.

“Language!”

 

It is going to be a long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case someone missed it, there is another work from Breathless' series, Tides. It's an interesting prequiel to Moonlight ;)


	6. Chapter 6

The birds move from one branch to another, disturbed by the unusual show. All year around the island is probably peaceful enough for them to fear nothing. Not today.

“Is that the best you’ve got?” Edward mocks Izumi.

They arrived on the island sooner in the morning and, after starting the fire for lunch they started hacking, looking for some herbs Izumi needed for the butchery. And some food.

Then a quick meal, and here they are, fight training.

“I’ve haven’t even started, shrimp”

Edward flings against her again, choosing to fake a side attack and sliding behind her instead. 

“Nice try” she stops him by dancing around his movements. His foot catches nothing but the ground.

“How many hours do you train now?”

Edward huffs, and starts another path of actions while answering,

“Six hours in.. a week? Plus gym, one .. one hour per day”

Izumi seizes him with a ironic smile. “You got lazy”

“Like hell. I-”, he stop stalking to jump. “..I don’t have enough time to d- Ouch!”

“Is it 17-9 for me, isn’t it?” Izumi says as she approaches again.

“What are you doing now?”

“Working with Investigation. Plus a research project with some guys from the university”

“Research?” She takes her chance to try hitting him. He dodges it, barely.

“Yeah, sort of. Archeologic stuff. They needed some alchemist to help them.”

“That suits you. Why don’t you ask for a place at the CU?”

“What?” Edward asks surprised. He manages to hit her on the leg. “One for me, Teacher”. 

“They have an Alchemy Department, you know? You might even be able to teach if you work on your temper”. Edward makes a face – because really, she is the one to talk– but skips it and answers back instead.

“Not really my thing. I mean, I like them but..not my place”. And for as strange it might sound, it is true. Even Alphonse suggested it some time ago. He is keen on that kind of stuff and always interested in a bunch of different things. He eats up books in no time. But that’s..how he has always been. About pretty much anything. He found out more important things. Helping people thanks to his work, even if now it was investigation and stuff, is fulfilling. More than that. 

Helping doing things better. No matter how many stupid or boring shit can happen, this is what he wants. Make the difference with his own hands. Investigation came up by accident – Haruko could have had use of him in pretty much any department if he didn’t like the choice – but it got under his skin and he ended up following Huges’ steps. He would have laughed his ass off if he was there to see.

“You were supposed to leave the Military the moment you restored Al.”

Izumi’s words hang like smoke as they keep moving.

Yeah, he was. Years ago, he had sworn on everything he was able to think about to leave the damn place as soon as he could. And she knows. 

In the while, so many things have changed. And this time he is thinking about him and Roy. 

“Well, there was need to-“ , he stops Izumi’s sudden hit. 

A rapid sequence of fists follows, then a kick against his leg. “Fuck”

So many things have changed but he has changed too. .

“You have to be concentrated. Your brain is your first and best weapon.”

“I know”

“Do you?”

She manages to dodge him and takes her chance to hit him on the back. 

“Why don’t you leave now?”

“Wh-?”

“Quit the military”

“I..I have things to do. Help to fix everything and..”

He is still moving to stand up when engages again, aiming to surprise her. She dodges it by an inch.

“Your body is fine.” She straightens up, “But your mind is not the same as always.”

“I am fine.” 

 

 

Getting Edward nervous has always been easy and Izumi knows it. This time it is even easier. She realizes to have hit some kind of raw nerve. 

Edward’s moves have become much and much unprecise within a few focused comments.

“Quit the military”

“I..I have things to do. Help to fix everything and..”

He is still moving to stand up when engages again, aiming to surprise her. She dodges it by an inch.

“Your body is fine.” She straightens up, “But your mind is not the same as always.”

“I am fine.” 

But Izumi is ready and grounds him before transmuting some ropes to keep him tight down.

“Let me go!”

“Not until you start being honest with me.” He doesn’t stop moving but fixes his eyes on her.

“I am”. 

Wrong answer. Teacher’s severe glare burns against his skin. 

“What happened? I know you. Since you arrived, I noticed something’s off.”

He is still fighting against the ropes in the attempt to break free. 

“Teacher..”

“Something is worrying you. It’s not about Al, obviously. Which worries me even more because you are not the kind of man-“

“..please”

He stopped moving but if she didn’t know better she’d say he is in pain right now.

“Edward-“

“I am gonna have a panic attack if you don’t let me go right now”, he admits gritting his teeth.

Edward is not lying. His breath is coming in and out in a rapid pace.

Izumi hurries up to free him.

He turns away. Looking at nothing in particular. 

She moves toward the fire and he follows her in silence. They just sit there for a while.

“What happened?”

Edward finally looks her in the eyes. And he answers.

 

He starts with telling her about his father and what the Dwarf in the flask did to him. The stories about souls being bonded to each other. How the Dwarf fucked it all up and a person ended up bonded with that thing. Then he passes to explain how Lokan survived until he found him. Until he kidnapped him. 

He doesn’t go into details but by the grey shade on Teacher’s face and thanks to his little display from before, she probably has got just enough. 

And that some months ago, being running out of time, he made his last move by taking him again and trying to impose himself as soulmate. 

“So you are saying ..Xerxenian alchemy differs from both Amestrian and Xingan alchemy”

“I..wasn’t exactly within myself. That’s what Alphonse is trying to understand while he is studying in Xing. Along with other things about our heritage.”

“Your being here means you managed to stop him. How?”

He has kept the most relevant aspect away from the conversation. Until now.

“There was someone else with me. They distracted him and made it possible for me to.. break free. Fact is, I killed him, but he managed to shot them before I could do anything.”

He gets shiver remembering those moments. Sometimes he still gets nightmares about Roy bleeding to death on that floor. Fortunately, he finds him right beside him when he wakes up in terror. 

“I am sorry” she murmurs, misunderstanding his reaction. Understandably.

Edward breaths in and continues ignoring her words.

“I couldn’t let them go. And before you slap me, no! I am not talking about human transmutation. Not as we understand it.”

She has already jumped on her feet, her face a mask of terror and surprise.

“It doesn’t change anything! What did you do Edward?”

“I..performed Xerxenian alchemy, as far as I can understand. I saved them. By bonding our souls.”

“You learnt nothing?! You know how fragile souls are. And even if it is just a guess, you would have ended up mostly dead from the exertion-“ Edward nods at her words.

“Which I did, actually. I have been in hospital for weeks.” He quietly explains, a half smile on his lips. 

“Why Edward?!”

“Because we are in love with each other”.

Horror leaves place to something else, Edward is not sure if it’s stupor or what. 

“We already were..” 

She walks around the fire trying to calm down. He lets her.

“What does it have to do with what happened yesterday?”

“This bond. It didn’t just save us. It links us at a deeper level. We sense each other, at some extent. Not always so clearly as my words suggest, maybe, but enough to notice there is someone else other than you?” he smiles, tiredly. 

“Since it’s something related to our blood, Al could develop it, too. We are keeping it a secret, to protect us from curious alchemists and because going public with Roy right now might mean political suicide for him and that’s the last thing I want.”

Speaking aloud about it with someone, especially with her, who has been some kind of a mother for him, makes his heart a bit lighter. And she is absolutely right on one thing. He is worried. And being worried means trouble.

Teacher just said something but he didn’t get it.

“Sorry, what?”

“You are dating that man” she says in a neutral tone, “Mustang.”

“Shit” his lips move by their own accord. Izumi’s eyes bright with humour and a grin surface for the first time since they started their talk.

“What? You think I would give him hell, didn’t you?”

“Well..”

“Actually, I am going to congratulate with him for his immense patience-“ 

“Ohi!”

-and spirit of self-sacrifice for being stuck with such a pain in the ass” she comes closer and ruffles his hair.

“.. and then I’m gonna remind him that I’ll be the second person to kick his sorry ass if he does anything to hurt you.”

“Second?” She is looking for something in her backpack.

“Seriously Edward? “Do you even know your brother?”

She passes him some bread and chocolate and sits again by his side.

“So, when last night you almost fainted..” Izumi leaves the period open.

Edward rubs his eyes “I don’t know. Something happened. Not something too bad, but something..big. And I can’t know for sure because he’s in the fucking North and lines got frozen and it’s driving me crazy”

“I see”

“What?”

“Your problem. You lost your equilibrium, Edward. You need to find a new one.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You spent literally most of your life running, with your brother’s safety as purpose. Now he no more needs you..”

Edward glares at her but she continues.

“..not in that way. He is away. You defeated your enemies, brought his body back. You found someone.” 

“But all these changes destabilized your inner equilibrium. Your previous instincts fight to stay. Don’t you see? “

“I..guess”

“You just told me you’re keeping your relationship a secret. Why?”

“He..his career. I don’t want to ruin it.”

“And here is another problem. Why do you think you’d ruin it?”

“Seriously? For starting, he was my CO. He recruited me when I was a boy. What do you think they will-“

“Exactly” she interrupts him. “They would. Not you. You are not the problem, Edward.” 

“Also important, maybe they aren’t either.” He shakes his head, sceptic.

“You are so wary that you can’t see clearly. At the moment, your Mustang is the most beloved public figure in the country. Not just because of Bradley. They saw what he did to amend his actions during the war. Actions he delivered by orders. And still, he took responsibility for it. And then the Retirement Act. Can’t you see it? And then there is you. You, the man who unmasked the whole deal, the alchemist of the people. You saved them all. You helped people all over the country, inspired them. Everyone saw how much you helped in the reconstruction.”

“Now tell me, if you were in their shoes, how would his love for you or yours for him diminish their consideration toward the both of you?”

“I..it’s complicated”

“Does he agree with you?” she asks curious.

“Fuck no. He is all mushy and shit. Keeps telling me he doesn’t care.”

“Good”. He huffs, clearly disappointed at them both.

“Think about it, Edward. Now, apart from resolving your hyper protective attitudes..I have something else to suggest. Since it seems your bond has a great deal of psychological sharing, I think you should concentrate on meditation”

Edward makes a point to roll his eyes at the world.

He wasn’t totally unrelated to the practice. She taught them the fundamentals years ago but he has never been fond of it. It was too..difficult. Usually, he and Al did sit to meditate while Teacher checked on them thanks to a simple alchemical circle meant to show the subject’s concentration.

“You can make all the faces you like, little brat. But you know the best way to keep your mind trained is through it, and based on what you just told me, it will be good for both you and your boyfriend. He should do it, too.”

On the word boyfriend her voices turned on a dangerous tone.

“Listen-“

“I have never given you much credit when it comes to aesthetics, with all those gargoyles. But I have to say.. you chose for yourself a nice piece of meat-”

“Don’t say nothing like that ever again!” He is going to die of embarrassment. “What’s wrong with you and Al?! I get this shit all the time-“

“That happens when you fall in love with a model.”

 

 

The frozen soul cracks under his firsts steps in north City. He spent time in the West and in the South during the past years. And in the East, obviously. But he never travelled up North, neither for leisure or work.

Edward warned him about the weather and with good reason. The coat he is wearing barely protects him from the chilly wind, which greets him as soon as he gets off. Roy wonders what he is doing right now. He hopes he faked his real emotions good enough for him not to worry, back at the station. 

The men of the security detail are organizing among themselves when another group of soldiers makes its entrance in the station. Another detail of course. Grumman’s.

The old general walks swiftly in his direction, his mustaches vibrating with happiness.

“I hope you travelled well, General. And congratulations again for your promotion”. They shake hands.

“Thank you. The travel was fine.” They start moving through the other passengers to reach the trucks.

“Isn’t Riza with you?”. Roy shakes his head. The mustaches ruffle, displeased. 

“I hoped I would have been able to see her. I never get enough time to visit her, even when I am in Central. Did she dump you?” 

“Sort of”

As a matter of fact, Roy could have used her or the others’ company in the travel but they were all better served in Central during the following days. And not just because of the work piling up. Knowing that he left Edward behind but not alone was helping, even if just a little. He sighs internally.

“So, how have been things here until now?” He rubs his hands together in the attempt to keep them warm. 

“Quite interesting. Everyone keeps talking about Haruko’s absence.” 

Therefore, about him being here. 

“I see” They get on the truck while the soldiers finish setting things for leaving. It’s warmer. Just a little bit.

“We were waiting for you before heading toward Briggs. General Armstrong gave order to prepare our lodgings but no one is fond about it.”

“They would have preferred North City”. 

“They do. But we can’t help it. Weather is changing. We’re expecting a storm. “ 

He gains raised eyebrows from Roy. What is the matter with it? 

Grumman nods anticipating him.

“Oh, I forgot. It’s your first time here, is it? When they say storm here, it means much more trouble than this. I hate having to do general exercitations whenever they happen to be planned in the North. Half of the time, it’s just you freezing your ass off while shooting.” 

“And the other half?” Roy asks curious.

Grumman looks at him very, very thoughtfully.

“Freeze your ass off while shitting”.

He just can’t help a smirk. He missed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From now on things get more interesting. As for the updates, please bear with me. This time of the year is hell. And not just because of the red stuff and fireplaces lol Thank you for being here, hugs


	7. Chapter 7

“I’ll be back in no time. Join the others and ask for something hot”.

 

Grumman disappears as soon as they enter the hotel and he is left to face the other generals alone.

 

With himself, the Military counts fourteen Generals in total, one in each province. However, whenever a general exercitation is planned, just the main generals in charge of each area -north, east, central, west and south- are asked to participate along with a part of their troops. Obviously, regarding to Central the role is traditionally covered by the Fuhrer himself. Bradley at the time. And now Haruko.

 

In other words, it never happened for the Fuhrer to desert such an event, sending another general from his area instead. Roy kind of expected to be moved again in the East after the promotion -because of his previous assignments and recent efforts in favor of the Ishvalan communities. But Haruko surprised him by confirming him in Central.

 

He kept it quiet as much as possible with Edward because last thing he wants is to make him worried but there are several reasons for which Haruko might have decided to stay in Central. And none of them are good.

 

The bar is reechoing with the chatters of the other two generals, Abil Sloane and Winston Arren.

 

Sloane è in carica da diversi anni. He served under the late general in the South and after he died by the hands of Father’s puppets, Sloane succeeded. He didn’t had any tie with the brass’ scheming and Haruko judged him for his experience in the area. A good fighter, he isn’t an alchemist and has a gift for good administration.

 

Arren is another matter at all. Maes introduced them when the they were nothing more than recruits and Winston was serving as sergeant in the East. He was Maes’s childhood friend. There was a good age gap between him and Maes but it never mattered. They grew up together and when the time came Maes decided to join as well, aiming for investigation instead. Last time Roy saw Arren it was at Maes funeral. They didn't even spoke to each other.

 

“Mustang, we thought you lost the train. With this weather..” the older general greets him.

 

“Thank you for waiting”

 

“Where is Grumman?” Arren asks sharply.

 

“He is sending a telegram before we leave for Briggs.”.

 

“The Fuhrer likes to be kept informed.” He says back, observing him.

 

He smiles politely, neither agreeing nor objecting at the comment. Sloane keeps talking instead.

 

“We red on the journals that your promotion was quite something..”

 

Arren is about to say something, but is interrupted by a friendly pat on the shoulder.

 

Grumman has just saved the conversation by joining them again. “We are ready to go, gentlemen. Whenever you are ready.”

 

The others head outside. Grumman takes a look toward the glass door of the hall. The snow has been increasing since morning. “The communications have already been cut down. I managed to confirm your arrival here just in time”, he comments out loud.

 

Roy takes a moment to digest the news. He hopes it is just a temporary problem. Being not able to even phone home seems just..dreadful.

 

“Did they tell you when they will restore it?”

 

“They can’t say it themselves. Snow storms are messy things. Or so I am told.” Then he gets moving once more, adding, “Let’s go.”

 

This is going to be a long week, Roy lets himself think before following his former CO.

 

 

North City’s chilly air is nothing compared to Brigg’s. He can hardly believe there are people who manage to live here all year along. He recalls Edward’s description about his stay in the base. He would have been glad to have him here with him, but such a weather could make serious harm, considering his ports. The one time Edward ender up in the North, he almost got a frostbite, unaware of the risks for an auto mail user with such temperature.

 

Olivie Armstrong started pushing around him as soon as he got out of the truck, like if she was trying to make up for the lost time or something. He is lucky to have a good resilience. He ended up sharing the bedroom with Grumman. Which is by any means far better at the eventuality to share it with one of the other generals.

 

Apart from them, the only real problem here is the storm. The weather, already unbearable, is made harder by the never stopping wind. Soldiers are having a rough time going through the planned exercises. Even Armstrong’s men are having difficulties.

 

Roy fits closer the collar of his coat, trying to protect himself from the harsh climate. Last thing he needs is getting a cold..

 

He is not the kind of man who usually refuses the other’s company but even he must admit just how hard is getting be away from home. How hard is being away from Edward. He underrated the ways the bond could affect them. After all, they have been together for several months now and they have never faced a separation longer than a few hours.

 

The idea of making Edward suffer because of his decision makes him worry even more. Is there a chance he made a rushed decision by accepting the assignment? If he can hardly hold back his bad mood, what is he going through?

 

Another violent blast of snowy wind hits them all, interrupting his thoughts.

 

“It’s a little chilly here. Would you mind?” Grumman asks showing him the wood already in place for the bonfires. Several piles have been prepared to warm up the soldiers during the day.

 

“Of course”, Roy responds, rapidly wearing his gloves.

 

 

It is late in the afternoon when Roy makes it to his bedroom. Barely three days passed since he arrived in the North. He jumps inside the bathtub with a groan. He spent the whole time teaching his troops the best way to move on the field, to keep track of the enemy (in this case, the other’s troops) and so on. In the morning, what started as a debrief for his men turned soon into a strategy conference, when men from the other areas got interested and joined to listen as well. Even Arren spent the whole time listening at him.

 

He would gladly close himself in his –and Grumman- room to get some rest. Unfortunately, Armstrong has very different ideas about how they should spend their Saturday night.

 

In the morning, she passed on that they were expected in a manor not far from there. The owner decided to host a banquet in their honour. They were supposed to spend their night there, too.

 

‘And you don’t want to let down one of our biggest contractors in the iron and steel field, do you?’

 

In other words, politics.

 

 

The music is a little too oldish and the laughs of the other guests -rich gentlemen and ladies all young enough to tell stories about the beginning of Time- but other than that it could be called a decent banquet. The food is strangely good considered the poorness of the area. But it shouldn’t surprise the extent of the advantages given by wealth.

 

Roy has just spent one good hour pleasing the host with talks about traiding delas and God knows what when he makes it to the far corner of the room, next to the table laden with food and drinks.

 

One more time he guesses about what Edwards could be up right now. Certainly Riza informed him about the problems they are having with communication so that’s not what worries him. If Edward is having the same reactions he is experimenting.. The first day it was the worst mood he had ever experienced. But that was it. Within barely 24 hours it turned into deep blank sadness. By the third it already went past over the first stages of anxiety.

 

Apparently he is not the only one looking for a break. Or an hideout.

 

Arren is there too. And Sloane is keeping him good company.

 

“Mustang! Join us in our nest! Did you paid your respects to the host? He told he has some good statues and painting here but I’m not really interested in that kind of stuff”

 

Roy joins them and pours himself some wine to keep his hands busy. His eyes fixes on Arren and he is not surprised when he sees the other man observing him in return. He has been waiting a good chance to get to talk with him. If only Sloane wasn’t-

 

“You fool woulnd’t recognize beauty even if they were to stick it in your eyes. Come with me, that charming lady has been gaping at you for twenty minutes now.” Grumman thunders from behind him as he drags a rather interested Sloane out of reach.

 

He walks closer and imitates Winston by leaning against the wall. There is no need for preambles.

 

"You blame me for what happened" he murmurs to the man next to him.

 

Arren doen’t look at him, neither he seems shocked by his approach. He moves his glass in his hand, looking at the red wine in it, in silence.

 

"I do not" he says back, after a minute.

 

"Still you hate me". Arren shakes his head and turns his head to look at him.

 

"I..I hate the circumstances. I hate how knowing me brought Maes to you and then to die. Sometimes it's easier to.. pretend to hate you.". He lowers his eyes again at the admission.

 

"I blame myself." Those words tastes like smoke in his throat, on his tongue.

 

"Knowing you didn't get him killed. Being my friend did."

 

If he never asked for his help with the homunculus, if he never asked to work together once in Central, if he..

 

“If I never befriended him when we were at the Academy.."

 

"I think he would disagree by all means". Roy’s eyes runs back to Winston.

 

"This one time, we were dining at the camp and we saw you defending another recruit from some bullies. You gave them hell."

 

"I remember that"

 

"That's when he told me he wanted to know who you were. At the time I was a sergeant and I suggested him to stay close to those who were supposed to get on the ranks. He told me ' I don't know if he is supposed to. But he should'. I guess he was right." He gives in to a little smirk.

 

Roy is too shaken by his story to talk for a good minute. When he is positive that his voice won’t tremble, he answers back.

 

"Thank you for sharing this with me, Arren"

 

"I can't promise you to change my attitude right away. But he entrusted you. And I trusted him. You have my respect, Mustang."

 

Maes has his ways of completely take him surprise even now.

 

Winston offers his hand to shake.  
And Roy does.

 

"Weeell, up here they know how to prepare a good punch, that's sure. And Abil has just deserted the banquet, if you know what I mean.”  
The moustaches vibrate with utter satisfaction as they plunge into the glass. If they are more pleased by the outcome of his manoeuvres with the two of them, or of those with Sloane, that’s difficult to say.

 

"You should take it easy, Grumman. I still remember the party you gave last year when East was chosen". Mustang smiles apologetically as the other looks at him once more before leaving. The rumours reached his ears too. Grumman shakes his head, denying.

 

"They say you started the arrangements for the fireworks weeks before the date. Is it true that the Xingan immigrants lend you a hand?" Armstrong joins the conversation.

 

"Well, you were there. Do you remember those boys serving in the kitchens..” Grumman starts chanting his gestures to her.

 

"I'll get something to drink", Roy mouths in her direction and taking his chance.

 

Instead he intercepts the butler who greeted them at the arrival, who seems to be in charge of everything.

 

"There is somewhere quite where I can get some fresh air?"

 

"The gallery Sir? Your host is always happy when someone enjoys the view and most of the guests are always too absorbed by the dancing to care."

 

"Perfect"

 

"Follow me, please"

 

 

He is left alone once in front of the door. Roy enters and locks the door behind him before calmly walking down the gallery, enjoying the silence. The ball is hosted in the opposite wing of the building.

 

Grumman is sometimes unbearably cheerful once he drinks a few glasses of wine and he decided to run when Olivie made the tactical error to join their conversation.

 

He stops in front of one painting. The frame has been damaged, probably by fire, but the painting is intact.

 

A wonderful drawing.

 

A woman of rare beauty is sitting on the grass, her golden hair falling all over the shoulders and down on the ground, where the fairies dance. At her feet, a handsome man, a crown made of oak’s branches on his head.

 

_Queen Titania and Prince Oberon. A Midsummer Night’s Dream._

 

Again, he wishes Edward by his side. He would have known what the story was about. He always does. Besides, there is something in the way the woman tilts her head to look down at Oberon, which reminds him of Ed. He sighs heavily in the silent room.

 

“That’s an incredible painting, isn’t it?”

 

A man has joined him in front of the painting, almost out of nowhere.

 

Roy waits a moment before asking back, without moving his eyes from the image.

 

“Do you know who is this?”

 

“The painter? No, but rumors are that he was mad with love for a woman he saw in dream. I saw it for the first time many years ago. That’s a sight you will never find annoying. I assure you.”

 

Roy slowly turns his head to take the first look to his interlocutor. A once stout man, still in his forces, about fifty-five, sixty-five years old. Red hair and beard. Trim but spartan in both outfit and aspect. Military posture. His boots and trousers are not wet so didn’t just came in from outside.

 

“And what does a military who’s an expert in antiquities and has a thing for locks want from me?”

 

He locked the door behind him when he entered the gallery.

 

The man’s lips twitch into a smile.

 

“I’ve been waiting to arrange a meeting with you”.

 

“Who are you?”

 

“Call me Henry, if you like. It’s not my name, but it will do for now. I am sorry but some precautions are in order.”

 

“I would dare to say the same thing” Roy agrees, taking his hands out of the pockets. He is wearing his gloves.

 

The man in front of him nods, unimpressed.

 

“I see. But you should know I’m unarmed. I only bring the best intentions.”

 

“I understand you have something to say. Speak, then”.

 

The man keeps staring at him as he speaks, his eyes wide with what seems to be awe.

 

“The resemblance is astonishing.” He finally murmurs back.

 

Not the reaction he usually gets when he has his gloves on.

 

“What?”

 

“I was an acquaintance of your parents.”

 

If Roy were to give credit to the man’s body language, he’d admit he is saying the truth. Which is unbelievable. The topic has always been a delicate one for Roy and not just for the obvious reasons. Becoming orphan on such a young age, he couldn’t remember that much of his parents and during his adolescence he got that demanding about getting information that one evening Chris ended up crying. She never did. He hated himself and decided to stop. Then he started to learn alchemy and he kept avoiding thinking about it that much.

 

He hasn’t moved a single muscle. Henry takes it as a signal to keep talking.

 

“I knew them. Grown up with your mother, actually. I.. didn’t have a chance to approach you until today. When I knew they were planning the banquet, I took my chance.”

 

“Then why didn’t you come out in the sunlight but waited to sneak through the shadows?”

 

“You know why.”

 

Roy resist the urge to frown. What could possibly hold back this man from getting in contact with him if he’s just interested in meeting the son of his dead friends? If what he is saying is true, to even start for..

 

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

 

Henry waits a moment, like if he is expecting Roy to add something to the precedent statement. Awareness slowly shows up on his face in the silence between them.

 

“You..you don’t know.” He pauses.

 

Fine. At this point Roy is almost sure the man needs some help because what he is saying makes no sense at all.

 

“They never..how could..you don’t know who you are!”

 

“I am perfectly aware of who I am. I am General Roy Mustang. Maybe you confused me with someone else..”

 

“What? How could I? You are your father’s image. I looked for you for so long. I wouldn’t step ahead if we weren’t sure. But we don’t have time for this, now. And you wouldn’t believe me without any proof. You are a man of actions, like myself.”

 

Roy tenses immediately.

 

“I am going to get them, but I need some time. Maybe you will find something sooner, now that you know..I am sure. Then you will trust my words. When the time comes, I will contact you again.”

 

“You are just playing with me. You probably heard about me being an orphan and thought of deceiving me. What is it that you really want? Roy tilts his head, raising his glove to keep the man from moving. “And why should I trust one single word?”

 

“Because I seem to understand you have your father’s intuition to recognize a lie from a truth. You are very much alike. Not in everything though. You have Hannah’s eyes”.

 

Roy’s heart jumps a beat. His world has just been turned upside down. It took just four words.

 

“What did you say!?” Roy’s voice raises with surprise but is soon covered by the sound of the door, opening. Someone enters the gallery, not far from them.

 

It’s a split of a second. Roy turns to see the light coming in from the open door and who is coming in. When he turns back, Henry has disappeared. If he was on his own maybe he would have gone after him. But now..

 

“Sir, is everything all right? I thought to have heard some voices and..” the butler approaches with a slow stride, making his excuses.

 

“It’s ok. I was talking to myself”

 

Then it occurs him to ask the man about the painting Henry seemed to know.

 

“Ah. Yes, it was a gift from some friends over the border. Emigrants. The master had it for almost thirty years now. The madam told me it was saved from a terrible fire and that’s why the frame and the plaque are a little damaged. I always found it a little sad.”

 

“Thank you.” His heart is still thundering in his chest. He needs air..space to think about what just happened. Most of all he needs..

 

“Do you also happen to know if we have the phone lines back in function?”

 

“I’m afraid not, Sir. When the storm comes, it is not unusual to stay cut out from the civilization for weeks at the time” he calmly nods at his own words.

 

“I see. Please, make my excuses with the other generals. I’m going to turn in now.”

 

“Of course, General.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this the present/chapter you were waiting for? I do hope so. I'll update more during Christmas' holidays. In the meanwhile, I wish you a bunch of good food, good music and very good friends *****


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter before New Year's Eve.  
> Good news for 2018: I'll be posting the following chapter first thing into the New Year ;D  
> We all need to start it properly lol
> 
> ps: I'm fighting against the editing. Why can't I manage to make HTML work? T^T

“Are you telling me she left you two children on your own on that island? Without food?”  
“Pretty much”. Edward is spending his Monday afternoon at the Labs and as soon as he put foot in there Philip demanded a detailed report about the weekend.  
“Jeez..”  
Philip looks the same as always. Whatever mood possessed him the other day seems gone. “So, you didn’t relax that much after all”  
He shrugs “As much relax as you can get with your alchemy teacher”. Edward almost tips over a graduated container as he sits down at his desk. They should tidy up the place. He and Philip ended up using every single surface available to put files, books, bottles of chemicals and so on.  
Philip smiles at the concession. There is a knock on the open door of their shared office. It’s one of the other guys. “We’re leaving if you guys don’t need anything?”  
“Yeah, we are leaving in a few minutes, too. See you” The head researcher answers them.  
“Bye” Edward waves one hand at them and looks at the clock. God knows what is doing Roy right now. If only the communications were restored-  
“Edward”. He almost jumps from the surprise. Philip has leaned against the desk and is now looking at him with fond eyes.  
“Yes?”  
“Sometimes I wonder what goes through your mind to be so distracted” Philip says pocking at his forehead.  
“I was saying, Friday night a friend of mine is going to present his latest book, it’s about vegetal-related transmutations and chemical variations. Would you like to come?”  
“He’s the one who theorized the Lindel’s synthesis.” Edward gets up and goes to replace the files in their boxes. “You know him?” comes Philip’s surprised comment.  
“That man has some good ideas when it comes to circle drawings. I am coming. A brat I know idolatries him”, he adds thinking to Russel, “I’m telling him too. Where is it?”  
Philip shakes his head, rather excited, “We can meet up here and call a cab. It’s just a few blocks”  
“Great.” He turns his back to him and retrieves his coat from the metal hanger.  
“Edward-“ Philip starts just to be interrupted.  
Another knock on the door. Edward turns to take a look. Jean is on the doorstep and he and Philip are looking at each other.  
“Jean”  
“Ed. Am I early?”  
“Nope. Come in. This is Philip, we’re working together on this mess.” He points at the boxes around them. “And Philip, this is Lieutenant Jean Havoc, we work together at the Headquarters.”  
“Nice to meet you” Philip replies politely and shakes Havoc’s hand. “So, how’s working at Investigations?”  
“Actually, I don’t work at Investigations.” Edward nods, as Jean continues “I’m under General Mustang command.” Philip still at it and frowns “Isn’t he your ex-CO?”  
“Yep. I guess he can’t help but employing me”.  
“The kid has many talents. One of them is loyalty”. Havoc stops walking to glance at Philip and Edward.  
The young alchemist burst into laughs at the wording. “That, Philip, is a fashionable way to say I’m still their dog.”  
“I see”. Edward frowns because Philip is making a strange face. Didn’t he get the joke?  
“Goodnight Ed. Lieutenant, nice to have met you.” The lamppost just turned on and the humid air promises trouble for the days to come. After all it’s almost autumn and they’ve been already lucky enough.  
“See you tomorrow”. Then, to Jean, “Let’s go”.  
But Havoc is still looking in Philip’s direction as he leaves.  
“What is it?”. Jean shakes his head, dismissing the question and smiling at him.  
“Nothing, Boss. What do you want to eat?”

 

Next day he spends the morning at the Labs, where Philip gives him the details about Friday and after lunch he deals with the usual mess at the office. Riza phoned to let him know that the lines were still off so all he can do is bury himself into work and trying to keep his anxiety at bay.  
Home seems as cold as Briggs by the time he gets back. He collapses onto the couch. He is considering taking a bath when he gets another idea. He takes the receiver and sticks out to dial the number by memory. At this hour, he won’t disturb her too much. Winry answers after a few seconds.  
“Garfield’s, Rockbell speaking”  
“Hi, it’s me”. She huffs and he hears the sound of something being propped on the working table.  
“What? You’re.. calling? I mean, actually calling me?” Then she pauses. “It’s because you broke your leg or are you in hospital?” she quickly adds with a worried tone.  
“Nope. I’m calling from home”  
She sights relaxing.  
“Thank god. You moron. Wait, I’ll pick the call from the back shop.”  
He moves on the couch, and she is on line again.  
“Here. How are you doing?”  
“Same as always. What about you?”  
“Try again”  
“What?”  
“You sound a little off. Everything ok between you two?”  
Winry found out about him and Roy almost immediately. He would have told her of course. In time. Except for the fact that she is a hound when it comes to certain things. When she came in central to see Alphonse off she needed ten seconds with them to figure it out. She waited until he walked her back to the hotel to spill it out.  
Edward didn’t tell her about the marks. Alphonse managed to keep his stay at the hospital hidden by telling her and everyone else he was on mission so there had been no problems so far. He wishes to tell her, but the last time they saw each other they still were on red alert and he prefers to explain things in person and not at the phone. Really, working at Investigations is making him paranoid.  
“Yeah, yeah. It’s just..Roy’s away, a mission in the North. I was feeling kinda lonely and I called you.”  
She laughs mildly amused for something. “Do I have to call him and threaten to behave?”  
“Ohi, it’s not like he’s gone in the North to do..stuff!”  
“I didn’t mean it that way Ed!” she laughs lightly, “You just sound like a jealous fiancée”.  
Just the tiniest hesitation before Edward’s acid “Please” is all it gets.  
“Oh”  
She breathes in, preparing - Edward is painfully unaware- an apocalypse.  
“Winry why did you Oh me-”  
“EDWARD ELRIC!! You got ENGAGED and forgot To TELL ME?!?”  
“What?!” he jerks on the couch.  
“OH.MY.GOD!!!!!! You are gonna be married!!!” she yells through the phone so high that Edward needs to distance himself from the receiver. “I’ve always bet on Al to be the first. And you didn’t tell me. You are terrible! Does Al know? Of course he does! When were you gonna tell me, uh?! Obviously, you told Mrs.Curtis. Is Al going to be back in time for the wedding? You better book a nice place in time, spring is the high season for marriages, or maybe you could do it in Resembol. Did you already tell Granny? God, how long have you kept this from me-”  
“WINRY!” he screams back, pissed.  
“Ohi! You don’t get to yell at me, I’m the mad one here! You could have told me sooner-”  
“We are not engaged!”  
Finally, a moment of silence. He lays back on the couch.  
“What?”  
Edward sights, touching his eyes, tiredly. “You misunderstood”  
Another silence. He can hear some voices and the shop’s bell in the background.  
“Edward, that’s why you are feeling off?” Winry asks in a worried voice.  
“What- No!”  
“Then-”  
“We ..never thought about it.” A lie. Almost.  
More silence.  
“I know that tone.”  
“What tone?”  
“You are not telling me something”  
Edward sights again. Why does she know him that well?  
“You thought about it, didn’t you? That’s it.” Edward shifts uncomfortably and begins to put the boot in the nearest pillow.  
“That’s. Complicated”  
“No, Ed, it’s not. Are you going to propose?” His face fires up at the question.  
“How- Proposing.. Winry, I am-“  
“What’s the problem?”  
The Problem. The Fucking Problem. Traded mark and the whole shit.  
“The Problem is that he has a brilliant future. He is good at doing what he does, and God knows if someone deserves to reach the top, that’s him. How am I supposed to ruin his chances by going public with him? And don’t tell me that’s not gonna happen because …you know..people can bear rumors but a public relationship is-”  
“Are you two still keeping it secret?”  
“Yeah..well, Roy would put on a fucking parade but-“  
“I told you I liked him. You are a moron”  
“You are supposed to take my side, you know that?”  
“There is no side here, beansprout. I think you chose a better person than one more interested in their career than in anything else. And Roy chose a good person, too. Just..sometimes he acts like an idiot. Besides, since when do you give a fuck about people? They are gonna talk, let them! But you have to trust you and Roy about be stronger than this.”  
“You sound just like him”  
“Well, if he says no you can ask me” Winry mocks him. Then, in a gentle voice. “Promise me that you’ll think about it Ed?”  
“I will”  
“Good”

 

Edward opens his eyes. He is sitting in his meditative position. Except the place, wherever this is, is totally void. Nobody in sight. More precisely, not a single thing. He bathed, ate something and headed for bed. How did he end up here?  
He gets up from the not-floor. "I am dreaming?" He walks forward for what seem a few minutes.  
"Is there someone?"  
That's when he feels his flesh arm warming up. He raises it, noticing that he's not wearing the leather armlet. He brings his fingers to brush the sensible skin. 

"Roy.." He murmurs.

That's when he starts hearing some other voices in the distance.

He increases his pace. "Where are you?"  
There is a woman speaking. Or a man too?

"Be a good boy"

Edward abruptly stops. Was it in his head? Must be. The voice is too clear as if there was someone next to him. And he realizes the landscape around him just changed. For as incredible as it must seem, the sun is  
warming up his skin and he can hear the sound of lapping water not far from him. A few meters from him a woman and a man are talking. His sight is a little unfocused, as if he were to wear someone else glasses.

"Who are you?" Edward tries to get their attention. They ignore him.  
"What do you want?". The two of them keep talking.  
".. will be able to choose-"  
“They won’t..” there is some other talking but he can’t hear well enough. It’s like listening at an untuned radio. It’s frustrating. "I don't understand!"

Then another male voice, right in his ear. “You don’t know”.

“WHAT?” He jerks surprised. There is no one else there, except for the couple in front of him. What the hell is going on? He looks around to find where the other voice is coming from, while the woman’s voice drifts apart echoing, “It’s gonna be ok. But you have to go now”. 

The surrounding dissolves like smoke and he is left standing in front of an engraved door in a white world.

“No..”

“Don’t you, now?”. That voice. The Gate is mocking him now “You have so much knowledge. Too much knowledge.” 

“No..”  
Not again.

He turns to run somewhere. Anywhere from that place. He stumbles, landing on a heap of snow.  
He withdraws for the shock. 

Roy is in front of him, a snow storm around them. Edward struggles to keep his eyes opened because of the weather. He closes them for a moment and when he opens them the scenery already went away. The no-place again. No more snow.

“They will get to you two. I have to try.” A man’s voice. “You don’t understand” the woman’s voice again. He doesn’t see her but recognizes the voice never the less. “What are you talking about? Who the hell are you?” They looked strangely familiar but he was sure. He didn’t know them.

Change of set, again. But this one, Edward knows far too well. The homunculus hideout. Roy is on the floor, bleeding to death. And fuck, one part of him knows that it already happened, that they made it. But the other one makes him move, rushing on the floor and repeating that hell all over again. He is using his shirt to stop the bleeding. Roy is looking at him and keeps talking. “Shut up!”  
“I used to play in the fields, not far from Central” “Don’t talk, you’re losing too much blood!”  
But Roy keeps talking, the blood keeps running and tinging the floor. “Do you know how much I love you? The woman’s voice comes again in his head. But it is Roy to answer, almost relieved. “A lot and more”. He looks at him one more time. And he is gone.

Edward opens his eyes abruptly breathing in. He is in their bedroom. It’s already bright outside. Roy is laid by his side, asleep. He must have arrived while he was asleep. 

He gives himself a moment to put himself together, let his heart the time he needs to come back functioning. As his breath slows down, he reaches to grab Roy’s shoulder and shake him. But the fabric of the pajama is sloppy, the shirt seems wet. He pulls the hand back while Roy turns at him, now awake. Edward looks down at his hand, bright red with blood. In a second his eyes run back to Roy, who is looking at him with steely eyes as he speaks with the Gate’s voice  
“Too.Much.Knowledge”

This time he wakes up in the dark, in that very same bedroom. Alone. And in utter despair.  
Somehow his heart has been constricting something in his throat because he can’t really manage to breath at a decent pace. He pounces on the other side of the bed looking for the lamp. 

Although, as soon as the room is to be seen, the dream slams back in his mind and he finds himself running in the bathroom just in time to throw up.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

It’s late that night when Olivier hears a quiet knocking at the door of her office.

 

“Come in”

 

“General Grumman’s here, M’am.”

 

“Let him in. You are dismissed.”

 

“Goodnight”

 

The guard lets him in, salutes and closes the door behind him.

 

“Thank you again for your hospitality, General Armstrong.” Grumman left his room a few minutes ago, adding his need for a good glass of whisky and a game of poker with Sloane as explanation. Mustang had been occupied with tons of work during the last few days and for as brilliant as always, the old man could tell there was something bothering him.

 

“Save your charms, Grumman. I know you all would have preferred lodging downhill.” He chuckles.

 

“What if someone finds out about your guest?” he points at the red scarf on the sofa.

 

“That’s their problem, not mine. They can talk about it with my sword.”

 

“I expected that much from the Northern Wall.” He replies cheerfully.  
He sits down and lights up a cigar. “Do you mind?”. She shakes her head and closes the files she had been signing when he arrived.

 

“What do you think?”

 

“It’s going as we planned. Even better. They all depend on him. You saw the tactical practice the other day.”

 

“I agree”.

 

“And whatever problem Mustang had with Arren, they solved it Saturday night. And Sloane is fine.”

 

“You are quite a matchmaker”

 

“Now he has the numbers. And the people.”

 

Then he adds with a serious glance.

 

“Months ago, I thought the decision was a little rushed, that Mustang could have used some other time. I was wrong.”

 

He got up while talking and approached the window, observing the storm infuriating around them.

 

“The matter now is-“, Armstrong hints.

 

“..yeah”. The storm rages against the windows.

 

She leans against the desk, observing the old general. They have never been close during Bradley’s reign, but during the last period they have been sharing experiences and a good measure of whisky over their evolving positions. All she knew before the Promised day was that he was assigned in the East and was  
Mustang’s former CO.

 

She finds herself asking, “Do you happen to know..”

 

“I do not.”

 

Silence follows. When he finally turns back at her, a smile has built up under his moustaches. “In the beginning, I thought you would have stood against this”. She has never been shy about her objectives.

 

“What happened during the last two years changed my prospective, in more than one way”. He slowly nods, sympathetic.

 

“He is meant to do this, Olivier. And Haruko gave us the chance to show the others what we already know.”

 

“I know. And if everything goes the way it’s going, we won’t need to do anything but watch it as it happens.”

 

“I agree.”

 

 

 

She enters her apartment and immediately gets rid of the uniform. The meeting with Grumman lasted longer than expected. Although, there were plenty of things to plan. The sooner the better. The thought of a hot shower has been tempting her since they got back from the camp. She lets the steam wrapping her body as she meditates on her conversation with Grumman.

 

_‘I thought you would have stood against this’_

 

Maybe. Maybe two years ago she would have been tempted. Then she saw what disrupted desires and thirst of power led them to. She quickly dries off, wearing something comfortable.

 

“Hi”. The door of the apartment closes and a tempting smell pervades the air.

 

“I brought something to eat.”

 

A thatch of white hair pops up, red eyes looking for her. Before she saved him in Central and offered him a place to stay during his recovery he was known as Scar. When they met he decided to give up his name, what it meant to him -the hate, the tragedies, the sorrow-. Giving up your name is worse than death to an Ishvalan. Last thing he expected was to be given a new name, let alone by an Amestrian. However, she did more than that.

 

He leaned to steal a kiss and headed back in the kitchen.

 

“You hided yourself again in my office the whole day, didn’t you? You left your scarf in there.” Olivier sits down on the sofa.

 

“Thank you”

 

“You shouldn’t hide, Ariel.”

 

“They wouldn’t be pleased.”

 

“Fuck them”

 

They eat peacefully and talk about their day.

 

In the beginning, she decided to help him. The Military ruined so many lives -and his life- and she had been a part of that government, no matter her own actions. The Ishvalans needed him back and she was willing to help. Help soon turned into friendship during the recovery, and then into something totally unexpected. On both sides.

 

“You should meet with Mustang. I can arrange it. There will be a big number of surprises in the next weeks. I don’t want you to be one of them.”

 

“Don’t you think he might be unwilling to meet the man who tried to kill him?”

 

“I don’t.”

 

“Fine then.”

 

“There is something else”. She adds almost immediately. Ariel raises an eyebrow, curious. A malicious smile builds up on her face. “Please, don’t be too smug when you tell him you managed to get into my pants”.

 

He smiles back a little too pleased by her words and kisses her neck.

 

“I will try not to.”

 

 

 

By the time Roy hears Grumman coming back into their bedroom it’s half past two. He himself preferred to dodge another evening of poker and headed for bed. He slept for three hours at most when he slowly woke up, sweating and feeling strangely off.

 

Grumman is coming in when he realizes his roommate is still up.

 

“Roy, I thought you were already asleep by now”

 

“I was. How was the poker?”

 

“Sloane let me down. But the guys from the kitchen have been a good company tonight”

 

Roy stands up and enters the bathroom. He lets the water run and washes his face, in need of some relief.

 

Grumman followed him and is now observing him a little more carefully. “Are you ok?”

 

“Not really, I..”

 

He feels dizzy. His balance is clearly off because he needs to lean against the wall. The older man approaches and grabs him by one shoulder. He is still looking at him, concern showing for once behind his glasses.

 

“You turned white, Roy. You should sit down for a moment.”

 

And he does. He stays there for a goon minute but it doesn’t get any better.

 

And then a cold shower hits his nerves and he has the time to move toward the bin, before mercilessly throwing up his dinner. Grumman keeps talking but he is not listening to what he is saying.

 

 

 

_Edward_

 

 

  
He must have had a panic attack.

 

“How are you feeling?” He finally makes a sense of what Grumman is saying.

 

“Like shit” Roy answers sincerely. But then it occurs to him how it must seem odd to a stranger’s eyes what just happened, all of sudden. So he hurries to add “Something I hate at dinner. Probably.”

 

Why would Edward have a panic attack? Would the others contact him if something happened to him?

 

“I am feeling good. But I told you that soup you took at dinner had a strange color. It must be it. You shouldn’t trust something so orange.”

 

“I have to agree.” Roy fights with the aftershock of his attack.

 

“Take your time. Don’t drink anything, tough. I’ll ask someone of the boys to bring some bread for later.”

 

“Thank you”

 

An hour passes. One of the boys working in the kitchens brings them a tray with some bread and hot tea.

 

Grumman looks at him for a moment. “You don’t have a good look, boy. Maybe you should stay in tomorrow.”

 

“No, I’m fine” Roy hurries to respond him. Tomorrow is supposed to be the last day of their exercitation. He is supposed to be there instead of Haruko for the conclusive speech.

 

“Mhmh” Grumman lets out unconvinced by his words and comes back in the bedroom to get changed.

 

“Did they restore the communication?” Roy asks after a few minutes, still sitting down on the floor of the bathroom.

 

“Still cut out” Grumman walks in shaking his head. “but don’t worry, my dear niece is clever enough to run the entire country without your assistance.”

 

Roy tries to smile, “I’m sure of it”. Actually, it isn’t Riza he is aiming to get in contact as soon as possible.

 

“You know..” Grumman seizes him once again, “..there are rumors going on that General Mustang got his head together and is thinking about settling down”

 

“Is that so?” Roy mocks him. It’s not that surprising. He stopped taking out the Madam’s girls soon after the Promised Day. They concorded a new plan to keep their intelligence network on. He could have dated Edward in public after everything settled down, but he worried too much about Roy’s carrier.

 

Gossip in Central is the rule and there is just one possible explanation for his change of routine. Despite Edward’s efforts.

 

“If there is someone you should get in contact with, we can always send a private..”

 

“No, no, it’s nothing. Besides, we are leaving in a couple days.” They share a good minute of silence, until Grumman breaks it with a sight. “Not an old grumpy man, but please tell me it’s not Riza.”

 

Roy’s head twists to face him properly, “What? Of course she isn’t! She is a sister to me”

 

“Thank God”

 

Roy scowls at him.

 

“Don’t get me wrong but ..you are not the right man for her. She needs someone able to cheer her up.”

 

“Mhm” he lets out, intentionally sounding offended.

 

“So..who’s the lucky one?”

 

“Going to bed now”. He is in no mood to eat anything. Let alone talking about his love life.

 

“You see? You need someone to cheer you up, too”.

 

They lay down and turn off the lights.

 

Silence.  
Blessed silence.

 

He feels better now, even if still pretty shaken by what happened. It must be it. Edward had a panic attack and he shared it through the bond. After all, after they got their marks Edward never had any crisis. Neither he did have nightmares nor bad nights. He mentally kicks himself one more time for being stuck in the middle of nowhere. He sights, pissed.

 

Roy thought to be safe but then he hears Grumman murmuring in a quieter voice.

 

“I’ve been married for forty years. I wish you, whoever they are, that they will make you happy as I have been with my wife.”

 

Silence again. Roy sights again.

 

“They do”

 

“Rest now, we have work to do tomorrow”

 

 

Except, Roy’s still a little too awake and lets his mind wander in the darkness of their room.

 

Grumman unknowingly hit a hot spot.

 

After all, Roy has always been a hopeless romantic. The way he feels for Edward exceeds whatever feeling he could ever feel – and ever felt –for somebody else and he knows, deep in is heart, what is coming next.

 

He knows every time he gets across a couple walking down the street, every time he hears the Fuhrer talking over the phone with his wife. He knows when he comes back from work and finds Edward waiting for him on the couch. He knows when they are lying in bed, Edward in his arms, so warm and perfect.

 

Although, Edward’s worries about his career prevented them from going public and he could never propose to him and expecting to keep going on hiding. It is not sane, and above all it is not fair for none of them.

 

There was a moment, there in the garden, the night before he left for Briggs, when he has been tempted by bringing up the subject. But he also recognized that the timing wasn’t exactly perfect and he wasn’t willing to sabotage a nice evening.

 

He is thirty-two and it could still take some years before making to the rank of Fuhrer, if it all goes as planned. And so many things could go wrong. He needs to consider every possible scenario. But he can’t accept the idea of living in secret forever. He knows that he would choose Edward over the chance to be Fuhrer. In a second. He told Edward, too. And now he is General. A fine goal, all considered.

 

He is going to wait for a few weeks, the time for things to settle down after the promotion, and then he is going to propose. He decided it the day Haruko communicated him the decision. There is no need to wait.

 

Despite his nerves, Roy gives a hint of a smile in the darkness.

 

He brought the ring days ago. And he needed to keep it hidden from Edward, afraid that he might find it by chance and go crazy.

 

A little voice in his head suggests that Edward is going to be mad no matter what.

 

At least, it’s gonna be worth it, he lets himself think as he finally gives up to sleep.

 

 

 

Next morning Roy wakes up at the feeling of a hand on his shoulder. Grumman.

 

“Fuck” he moans.

 

“Well, now. Where are your manners?” Grumman smirks surprised, more amused than anything. He’s already dressed.

 

“I’m late!” he rushes up.

“No, you are not. You are not expected on the field today. Armstrong is waiting for you in her office in an hour. Said stuff about some papers..”.

 

As he gets prepared, Roy wonders if it has to do with what happened last night. Grumman probably planned it all while he was still asleep. Some things never change.

 

He walks down the almost desert hallways. Just a few soldiers from the base. Everyone else is outside, joining the exercitations.

 

He knocks at Olivier’s office. “Come in”

 

“Good morning”

 

“What do I owe the pleasure?”

 

“Would you prefer to enjoy the weather outside?” She mocks him. “Not at all.” “I thought so”. She picks up the phone, dials a number and hangs up after a few seconds.

 

“Mustang, the Exercitation were planned to end tomorrow. Since the weather is still acting up I have no idea if you all will be able to leave right away. This year, I must say, it was good. Really good.”

 

“Yes, it was. Even if I probably prefer those in the East. I can’t hold up with this temperature.”

 

Her eyes sparkle amused. “I will hold that against you.” Roy’s is about to ask what for when she adds, “There is someone you need to meet.”

 

And there it comes a knock at the door.

 

“Here he is”. Someone comes in.

 

And Scar is standing in front of him. In Olivier Armstrong’s office, the heart of Briggs.

 

Roy takes a step forward, observing him.

 

“Well. ..I’d say to be totally surprised. But I would lie”. He never believed Scar died in the fight against Bradley, despite what the official news reported. And during that famous trip in the East with Edward he overheard some villagers talking about a wandering man who had been helping the Ishvalan communities nearby.

 

“Although, if I were to guess, I’d have expected to meet you among your people, in the East.”

 

“I have kept moving. We appreciate everything you have done for giving us a home again.”

 

“I did nothing”. Still, he didn’t explain his presence here.

 

“So, what’s your role in all of this?” he asks Olivier, who hasn’t spoken yet.

 

Scar anticipates her “She saved me.” Roy is about to ask him what happened but Scar doesn’t let him. “She gave me a new name. The man you knew as Scar died that day. My name is Ariel now. – he pauses- I want to help my people, and I know you are in the position to do so. I made choices that I regret, and I can only hope you all will be able to forgive me in time. That’s mankind’s curse. We can’t change the past but future is ours to create. I thought there was no meaning in it, but I was wrong. Your golden friend and Mrs.Rockbell showed me.”

 

For once Roy is left without words. He fixes that right away.

 

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I am the one who need to make up for what I’ve done. And you are right. We can’t but looking back with one eye and moving forward, working hard to make things better. That’s what I want to do, with your help. And everyone else’s. “

 

He offers his hand to Scar.

 

And Scar offers his own.

 

“Well, now that you are done, you will stop hiding in here. Will you?”

 

Scar huffs.

 

The Ishvalan probably arrived here sooner than Roy himself and waited for the right moment to meet him. Which brings up his next question. “I mean no offence but, did you come up here in the middle of nowhere just to tell me this?”

 

“Come on, Mustang. The world doesn’t turn around you.” She bursts, then grabs handful of Scar’s, no Ariel’s shirt and ..she is kissing him. He leans forward, like if what just happened wasn’t the most surreal thing that happened in front of Roy’s eyes – ever- but just routine.

 

“See you later” she practically purrs. Than freezes Roy with another glare.

 

“Put that jaw at work, Mustang. You look like an idiot “, and exit the room.

 

The two men look at each other for an embarrassing long moment.

 

“So..you two..”

 

“Yeah”

 

“Mhmh”

 

He guesses the Ishvalan is the only person in the whole country able to manage her, after all.

 

“That was totally unexpected” Roy hears himself saying.

The Ishvalan gives in to a laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? They are perfect for each other, aren't they?


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usal, no beta. So if i messed up with grammar or common sense, please let me know (_ _*)  
> this chapter is longer than usual. I'll be posting within a few days. I have some dresses etc. to tailor by the end of February but I am writing a lot these days so it shouldn't be a problem ^^  
> Thank you for all the comments and kudos <3

Edward called the colleagues in Investigation and Riza to let them know he was taking the day off, planning to spend the rest of the day couching at home.

 

It wasn’t the panic per se to worry him. On the other hand, the dream gave him plenty to think about. He heard about lucid dream several times but this is the first time it seems to be a real possibility. Could it be related with their marks?

 

He curls up with his blanket on the couch, ruminating on it. The way the mark warmed up, seeing Roy. And those two. He is almost certain to have seen them before somewhere. But who were they?

 

The Gate? Sure, those were his demons. But the other stuff?

 

The snow. Feeling it. It couldn’t be a coincidence.

 

The last part of the dream, he can’t even..

 

He sights once more and gets up to look at the clock. Eleven o’clock

 

There is no use in staying there. Sleep is not coming and he might as well get some job done, despite the nerves. Maybe he can do that with the others in their office. It’s just papers after all. And he hasn’t seen them in days, except for Jean.

 

By the time he gets there it’s lunch time, Edward realizes. He hasn’t eat anything since last evening. But his stomach isn’t really interested at the moment. So he dodges the cafeteria and gets upstairs instead.

 

He grabs the handle and opens the door when his brain decides to mess with him in the funniest way ever. He tries to close and open his eyes one more time, just in case. Same view.

 

Jean and Riza.

 

Making out.

 

Against the desk.

 

He would turn back unseen and run, run far away from here..  
.. if it wasn’t for the fact that the door creak already gave him away.

 

Edward can just wait for three unbearably long seconds, just how much it takes for them to break apart and realize what just happened.

 

One..

 

Two..

 

“Shit” Havoc spits up, slamming a hand on his mouth almost immediately.

 

Edward’s brain is still on standby because he can’t think about anything to say back. He just stares back, his hand still on the handle.

 

Havoc looks at Riza, then back to Edward.

 

“Ehm..Boss, listen that’s not what it-“ the older man tries to gain back some kind of relaxed attitude.

 

“Jean” Riza softly calls him, shaking her head.

 

Edward is still looking at the both of them in awe.

 

“You said you were dating someone” Edward stupidly notices out loud. Havoc nods, itching his neck nervously.

 

“You said it was serious”

 

He should probably shut the fuck up because he could end up being shot by Riza. Or making Havoc die of embarrassment. And Riza shouting him for having killed him.

 

“Edward” Riza calls him. “It wasn’t our intention to keep it hidden from anyone. We just needed a little time to..sort things out. Could you give us just a little time? I promise you I’ll tell Roy myself.”

 

Silence.

 

“Because he doesn’t know” Jean adds.

 

“Because he doesn’t know” Edward echoes. “Because he doesn’t..”.

 

He starts laughing so hard that Riza and Havoc both look at him in disbelief.

 

“He has no idea. _Oh my god_ ” he closes the door and leans back catching his breath.

 

“Please, just tell me when you are gonna do it. I wanna be there and see his face the moment he realizes. The moron.” And he bursts into laughs again.

 

Havoc is about to laugh himself but after an exasperate glare from Riza thinks better and simply shrugs, taking her hand instead.

 

“Do we have a deal?” Riza asks, a bright smile on her lips despite her efforts.

 

“Sure. And by the way, congratulation. I’m very happy for you both.” He adds, sincere.

 

Havoc grins like the lucky idiot he is. Riza is observing him instead. “Why are you here Ed? I thought you would have spent the day home”.

 

“Yeah, well. I am feeling better and I had some paperwork to do anyway..so..I thought to keep you guys some company”

 

“I’ll get something to eat for everyone, then.” Havoc announces and gives him a pack on the shoulder before exiting the room.

 

“Can I use his desk?” Edward finds himself asking without even realizing.

 

“Sure” Riza smiles at him warmly.

 

He ends up spending the rest of the day there, dealing with his reports. In the afternoon Breda passes by offering to bring something to eat but he refuses.

 

Soon after he arrived he decided to light some fire, feeling cold to the bone. Probably the after-effects of the night.

 

It should be strange. He spent years on the other side of the desk.

 

God, if they only knew what was coming for them. . The bad things, yeah. But the good ones, too.

 

His mind keeps replaying the conversation with Winry and why everything in their lives must be so difficult.

Couldn’t he just go out with Roy, a nice evening from now and then? Not those fancy places next to Command..some quiet pub, or -he would die before admitting it out loud- a dance hall and spend the night twirling on the floor. And one night, going out and making it something special and then ..how is he supposed to do it? Putting the damn ring in a flute of champagne or-

 

“Edward?”

 

He raises his eyes with the blood thundering in his hears. Riza is in front of him, a worried look on her face. He hasn’t even idea of what hour it is.

 

“What? Did something happen?” he rushed to ask, getting up from the chair.

 

“No, no. Don’t worry” she speaks slowly. He sits back down and takes a look outside. The sun already set down.

 

“Edward, I think you should go home. You look like you could use some rest. You shouldn’t push yourself this way.” She sounds concern.

 

He frowns. “Uh?”

 

“You spent the day in here and didn’t eat anything” she sights “Jean told me you barely eat anything yesterday, too”.

 

“Not hungry”. She seizes him, taking a few more step toward the desk.

 

“Did you talk about it with Doctor Knox?”

 

“Nah. We already know what’s all about.” He waves his hand between them. “I just..” he covers his face, giving up to hide the stress consuming him.

 

“Go home. If we’re lucky, he’ll be back soon.”

 

 

A couple hours later, Edward is brushing his wet hair, admitting he would gladly become one thing with the bed. Although, after last night surprise he can’t even consider it. The thought is still too vivid in his mind. He might as well try to read something in the studio. The armchair will do. He takes his mug, a couple of cookies and migrates toward the other room.

 

The studio isn’t smaller than the other rooms in the house, but has been furnished with ceiling-scrapping bookshelves and a small table by the French window. On the opposite side, a grey armchair. Edward retrieves the yellow plaid in the basket next the door and cuddles himself on it, turning on the lamp. There is a phone in there, so he can pick it up from here if he needs to.

 

Roy was supposed to be home but Briggs is still cut out because of the snow. In the afternoon Fuery informed him that they would have delay the return. God, why the hell did Haruko sent him in the fucking North to begin with?! There was someone lazier than him after all. Not that he is going to tell him.

 

The lamp enlightens the dozens of volumes stuffed on the shelves.

 

A part of him knows that this is a part, an important one, of Roy’s job. And the fact Haruko placed his trust in him says a lot about his role in the Military. Egoistically though, he can’t help wishing him home.

 

After reading for a while, he decides to write to Al again. He sent the last letter just days ago but he feels the need to talk to him. Being unable to do so, paper is all he has. Words come out as easily as if Al was in front of him.

 

The thin rain turns into a violent storm as the hours passes, timing Edward’s night. The rustling storm screams outside. He tries to convey on paper all the things running through his mind.

 

_Al,_

  
_I hope everything is fine. I’ve just sent you a letter but I didn’t wait for your answer and here I am again._

_Teacher invited me during the weekend. And we had The Talk. Honestly, I might have been a little melodramatic when I suggested to start planning my funeral. She didn’t kill me after all but I kinda fainted in the kitchen Saturday night and she got worried and shit. Ok, not fainted, fainted. I think something happened to Roy in the North. Nothing bad, because I would have known. Wouldn’t I? I think I’m going crazy. I can’t speak with him because the lines are still interrupted -fucking snow and I have no idea of what’s going on. Fuck. Maybe I’m just tired and I’ll destroy this letter the moment I finish writing._

 

_Also, about weird stuff, there is something I’ve been thinking about lately and the other day I talked with Winry and-_

 

 

There is a metal sound at the entrance.

 

Edward lets go of pen, blanket and all of it to jump on his feet at once.

 

He hears he door being unlocked.

 

_Roy_

 

His heart jumps in his throat as he walks out of the room and down the aisle. He should be running, but his body decides to keep it calm.

 

In fact, Roy is standing in the entrance, luggage in his hands. Soaked. The blue uniform turned black and is dripping water all over the floor.

 

Roy seems to be lost in his thoughts but then he hears Edward’s steps on the wooden floor and raises his head. Dark blue eyes are framed by wet strays of ebony hair. The intensity of his glare makes Edward’s heart jump another beat.

 

He went through these last days and felt so miserable not having him by his side.

 

He moves toward the other man, slowly. The rain is deafening. He stops a few meters from Roy. He is about to speak, but something about his voice must be off because all he can manage is smiling.

 

For a moment, Roy keeps his eyes on him, not moving a muscle like if he is expecting for him to run away or God knows what. Then, without notice nor care, he lets go the luggage on the floor. He is soaked, the hair stick on his forehead and his boots make a mess as he rushes toward Ed without a word and traps him in his arms. Tightly.

 

The young alchemist is still processing the other’s actions but his body knows better. His arms move in a rush to welcome Roy. He is home.

 

“Not breathing here” Edward tries to diffuse some tension, even if he feels his legs turn into jelly at the contact. God, the past days without Roy have really been a torture.

 

But there is something else, too.

 

The grab doesn’t loosen and Edward realizes Roy is shaking.

 

“Roy, you are going to catch a cold if-“ but can’t go ahead with what is saying because the other man broke apart just as much as needed to assault his mouth, a little too roughly for his standards. Edward’s eyes go wide with surprise as a moan escapes from him.

 

Relief hits him as strong as a train, followed by a strong taste of distress and ..how can it be that he can register a certain feeling as..starving? Homesickness? He wraps his arms around the other’s neck, eyes closing. Roy’s hair under his hands are wet but he doesn’t care.

 

Roy pushes him against the nearest wall and pins him there, working his way in Edward’s mouth. Water runs from his head down Edward’s cheeks. His pajama is dumping from the contact with Roy’s soaked uniform. But neither of them seems to bother as they get used to each other touches again.

 

When Roy breaks apart Edward is not sure is if being pissed by the interruption or delighted, because Roy doesn’t move an inch and brushes his cheeks with both shaky hands and breath. He lowers to reclaim another kiss and Edward tries to make him pull out the coat at least. It doesn’t work. Roy is still on the verge of whatever panic is possessing him (or them?). His trembling is just as bad as before.

 

“ _Shh, shh_. I’m here” Edward murmurs, trying to comfort him. Roy just pushes him harder against the wall

 

His hands run down his torso to find Edward’s hips. He is still wearing the gloves, wet with rain. The grip tightens and Edward loses contact with the floor.

 

Roy’s weight keeps him anchored to the wall until the raising friction between their body and their tongues becomes too intense to be bared alone.

 

Edward’s moans of pleasure make Roy realize they both want more than a few stolen moments right there.

 

And Roy finally finds the will to move further into their house, walking down the aisle with Edward in his arms.

 

 

 

When Edward opens his eyes, it must be past eight in the morning. Roy is still sleeping beside him. He has dark shadows under his eyes as well -unsurprisingly- but a warm shade of pink livens up his cheek. They are still gloriously naked since last night. Roy is spooning him and Edward just need to roll over to plant a loud kiss on his lips just for the sake of waking him up.

 

Part of him still lives to piss off Roy whenever he gets the chance. Years had passed and he’s an adult now. That said, he found out original ways to carry on his tradition. Months ago, he thought it would be funny to try this new discipline coming from Xing, which involved practising movements in order to improve your inner self or some bullshit. Except he kept exercising the various positions in front of Roy, leaning forward, stretching and moaning for the effort. He was far too aware of the effect his acrobatics produced, just in the same way Roy knew which was the real purpose and accepting the dare by ignoring him. They lasted two days and half.

 

"Mhm" Roy tries his best to open his eyes but after a quick peek he closes them.

 

"Ed" he murmurs hoarsely.

 

"You ok?” The other asks, landing his flesh hand on Roy's cheek. “You are hot”. He felt the skin’s heat as soon as he got closer.

 

Roy can't help a grin. “Am I?” he murmurs. His eyes are still dimmed when Edward's lips connect with his forehead.

Hot is an understatement. He is a fucking stove. “Hell..”, he touches his cheek again and then slides down to the neck. He’s sweating.

 

"You've got fever"

 

"I've got fever" Roy repeats a little dumbly. But Edward is already on the move.

 

"Let's put something on". He retrieves his own clothes and a pajama for Roy, before moving him in the guest room despite the other’s soft complaining, mostly because.. clean sheets. He gives him some antipyretic -which is kind of funny all considered - and glares at him.

 

"Don't get up. And yes that is an _order_. I am calling at work; then you are stuck with me the whole day."

 

Roy sleeps for good part of the morning. Edward tidy up the mess from last night and ordered some take away brot from the restaurant at the end of the block because there was no way he could leave him alone. Not in this state and not after being alone for almost ten days.

 

“Hi”

 

Edward raises his eyes to look at Roy, now definitely awake. He has been reading by his bedside to keep his mind occupied.

 

“Hi”. He leaves the book on the chair and sits on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling?”, asks checking once more the forehead. It seems better now. By evening it will probably raise again a little.

 

“Heavenly”. Roy raises up a little, sitting in the bed.

 

“Moron.”

 

“I missed you too.” Edward feels his cheeks firing up. He should be used to these stuff by now. He sights.

 

“Are you ok?” Roy asks brushing his eyeshadows with a thumb and carefully observing him in the daylight.

 

“I didn’t get a lot of sleep since you left” Edward admits. He leans into the touch and Roy’s hand travels down his neck, cuddling him. Roy nods, comprehensive, even if his concern is evident.

 

“I should have insisted to dry you off last night.” Edward curses himself out loud. If they did, he wouldn’t be ill by now.

 

“It’s not like that” Roy looks him in the eyes. “I don’t think it would have made any difference”

 

Edward frowns so he continues calmly.

 

"I might have walked through the snow all the way down Briggs"

 

"You WHAT?"

 

"And then I arrived here and was raining and.."

 

"Why the hell did you rolled over the snow-"

 

"You had a panic attack" the other explains, eyes filled with worry. "I flew at the first chance. Once I gave the speech they really didn’t need me anymore. The other were waiting for the streets to turn back accessible but I... What happened, Ed?”

 

"I didn't..It was a nightmare ..but how!.. Oh.” He rapidly gets to his conclusion.

 

“Mhm. I was in Grumman’s company at least. He thought I had a stomach ache.” He shrugs. “He is never going to trust Northern soups again, thanks to me.”

 

“That sucks. I’m s-”

 

“Don’t apologize. I was worried as well and I couldn’t reach you-”

 

“You are an idiot. You could have waited with the others”

 

“Nope”

 

Edward rolls his eyes. “Do you feel like eating something?”

 

Roy’s features soften with affection, “Did you cook?”

“Fuck no, it’s take away from _Gilda’s_. You don’t deserve my food when you do stupid things like these.” Edward piles on it. “Besides, there is not that much in the fridge. I’ll buy something tomorrow morning.”

 

Roy comes downstairs to eat and then insist to call the Fuhrer to inform him about the Exercitations.

 

When he comes back upstairs, his eyes came back glassy, giving away his condition.

 

Edward pilots him toward their bedroom and hands him a glass of water and some more medicines.

 

“What did he say?”

 

Roy shrugged. “He is satisfied with everything. He is receiving reports from Briggs and from the other generals as well. It seems this year was a success. He told me to take my time. He doesn’t want to see me in the office before Tuesday.”

 

“Good” Edward grins, laying down next to him, but above the covers. But then Roy sights, like if he is thinking over it. Or like if there is something bothering him.

 

"Roy..did something else happened? To you, I mean"

 

He thought about the reaction Roy had to his nightmare while he was at the phone with the Fuhrer and that made sense. Every day they were discovering new details about their bonds and how they worked. It makes only sense to assume that something analogue happened to him, too.

 

"What about me?"

 

"I..Teacher invited me over for the weekend. Saturday night I was there and I sort of..blanked out."

 

He can feel Roy jolt at the news. "Are you-"

 

"I'm fine. But it was you, wasn't it?"

 

Something flickers in Roy’s glance.

 

"Ah" Saturday night. The banquet.

 

"A man approached me, pretended to know my parents. Things about them" He explains from the beginning. The painting, what the man told him and his strange reaction. He could feel Edward going from confusion to anger and real concern.

 

“He..he was gone before I could interrogate him further. Said it was not safe talking there.”

 

He is looking at nothing in particular, too focused on remembering every detail of that conversation and gaining nothing more than he did the tens of times he already replayed it in his head. But then Edward is grabbing his shoulder to get his attention and his eyes are back on him.

 

“Were you by your own?”

 

“Yes, I was. A butler showed up after a few minutes, and he was gone.”

 

Edward gets up and runs a hand over his mouth in the attempt to calm down. And elaborating.

 

“No matter what, you have to be under my or Riza’s sight from now on.” Edward’s words are almost metallic, calculated. He has passed on defense mood and it took him just the blink of an eye.

 

“Don’t worry. I am perfectly able to defend mys-”

 

“I know that!” Edward jerks back. He pinches the brick of the nose. “You have to consider you are a General now. You are more at risk than before. People might try to lure you into a trap by telling you tales. Please just promise me.”

 

“I do. And as you said, they are probably just lies. He knew my mother’s name but everyone could get it through my papers, right?”

 

Edward doesn’t buy it for a second but last thing he wants now is piling on it.

 

“Mhm.”

 

Roy lays back with a huff, staring at the ceiling, thoughtful. Edward lays down again, observing him.

 

“Want to talk about it”

 

“About what?” The older man murmurs, a bit confused.

 

“Your..parents. I mean, it’s ok. If you don’t. But..if you want, I am here.”

 

Roy keeps staring at it as he speaks calmly.

 

“They lived here in Central. Mum worked as bartender in my aunt’s pub and knew my father there. When I was born, they decided to move in the country, not far from here. To raise me up. I was four years old when they died in a car accident. I don’t remember them that much..”

 

“I am sorry”

 

“Don’t be. I have some flashbacks, from time to time. Fragments. My mum’s hair whenever she picked me up, playing with my father. A trip maybe? But my aunt and the other girls, they raised me.” He turns toward the younger man with a genuine smile on his face.

 

“They did a good job” Edward suggest with a fond voice. Roy’s glance becomes more malicious.

 

“And they taught me a lot of useful tricks” Roy murmurs, moving his fingers on the mattress.

 

“Stop it, you perv” Edward scowls but can’t help a grin. “You need to rest”. Then he flicks, gets a look to the clock and curses.

 

“What is it?” Roy asks curious.

 

“I was supposed to go out with Russel and Philip tonight. A scientist presenting a new book. I am gonna call them now.”

 

“No way. It’s just fever. Go out and have some fun”

 

“But-“

 

“No buts. You never get to do something outside the office. You should go. I ‘ll be fine.” He reassures him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised you, didn't I? 
> 
> Well, fasten your feels' belts.
> 
> I guess.

“And then he told me it could be interesting to apply it in one research he’s planning to do within next year and-“

 

“And you proposed to envelope with each other”. Edward comments.

 

“Excuse me Elric, if I’m trying to make you appreciate _some real_ science” Russel fights back. He makes sticks his tongue out, “You are a jerk”

 

“Dickhead”

 

“Are you two always that lovable with each other?” Philip wonders out loud. They are walking on the sidewalk, toward Headquarters. It’s later than planned but neither of them really paid attention to it, too captivated by the presentation and the debate.

 

The two blondes look him up and down before declaring in synch, “Fuck you”

 

Russel gets along strangely well with Philip despite having just met him. He would probably stay a little longer if he hadn’t had to come back home to his little brother.

 

“He always says it’s fine but I know he won’t go to sleep until I’m back. You know” He adds as excuse to Ed, who nods sympathetically.

 

A taxi is passing by and they manage to call it for Russel. He waves his hand from behind the glass, a big smile. And he is gone.

 

“Mind for a little walk?” Philip proposes quietly. “Or do you prefer a cab yourself?”

 

“Nah, let’s walk.”

 

The air is still umid from rain, but it spared them so far. The temperature is no longer warm, shadowing the upcoming autumn. The lampposts keep company to the few windows still lighted up as they walk. Not far away from them there must be a pub, or a party because some music comes to ear. They talk about the evening while a few cars pass by, probably heading home from the conference.

 

They have just turned the corner when something brushes against Edward’s face, making him sputter.

 

“What the hell” he spills out.

 

“What is it?” Philip stopped by his side. They are almost in front of the Headquarters.

 

“A web”.

 

The other man laughs and joins him in trying to get rid of it.

 

Why the hell he has to catch a web in the middle of the city? It gets enough shit like this when he is the country on mission, or back in Resembol.

 

Philip has raised his hand to pick one last piece. Except, he brushes his cheek and cups it, closing up the distance between them. Edward’s brain freezes, but not enough to prevent him from moving away from the touch. He really didn’t see it coming.

 

“Philip?”

 

His eyes must be showing all his disbelief because Philip stills as well and takes a step back.

 

“You didn’t even consider it.” He breaths out a laugh that sounds like a defeat. “That I was interested”

 

“Philip, I had no idea-“. God, how could he be so oblivious to it? He’s usually good at reading people except he didn’t thought there was something to read. But Philip is speaking again.

 

“Because he’s fucking you” He looks up at him, clarifying.

 

“Mustang”

 

Edward feels the blood draining away from his face. From his whole body. Nevertheless, he tries to put on some façade. “I don’t know what you are-“

 

“Please Ed. Cut it off. It’s not like I’m gonna sell the news first thing in the morning”.

 

Edward’s hands tights for the tension, his mind running through every moment they spent together in the laboratories, but finding anything that could give him away that easily.

 

“How?” he murmurs somewhere between nervous and resigned. Philip moves closer to the bench next to them and sits down, spread legs and hands on his face.

 

“Some things didn’t fit. The other day, when your friend popped up, he must have read it all over my face.” He shakes his head. “When he told me you were still working for Mustang. Your eyes. That’s all it got. That comment you made about feeling off..I checked that evening. Mustang was in North City. And the fact you never talk about your home, or your private life. It all made sense.”

 

“What is it? It’s some kind of benefit? Do you think you owe him because-“

 

“Oh, _come on_ -“ Edward curses, more to himself than to Philip. He kicks the ground in the attempt to vent. Of course that was the conclusion everyone would have jumped to after knowing the truth.

 

“You fell for him..”. Edward looks away, unable to deny it. There’s no point.

 

“Edward, everyone knows it, Mustang is a womanizer. Even if now the people seem to have fallen for him too, it doesn’t mean he’s changed. Let it alone, he has a career. You saw it. He will make you unhappy. He is gonna choose something else, someone else. You don’t deserve anything of it. Just.. you didn’t considered ..this.. -says waving his hand in the empty space between them - but give it a try. I could never-“

 

“Philip” Edward reduces him to silence and weights his next words very carefully, “I do admire you, I really do. And I came to think of you as a good friend. That’s why I need you to listen to me because of what I’m telling you right now. You are wrong. And that’s ok. You care about me and..you see us from the outside: a boy, his older officer, the gossip and you think you know all of it. But it’s not. I am sorry, I really am, that I didn’t realize”.

 

“He makes me happy Philip. I love him. Please don’t think bad of me-”

 

“I could never think bad of you.”

 

“..or him.”

 

Philip remains silent for a good minute but when he speaks, he doesn’t comment on it. Instead he asks, “Are you gonna quit the Labs because of me?”

 

“Do you want me to?”

 

“No. I mean, just..don’t leave because of me.”

 

“I’m not going to. I really meant it before. You are a good friend.”

 

Philip looks away, mixed feelings passing on his face. He needs some time alone to clear his head. That’s the least Edward can do right now.

 

“I am going now. See you on Monday. Ok?”

 

“Right. Yes, I mean. See you Ed.”

 

 

 

When Edward enters the bedroom it’s late and Roy is asleep, knocked off by fever and medicines. He hopes it will be gone by the end of the week end. He changes in his pajamas before joining him and silently nestling up to Roy.

 

He should be panicking, despite Philip’s promise to keep it quiet. He doesn’t doubt him, but he can’t help to worry about the consequences for Roy. Instead he falls asleep with another thought. Saying he loved Roy out loud, to someone else, was so easy and so empowering at the same time, that he would gladly become addicted to it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next morning Roy feels better, which is great because they can have a couple of days for being them at home instead of running up and down the Headquarters. In fact, they hadn’t really had much time to spend together since the promotion. Roy updates him on the mission in the North, telling him about the other generals and the soldier’s exercitations. The way his eyes gleam while explaining it is amazing. When Edward asks about General Armstrong’s temper, Roy struggles to repress a laugh.

 

“What?”

 

“What what?”, Roy blinks innocently.

 

“You are hiding something.”

 

“You became so much better at reading me.”

 

“Don’t change the subject. I’ll find out anyway.”

 

“I don’t doubt it.” Roy mocks him from the other side of the couch. Not that he is going to reveal what he discovered about Olivier so easily. “But I am meaning it. Don’t you feel like-“

 

“-the mark is getting stronger?” Edward anticipates him. Under the plaid, his foot is gently fighting with Roy’s. He is winning.

 

Roy exhales a laugh, raising an eyebrow at the evidence.

 

Edward goes further, “It’s like a muscle, gaining strength over exercise. The more you use it, the-“

 

“more it becomes powerful”.

 

“Exactly” Edward grins. But the grin shades away quickly enough for Roy to notice.

 

“What is it?”

 

“The nightmare..”, Edward is thinking out loud, looking in the air, “I was dreaming but it was different from the other times. Mixed up.” Roy frowns.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I saw you. In Briggs. Felt the snow on my skin. And..- he pauses- and I saw a couple. They were arguing. But the conversation..I couldn’t understand all of it. The woman said something about choosing and trying to avoid something. I don’t know. I didn’t recognize the place, but it felt familiar all the same. So I have been thinking..what if they were your dreams?”

 

“You think we shared it” Roy wonders in astonishment.

 

“Mhhm”

 

They think about it for a minute.

 

“What were they like? The people you saw”, Edward hears Roy asking.

 

He recollects the scattered images of that night. “I couldn’t see them that well. The woman had light brown hair, this long -he touches his chest to show him the lenght – white dress, a beautiful broch on the belt. The man was dark-haired, probably Xingan, I’m not sure though. Brown trousers and a white shirt”

 

Roy’s foot stopped playing hide and seek.

 

“You saw them”

 

“Do you know them?”

 

“You saw my parents, Ed” Roy says with a soft smile. If Edward didn’t know better he would almost miss the crack in Roy’s voice. “It seems you are right, as always.”

 

“You were worried because of what that man, Henry, told you. About them.” He processes. Clearly the matter gets under Roy’s skin, deep enough to torment him.

 

But Roy is already shaking his head. “It’s nothing, really. Probably just old memories messing up with my head.” His foot reaches out again to cuddle Edward’s.

 

“What if you ask your aunt?” Edward prompts. “She might know who he is and-”

 

“Better not.” Roy says almost immediately and hurries to explain “I.. when I was a boy I have been a pain in the ass about it, always demanding information about them. I was so eager for information and..I came to the point to make her cry. It was terrible. She never did before, since I can remember. I promised myself to stop. In the end, they were dead and she was there for me.” He lets out a laugh and Edward raises both eyebrows at the change of mood.

 

“You know, the next day, it’s when I found out about alchemy. In barely twenty-four hours, my life completely changed.”

 

Edward’s foot cuddles him gently, always preferring actions over words.

 

“But that’s amazing” Roy continues talking and Edward doesn’t miss the attempt to change subject “that we can go that far with our bond. Makes you wonder what we could be able to do in time if we train it.” He looks up at the other man, who is looking at him with a serious glance.

 

“Teacher suggested something like that when I talked to her.” He slowly admits.

 

“You told her”.

 

Edward huddles up a bit at the confession. “She brought me on the island, beaten me to the ground and demanded to know what was wrong with me. After fainting in her kitchen, there was no way to get away with it. I am sorry.”

 

“What for? You don’t have to ask permission. And she loves you. You did right.” Edward concedes a nod. “So we can actually train it?” Roy asks curious.

 

“Yeah..I mean, we can try at least. Don’t know for sure.”

 

But Roy shuts him up by declaring “I’m in. We are gonna do it every morning before work.”

 

“Don’t get too excited. It might be for nothing. Besides, you are the one who gets up late every morning.”

 

“Love, I’d like to remind you I got up first this morning. And I’m ill.” Roy mocks him.

 

Edward scowls at him. “Not my fault. Russel forced us to stay there until he got his chance to meet the writer and asking him all sort of things. That was embarrassing.”

 

Roy laughs.

 

“So you guys had fun. And what did your colleague had to say?”

 

“Philip?” Edward asks dumbly, because he is trying to find a way to gild the pill. “He is the one who knows the scientist. Talked to him for a bit, then left the scene to Russel. He appreciated the conference.” Adds at last.

 

“But?”

 

“He might have a different opinion about the evening in general.”

 

Roy straights up and gets closer, smelling something off by the way Edward is not explaining himself. Whatever it is, he wants to tell him, but it troubles him all the same. Like if he is thinking he did something wrong.

 

“What about it?”.

 

“Last night, Russel got a cab as soon as we finished. He had to come back to Fletcher and- by the way. Philip and I – we were talking and..” he shakes his head, pissed and glances at him for a moment. “I am not like you. I am not that good at reading people, and the last week was a living hell and my mind was somewhere else and it’s all my fault”

 

“Ed.” Roy moves next to him, shaking his head, “I’m sorry I made you suffer. I should have not accepted Haruko’s request.”

 

“That’s not-“

 

“Yes it is. But I don’t understand what you are saying. Is everything ok? Did you argue?”

 

Edward stares at him, his mouth open, looking for the right words.

 

“He tried to kiss me”.

 

 

 

 

_“What”_

 

 

 

A wall of distress, jealousy and fury hit his senses. Roughly. Undeniably Roy’s.  
“Whoa..calm down”.

 

He understands it is not him who this anger is aimed to, but he feels responsible nevertheless. And of course, the mushy bastard already caught him. The wave of all of that trails off a little bit.

 

“Ed, this is not your fault.”

 

“I talked him out of it”.

 

“He is interested in you. It’s not going to just disappear like-”

 

“Yes, I know. He needs time but I don’t think it will be a problem..for ..you know..”

 

Roy sights, “Edward, I don’t give a fuck about being public, even if I would like to do it on our terms.”

 

Edward is looking at him with big, wide eyes. How is it that he still needs to persuade this brilliant man that he deserves all of it and even more?

 

“Come here” Roy opens his arm to grab Edward’s shoulder and pulling him closer. He draws circle on the other’s arm with his thumb for a while, both relaxing.

 

“Ed?”

 

“Mh?”

 

“If he tries anything, and I mean anything, I am going to burn him down to the crisp. Please feel free to tell him too.”

 

Edward smiles. He got that much even without the warning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite Roy’s reassurances, Edward kept thinking about what happened the whole weekend. Today in particular, it was office work’s turn, so he has had plenty of time to do everything was needed and to worry over the thing.

 

He meant it, when he said that some people are used to lie in order to get closer to a person they are interested in. And the reasons behind such a behavior are various. Idolatry, stalking, hate, hidden goals.

 

Edward is reading the same paragraph for the third time when one of the typists, Ilms, passes by his desk.

 

“Elric, are you joining us for lunch?”

 

“Thanks guys, but I need to finish this. I’ll catch up later”

 

Ilms smiles in solidarity and waves a hand on his way out. Edward comes back to read. Or to not read.

 

Then..why use this argument in particular? Surely there would have been more incisive arguments. Things about the job, or about his current life, Roy’s friends and ..him. If anyone were to find out about Roy’s love interest, it could be used as a weakness..

 

He gives up, leaving the paper on the desk and stretching on the chair, closing his eyes to make his mind clearer in the mess of his reasoning.

 

Something else is off. Why would someone risk to draw unrequired attention upon themselves by contacting Roy in North City rather than in Central. Fine, he would have been with his men (and overall, Hawkeye), but that said, life in the capital is far more chaotic and therefore a more suitable environment for setting up a casual meeting. You just need a uniform and a file folder to pass unwatched. They had enough proof of that when Lokan –or one of his men- introduced in the Headquarters last year.

 

This leads to a third consideration. The reason Edward immediately made Roy promise to always be in someone else’s company. If they knew he was in North City, they might be aware of his movements.

 

Roy tried to reassure him but in fact he must think the same things. He is smarter than that.

 

The office is empty, everyone on their way to the cafeteria. Edward meditates for a moment on what to do. The rhythmic drum of the metal fingers echoes in the room. He gets up and grabs his jacket.

 

“All right. Let’s do it”.

 

He exits the Investigation Bureau and walks down the aisle, toward the Civil Archives. It’s not like someone is going to challenge him if he wants to go through a few files. He works in Investigations, after all. And yes, he knows it’s wrong. You don’t get to stick your nose in someone’s private affairs. But it’s about Roy. If it turns out there is nothing worrisome, no one would even know about it.

 

As he walks over the entrance of the archive and shows his ID card to the soldier in charge, he tries not to think about the other option. He tries to stay as calm as possible. Having Roy looking for him in this moment wouldn’t be for the best.

 

The Civil Archives collect every document about the whole citizenship of Central City and the social structures. They also happen to store all sorts of documents about national founded projects, for examples streets, railways and so on. But that’s not what Edward is looking for.

 

He goes straight to the Birth Certificates Section.

 

1885\. Eleventh aisle, beginning from the eighth shelf. Ordered by month.

 

He pushes the metal stair in correspondence and starts opening the boxes dated in August.

 

Roy was born on 15th August.

 

 

_August 2nd .._   
_..August 8th, Augus 11th .._

_August 15th_

 

“Where are you?”

 

_Donovan,.. Lewis,..Mori.._

_Mustang_

 

Edward pulls out the folder from the box and tries to sit more comfortably on the stair to open it.

 

Roy Mustang   
Born: November 15th, 1885, Central City, homebirth   
Mother: Hannah Sinclair. Deceased   
Father: James Wan. Deceased   
Guarantor: Chris Mustang

  
A sigil at the bottom of the page.

 

The folder also contains a few medical report. Especially, those dated after Roy joined the Military.

 

“Mhm.” Edward passes all of them again. He has always been in good health even when he was a child. However, he still remembers how much he hated the medical check ups his mother took him and his brother to have in Resembol. The doctor stalking him about drinking the fucking milk.

 

Why there are not medical reports before the fifth year?

 

Edward puts the folder aside and starts running his fingers through the others, his eyes dimmed as he murmurs

 

“Sorry Mr. ..”

 

He picks up a random folder and open his eyes

 

“..Mr.Jenkins”

 

He opens the folder and rapidly checks up the medical reports. Mr. Jenkins is also a military employee, born in Central and now working in the West, as far as he sees. However, he seems to be provided with medical reports dated before the fifth year.

 

Edward takes the birth certificate in his hands. Takes a look. Than he takes it again.

 

“Ok. No..”

 

He opens Roy’s folder again and pulls out his birth certificate, too.

 

The sigils are different.

 

And now that he is taking a more careful look at the two files, he notices something else. Something obvious to him more than to someone else.

 

The sheet in Roy’s folder has been forged with alchemy. He can just say by touch. He was so focused on the data he didn’t even notice. Even if the sigil wasn’t different, he would at this point doubt about it being authentic.

 

He puts back Mr.Jenkins stuff in a state of utter confusion.

 

Suddenly, Edward hears a rumor of steps approaching, so he has just a few seconds to pull out a blank sheet he took from the office in case of need, activate a simple transmutation and copy Roy’s birth certificate. He puts the folder with the copy back in place and hides the real one in the inner pocket of his jacket when he hears a soldier calling for him.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

_Fuck. Let’s play_

 

He jumps down the stairs and faces the keeper with his chin up, challenging him.

 

“That’s Sir to you.” And he pulls out his watch to be seen. The soldier salutes immediately.

 

“I’m sorry Sir. I heard something and wanted to check up. Is there something I can help you with?”

 

“I’m fine, thank you Private. I’m leaving.”

 

 

 

Edward exit the Section in silence. Always in silence, he moves toward the upfront section with a heavy heart. Death Certificates.

 

This time it will take a little longer. Roy told him his parents died when he was four years old. So it’s safe to start checking all the files between August 1889 and August 1890.

 

It takes Edward about an hour to go through all the W- named men died in Central during those months. Apparently, the people who decide to die in Central are far more than those who end up being born.

 

He finds nothing.

 

“Ok, Mrs.Sinclair, it’s just you and me now” Edward whispers.

 

The women are more than the men are.

 

Almost two hours pass.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Hello, General Mustang Office.”

 

“Hi, it’s me.” Edward has just came back in his own office.

 

“Hey Boss. Are you all right?”

 

Edward curses himself for being so obviously upset.

 

“Yeah Jean. Just a bit tired. Can I speak to him?”

 

“Sure. Wait a moment.”

 

It takes a few seconds for Roy to pick up the phone.

 

“General Mustang speaking”. He can hear the sound of the pen scratching the papers on the background.

 

“Roy..”

 

His mouth has dried out.

 

“Edward.” Roy says surprised. “I was going to call you. I have been with Haruko the whole morning and I came back around five minutes ago. Riza is not even here today and I have to finish all these-“

 

“Roy” Edward tries to articulate what he wants to say in a way that doesn’t give away too much, “I need to speak to you about something. But I’d rather prefer not doing it over the phone.”

 

“My office?”

 

“Somewhere more private?”

 

He can hear Roy’s chair crack as it moves.

 

“The roof. Give me ten minutes?” He asks, more serious.

 

“Sure” Edward nods closing his eyes.

 

“Are you all right?” A pause. “Edward?”

 

 

“See you in ten minutes” and hangs up.

 

 

 

 

 

“Edward, what happened?” Roy’s cheeks are lightly heated up. He closes the metallic door and takes a few steps ahead to reach him.

 

“I needed to talk to you.”

 

“And you couldn’t do it in the office” Roy adds with a wondering tone. He can feel just how much Edward is nervous about it and he clearly doesn’t like it.

 

“Better not. Listen, before..I know that what I did is wrong and I apologize. I should have asked but I was-“

 

“Calm down”

 

“worried and I..“

 

“Calm down Edward”

 

“..am sorry.”

 

He pulls out the birth certificate and gives it to him. Roy opens it but the other man anticipates him.

 

“It’s yours”

 

Roy’s features tighten as he realize what has happened, Edward’s words making now sense.

 

“What about it?” he asks in a severe tone.

 

“Look at it”

 

“I already know what it says. It’s my birth certificate-“

 

“No! Look at it. _Really_ look at it”. But Roy is not listening, his lips now turning into a severe line. He is pissed by Ed’s behavior. “Why did you copy it?”

 

“It’s not a copy. It’s the original.”

 

Upset leaves place to confusion in Roy’s features. “What?”. The wind is lightly moving his hair in the afternoon light. Edward himself needs to move his hand to keep his own under control.

 

“It’s the original file. I replaced it with a copy. I mean, it already was a fake so..”

 

Roy is –now carefully- examining the sheet in his hands. “Are you sure?”

 

“It’s not just that. The sigil used for it doesn’t match with the year. The Military stopped using that one years before you were born. For anyone not looking for something off, it would look fine.”

 

“But you were looking for something..” Roy takes his eyes back on Edward. No more wary.

 

Edward nods. “I kept asking myself, why someone would choose your family as subject when they could provoke you with more obvious, recent things like your private life, or your work. You tried to dismiss all of it, but I am worried. And I know you are as well. “

 

Roy sights “You are right. But this time you are being more objective than me. I didn’t even think about what you’ve just said. You overestimate me”

 

“So, if they’re not looking for setting up a blackmail, or a trap, what do they want?” he thinks out loud.

 

“I don’t know. But..” Edward feels a hole opening in his stomach thanks for the tension building up. Other than privacy, there is another reason for which he preferred to discuss this on the roof.

 

Roy takes a further step and grabs him by his shoulder.

 

“Ed? Why are you..?”

 

 

“They might be right.” He finds the strength to say.

 

“Who?”

 

“Whoever you talked with. I went looking for your parents’ accident. I found nothing.”

 

Roy’s hands lowers down.

 

 

“How did you know the date?” Roy’s voice cracks a little.

 

“I didn’t” Edward takes a particularly long look at his feet. “I checked up a whole year span. Both female and male deceases, looking for them.”

 

“That’s-that’s not possible. Did you checked 1889?”

 

“Yes”

 

“November?” Roy forces himself to ask. Edward nods.

 

Roy stares at nothing, shaking his head and walking around.

 

When it’s clear he is not going to calm down any time soon, Edward tries to make him.

 

“Roy, ..”

 

“No, no. There must be something wrong. We just need to find the police reports about that day or..” but the words die on his lips as he brings his eyes back on Edward. He is looking at him with wet eyes.

 

“You already did” Roy realizes, his heart thundering in his hears.

 

“I came back looking for their birth certificates, too. There is nothing, Roy. Hannah Sinclair and James Wan don’t exist in any official file.”

 

 

 

 

It’s half past four when the door of the pub opens abruptly, causing the coloured glasses to tremble dangerously.

 

Some girls are already around, preparing the table and tenses, expecting an unsatisfied client. They relax when they recognize Roy. The fact that he is followed by Edward doesn’t shock them either. They don’t ask questions, especially when their eyes can already detect everything they need to know. Besides, it’s not the first time they pass by to pay a visit to the Madam.

 

Therefore, the sudden shout makes them jump in utter surprise.

 

“Chris!!” Roy calls out loud.

 

If Edward’s face is a mixture of anger, sadness and tension, Roy’s is livid with fury. The younger man tried to stop him from rushing through the streets, tried to talk to him. But he was overwhelmed by Roy’s feelings and in the end, he decided to stay by his side until it was all over.

 

The Madam pops up from the back of the shop, her eyes wary.

 

“Roy! What a _manner_ -”

 

“We need to talk. Now.”

 

Chris looks at Edward, trying to figure out what’s going on, if it is serious or not.

 

Edward stands her glare and shakes his head, trying to convince her to go along with the nephew.

 

“Let’s go upstairs. The girls need the space” she says, showing them the way.

 

It’s the first time Edward is allowed to see the first floor of the pub. Under other circumstances he would be either really curious or really embarrassed. Right now, he doesn’t give a fuck. Roy’s emotions and his own are leaving him electrified and kind of numb at the same time. The man by his side is in shock and with the preconditions he himself provided, the outcome of the visit will hardly be enjoyable.

 

They enter the second room on the right. Edward is the last one and closes the door. The table full of papers and maps recalls an office. Probably Madam’s. On the right a coat hanger provides all sorts of chiffon cloaks and..what look like feather scarfs.

 

“Is there someone else on this floor right now?” he immediately asks to her.

 

“I don’t think so” Chris raises one eyebrow at the question. He doesn’t bother to explain himself and activates a transmutation in order to soundproof the room. This conversation is gonna need some privacy.

 

Roy nods at him grateful. Then turns to face her aunt.

 

“Now, can either of you explain me what is going on here?” Madam Christmas asks managing to sound bored, intrigued and wary at the same time.

 

“Nice question. I have a better one. Explain _this_ to me.” And pulls out the certificate from the pocket of his coat. He places it on the table between them.

 

“What is this?” the Madam asks before looking at it and turning pale.

 

“He told me there is something off with my birth certificate.” He reveals, referring to Edward. “But you already know, don’t you?”

 

“Why did you go looking for..”

 

Roy violently slams his hand on the table between them. Edward’s never seen him like this. By the worried frown on the woman’s face, she hasn’t either.

 

“It doesn’t matter!! What matters is how are you gonna explain me this!” and points at the paper in her hands, furious. He continues, “This is a false. A well done."

 

Edward intervenes as well, more quietly, “Also, the sigil used is of a different kind. It has been used just until 1880.”

 

“And he is quite sure this document was forged with alchemy”. Roy insists, trying to lure her out, whatever this is about.

 

She looks away.

 

“Roy, listen. There are things…things you don’t know-”

 

“Yeah? Like my parents?”, he raises his tone.

 

And Madam’s mask cracks a little further, eyes back on him, dripping with worry.

 

“Roy, whoever you talked with-”

 

“What happened to them?”

 

 

 

 

Edward saw the question coming, but can’t help a flinch all the same. Mostly because of what it’s coming to him from Roy. He just broke his promise to never ask her about them again. He is hurt and is hurting her back and he knows it but is doing it anyway.

 

 

 

 

Roy’s direct question snaps in the silence of the room.

 

The sun is already setting, outside the window.

 

The Madam’s lips are still sealed. It’s almost terrifying to see her without filters, without a mask. A tremendously clever woman, always with an ace in the hole, foreseeing everything around her. Except right now, she is left without advantage nor ace. Her eyes show to Edward that she knows it. And to Roy. Which animates him even more. The room shakes at the sound of his shout.

 

“Why there are no files about my parents, or their families?! About their accident.”

 

 

Edward can’t do much more than watching at the scene. Roy lied. He's never stopped longing for them. He just pushed it all down because he was a good person and now it was all coming back doubled and it was dreadful. A hole at the center of his and Edward’s chests.

 

 

 

She is slowly shaking her head, looking at her hands. Has she made up to her mind?

 

_“WHY??”_

 

 

 

 

“You weren’t born here”

 

 

 

“What?” Roy lets out with a strangled voice.

 

She moves on the chair and covers her face with both hands. For the first time Edward sees defeat in her eyes. And fear. And something else, too.

 

 

 

“You were born in Creta.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting now because I will be pretty busy the next days because of the tailoring exam. Let me know if you see typos or anything else. I’ll check as soon as I can. And of course, your thoughts <3

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You were born in Creta”.

 

The bomb detonates in a blink of an eye, leaving all of them dazed.

 

“What- what are you talking about..” Roy struggle to articulate his next words.

 

Chris is probably aware to be walking on a dangerous path because she tries to convey what she has to say in an almost telegraphic way.

 

“You were born in Creta. When we moved here, I got all the false certificates you needed. Your mother was born there too. I knew her since before that. We were childhood friends.”

 

Roy takes the blow. Well, words hit him like waves, leaving him defenseless. There is no fight to plan here. Just the truth slapping him in the face. By the hands of a woman he considered family his whole life. For the first time in his life he stops to consider what he really knows about the woman who raised him. Her last words have just proven what he is thinking. Nothing.

 

He glances over at Edward who is scrutinizing him with a worried look. The Madam is observing them interacting with a clever look, clearly seeing something more than common empathy between them. Something he is not willing nor in the capacity to hide right now. He takes a couple steps forward. He covers his mouth, trying to calm down.

 

“I am.. _Cretan_?” he articulates out loud, like if it could make the assessment more plausible.

 

She shakes her head resolutely.

 

“No, you are Amestrian”

 

What does she mean? That his father was, after all, Amestrian? Were his memories distorted by her stories about them? Was there something true about himself? It’s Edward to voice his nerves.

 

“But you just told him..!” the younger alchemist addresses her, angry.

 

“It’s more complicated than that.” She looks at him with rage. After all, all she knows is that he found out about this secret, whatever it is, because of Edward. When the truth is he went looking for answers after Henry showed up.

 

“Anyway, this is a private matter and you shouldn’t-” Chris is attacking Ed without reserves, standing up behind the table. He stops her right away standing in the way.

 

“He’s not going anywhere!! And now talk, for God’s sake, before I storm out for good.”

 

She sits down again.

 

“Your mother’s family. It was..an important family. Many, many years ago they were forced to leave the country. They sought refuge in Creta along with other friends and their families. Time passed and they never had the chance to come back. When you were four..your father was killed. We run, trying to get your mother and you to safety. They were dark, dark times. She made us promise to take good care of you. All we did was for your best. I was going to tell you. Try to understand-” she is about to put off some justification but he interrupts her again.

 

“Us?” Roy frowns confused.

 

“Berthold and I. He helped me entering the country and settling things. Then...” she leaves the period hanging in the air.

 

Edward has no idea who the man is, but by the way Roy’s lips turn into a rigid line, this is not good news. Roy covers his face with both hands. He turns towards Edward. He is reading him, because his eyes tell him he knows what question is coming next. He turns back once more and locks his eyes with Chris’.

 

“What happened? What..happened to her?”

 

Was she killed too? Why did his father die? Maybe..

 

“She died in order to let us run away. She saved you.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

The floor is dead silent and the room is isolated. However, Roy’s stream of feeling is deafening for Edward.

 

Loss. Grief. Anger. Confusion. Pain. Betrayed. Anger. Grief again.

 

And something above everything else. Self-recrimination. For what happened to them, for ignoring Chis’ half truths, for..

 

It’s all so fast to leave Edward sick. Just like Roy.

 

Chris is still sit, but on the alert, waiting for any kind of emotional response. More questions.

 

“Roy..”

 

Roy swallows down her prayer and offers nothing in return.

 

He is overloaded, Edward realizes. He walks closer, grabbing his forearm, trying to break through. But Roy’s soul waves apologetically at him, trying to shush him, too busy building some kind of wall between his pain and all the rest.

 

When he is satisfied with the results, he murmurs with a severe voice.

 

“You lied to me. Everything you’ve ever told me is a lie. Don’t ever come looking for me again. _We’re_  
 _done_.” And he turns his back, heading for the door, not waiting for an answer.

 

“No!! Wait!” she screams horrified.

 

Edward follows him in the aisle but the Madam stops him. Roy is already downstairs.

 

“He has to listen to me, Edward. What he knows..”

 

While she talks, Edward must be showing all his shared distress. He doesn’t let her finish the sentence.

 

“He found out enough for today, don’t you think?”

 

“What happened to you two?” She is clever enough to notice there is something strange, Edward realizes. How much did she get? Was it just now or she had suspicions all along? Roy clearly told her nothing.

 

“I don’t think you have the right to ask for anything right now.” She shakes her head, pushing the more urgent matter.

 

“He has no idea what is waiting for him. He is in danger-“

 

“He is not. I will deal with it.”

 

“You can’t protect him! Not this time. Not from this. He needs to be prepared.”

 

“He is strong. And so that you know, yes. I _fucking_ can.”

 

He pauses for a second before stepping outside.

 

Sometimes knowledge is a blessing. Sometimes is a curse. He wonders which one this situation falls into.

 

 

 

 

 

They get back in the car but after a few minutes of silence, Roy arrests the car in a cross street a few blocks ahead.

 

Asking if he is ok makes no sense. Through their bond Edward can sense just how devastated Roy is. It is a miracle he is keeping it together. And he did this to him. Well, he didn’t. But if he didn’t go digging up he wouldn’t have discussed with the only family he had left. He wouldn’t be lost in the way he can feel he is.

 

 

Roy is sitting with his eyes closed, trying to calm down. Under any other circumstance he would be able to put on one of his masks, a calm and reassuring behavior. Maybe faking some apathy, if needed. But something’s jammed.

 

His hands whiten, tightening on the wheel. Edward is a silent presence at his side, the only comfort he can think of.

 

He breaths in and out, rapidly, trying again. But the words keep following one another in his head. In the morning he woke up, as he did for almost thirty years, having a life, a past, a family. But most of it is a fake, he’s now realizing, leaning onto the wheel with his forehead. He has never willingly lied about his past but he feels a wretched accomplice of his aunt -can he even keep considering her as aunt? -

 

A broken voice breaks through.

 

“I’m s-orry”. He jerks his head up to look at Edward, who is trying to repress some tears. Some slip through anyway, staining his cheek and disappearing in the thick blue fabric of the uniform.

 

“I’m-I’m sorry. If I didn’t.. -“.

 

It seems ages since he saw Edward crying. It was the night Alphonse visited. The night he told him about his feelings. Edward is not inclined to tears. And if he is giving in now it’s because of what has just happened. And because, Roy realizes, he’s pushing everything down unwilling to deal with his own emotions, damaging Ed instead.

 

And he moves, regretting to be the piece of shit he knows he is.

 

He frames Edward’s face with both hands and makes their forehead touch. He tries to calm down enough to speak. The younger man precedes him, as usual.

 

“I shouldn’t h-“

 

“You have done anything wrong Ed. I’m sorry I reacted the way I did on the roof. I was upset but you were just trying to protect me.” He swept away the tears.

Edward cups his right hand and it’s so damning comforting.

 

Roy would just stay there and forget about everything else. But he can’t afford the luxury. Neither does deserve it after such a poor behavior.

 

“I have to be back in the office.” He admits. He feels exhausted. “I have another meeting within an hour”

 

Edward grimaces, probably thinking against it. He straights up.

 

“We can call Havoc and tell him to-“

 

“No, no. It’s ok. I am going.” “I am sorry..”

 

_That I acted like I did, that I made you cry, that .._

 

“..we’ll have to talk later.”

 

Edward just tightens is grip, slowly nodding. He turns on the engine.

 

“I’ll wait for you at home then.”

 

 

 

 

 

It’s half past six when Edward comes back home. He knows Roy won’t be there before another hour at least. He takes his chance to use the bathroom and run the laundry machine before making something to eat for later.

 

He takes some ham, meat and boiled pumpkin out the fridge. The idea was making something more elaborated, but he doesn’t really feel in the mood with everything that happened so he opts for some meatballs. There is some salad, too.

 

While they cook in the oven, he lays down on the couch. He feels upset. So upset it seems there is some ice in his chest.

 

It’s eight and twenty when he takes the meatballs out of the oven. He cooks the other things but by the time he is done, Roy hasn’t showed up yet.

 

“Fucking meetings and fucking politics”. They decided to be all productive and shit the worst day ever.

 

An hour passes. Still no sight of Roy. Edward decided to wait him for having dinner but at a certain point he thought to put the meatball back in the now cooled oven. He can always warm them up once he arrives home.

 

He lays back on the couch, swearing and unable to distract himself with a book or anything else.

 

It’s ten o’clock when he gets up, just to turn on the light of the entrance.

 

Then he comes back there and keeps waiting. Questions keep packing into his mind.

 

How are they gonna talk about what happened?

 

Is there anything he can do to help his aunt making up with him?

 

Who is Berthold?

 

It’s eleven o’clock and he starts getting worried. Maybe he should call the office and ..what? Make the worried wife? Better not. He kicks himself for his stupid flights of fancy.

 

That’s when he hears a distinct knock at the door. He jumps up in a sitting position.

 

A knock on the door. Roy would have not knocked. Who can it be?

 

He hopes it’s not the Madam.

 

Another knock as he gets to the door. What the hell?

 

“Edward?”. It’s Riza voice.

 

A shiver of fear runs down Edward spine. He slams the door open.

 

He calms down almost immediately, seeing Riza and Roy in front of him. What he realizes in a couple of seconds is that he shouldn’t have. Riza has Roy’s arm around her neck, in order to help him walking. His eyes are open but not really focused on something in particular. And what with the smell of..

 

“He’s drunk.”

 

“ _Come again_?”

 

But Riza is trying to walk Roy into the house, not without some effort. “Help me”

 

Edward comes to grab Roy’s other arm and they manage to drive him inside the house and making him lie down on the couch in the living room. He’s so wasted he slips into unconsciousness almost immediately.

 

“What happened?” Riza asks him, worried.

 

“You tell me. How did he got drunk?”. Edward has pulled off his boots and is now covering him with a plaid.

 

Riza moves her eyes from the man on the couch to the one besides her. Her eyes widening.

 

“You don’t know.”

 

 

 

 

 

She makes them move back in the entrance to talk. And she does. Words rain upon him, cold and rough.

 

_A drinking problem. PTSD. Ishval._

 

“After the war it was pretty bad, but Maes and his aunt helped. A lot. Except for a few bad nights, he stopped drinking at all by the time we met you.”

 

“Then, when Maes died, he fell back into it. A few episodes. And..” she gulps, in discomfort recalling it, “he had a bad night after you went missing. A month had already passed and we had no clue. That time Chris found him in the bathroom so gone he didn’t recognize her, at first.”

 

“After he met the brass, he came back in the office and asked to be left alone. Jean didn’t question it and I wasn’t there. Then.. Jean called me and I helped him to get him in the car..”

 

She doesn’t complete the phrase.

 

Edward sights, covering his face, in distress. It makes sense. The guys of the office never asking if he wants to join for a drink after work but always asking him out in any other occasion. Roy doesn’t keep any alcohol in the house. He never questioned it before, not being a great drinker himself. Now it explains itself. He avoids it, but there are a few bottles in the office. Standard furniture pluses for high ranking military..

 

“He discussed with his aunt. The _..I never wanna see you again-_ kind of discussion.” He admits.

 

“But..that’s not possible. Why would-“

 

“She lied to him.”

 

Edward can rely on many levels with Roy’s situation. He has a major degree in disappointing parenthood. However, the story still seems to be unclear under many aspects and for Roy’s sake he hopes they can provide Chris with a worthy reason for her actions. Other than this, Roy seemed hurt by finding out that this Berthold lied in his face, too.

 

“She has been telling him lies about his family all along.”

 

They stay in silence for a few minutes. Until the sound of a muffled voice breaks it.

 

“I’ll leave him to you then. Please, call if you need anything.”

 

“Thank you. And thank Havoc, too.”

 

She smiles softly and heads for the door. Edward rapidly enters the living room.

 

Roy is still on the couch, eyes almost open but drowsy. He is murmuring a flow of words without much sense. Then Edwards comes into his line of vision.

 

“Ed” he chokes out.

 

“You moron” the younger man says without anger, combing his hair out of the forehead, to check the temperature, as he sits by his side.

 

“I’m tired” Roy says with his eyes closed. The fact is, Edward perfectly knows what he means. He can feel the weight on his chest, not so different from the one he bared in his worst moments, during the first months of Al being trapped in the armour. After Lokan tortured him. That kind of moral exhaustion that leaves you forceless, trapped and lost.

 

“I’m sorry” the rough voice comes.

 

Edward gulps hearing it, forcing himself to answer back in a light mood.

 

“You need to sleep.”

 

“Ed-ward” Roy softly calls him “I’m sorry”

 

Edward adjust the plaid. “Just..rest for a while, ok? No need to talk”. He stands up, aiming to take another cushion and some water for Roy when a hand weakly grabs his wrist. He freezes.

 

Roy’s eyes are looking for him, just for him, from under gravity-defeated eyelashes.

 

“Don’t -go away.. please”.

 

And this hurts like a bitch. Because he knows what Roy means. Terror lingers underneath those words.

 

He doesn’t mean now. He doesn’t mean to not leave the room.

 

“Don’t leave me”

 

Roy doesn’t let go despite the effort it requires in his state.

 

“Please.. _please_ Ed. Don’t-”

 

“Not going anywhere”.

 

Edward’s voice leaves for good as he lies down himself, making Roy move just enough to keep him between himself and the seat, spooning him.

 

“I am here.”

 

Roy surrenders to sleep shortly after and Edward follows him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The sound of porcelain being moved in the kitchen brings Roy to regain consciousness. A plaid is sprayed all over him and for a couple of seconds he can’t honestly remember how he ended up sleeping on the couch instead of his bed.

 

It’s just a moment, the nicest one, being unable to recall everything that happened in the last twenty-four hours.

 

Then it all comes back to mind. His mood sinks.

 

“You are off. Until tomorrow if necessary.”

 

Edward has been watching him from the doorframe, silently reading his emotions.

 

Roy sits up, absently registering the colossal headache he’s rapidly developing thanks to his own stupidity.

 

“Edward”

 

The young man moves and slowly approaches and Roy braces himself to explain his despicable behavior and hopefully to gain forgiveness -which he doesn’t deserve, really-. He gets up from the couch.

 

“Edward I-”. A hand slams over his mouth, shutting him up before he can continue.

 

“Don’t” Edward stops him. He doesn’t seem angry.

 

“I don’t pretend to know everything about how you are feeling right now and I am so, so sorry for..everything that happened. So..you get away with it. But..” and he shuts his eyes as he literally begs.

 

“Never do it again. It-it broke my heart. I can’t see you like that.”

 

And suddenly something is pushing him and strong arms are wrapping him tightly.

 

 

 

“I won’t”

 

 

And Edward lets himself bask in the safe, warm hug. They stay like that for a while, no need to talk.

 

“Do you even know how much I love you?” the older man lets out sighting.

 

He would like to observe that technically it is somehow rhetorical, in their case.

 

Instead he chooses to stamp a light kiss against his neck.

 

He detects something coming from Roy. The need to fix something. Also, the urge to take action. He distances himself a bit.

 

“Don’t take it bad but..you need a shower. Badly. Then we can talk.”

 

Because, as much as it might be unpleasant, they need to talk. Most of all, they need to put order in whatever mess they’ve been thrown into.

 

He’s making some coffee when he hears Roy coming downstairs, make a rapid call -probably to the office- and then joining him in the kitchen.

 

“Thanks”, Roy sits, stretching to take the cup Edward is offering him.

 

“So..am I supposed to go digging, right?” Roy starts.

 

“I’d saying no, but since there is someone interested in your past, you should know it as well. It’s safer”.

 

Roy slowly nods, watching the steam raising from the mug on the table. Edward decides to take the lead in the conversation.

 

“Who is Berthold? Your aunt told he knew about your parents, too. Can’t we ask him?”

 

Roy covers his face with both hands, clearly tired despite the early hour.

 

“We can’t. He is dead”

 

“Shit”

 

“It doesn’t even begin to cover”.

 

At Edward’s raised eyebrow, he continues. “He..he used to be my alchemy teacher.”

 

“Your _one of a kind- fire alchemy_ alchemy teacher?” the other man jerks on the chair at the revelation.

 

Roy nods, and keeps talking looking in the void.

 

“He came by the pub one day. My aunt was so happy to see him. He fired up some candles and..I was struck. I begged him to teach me. And he did.”

 

There is sadness and loss in his voice.

 

“What happened?” It’s obvious there is more in the story.

 

Roy looks at him for a moment, before losing himself back in memories.

 

“The war. I was..I decided to enroll and I knew he was against it but I did it anyway. When I came back to tell him before leaving for the academy, he got angry. We were discussing when he had a heart attack.”

 

Guilt and self-recrimination crawl through Roy once again, strong enough for Ed to sense them.

 

“It wasn’t-”

 

“Sure, it is. Maes talked me out of it too. So many times. It doesn’t change anything.”

 

Edward doesn’t reply for a moment, before standing up and reaching him. He sits on his lap, getting a confused look from Roy. He frames his face with both hands. A little roughly.

 

 

“It.is.not.your.fault you stupid. You didn’t kill him. You decided to do something. You were trying to do what you felt was right. Shit happens anyway.”

 

Roy is staring at him with eyes far too wide.

 

“You always blame yourself over things. Like yesterday. Your aunt fucked up. You did nothing wrong demanding for answers. And I am never gonna dump you. Even if you act like a moron sometimes.”

 

 

Guilt runs away, replaced by some mixed feelings Edward can’t pinpoint individually. They feel warm, cozy. Not new, just..strong. Delightfully overwhelming. Roy moves his hands to steady him on his lap. Roy’s pupils look like rich blank ink. If anyone were to write with that ink and dirty their hands with it, it would never wash out. And that’s how he feels right now. He could never wash out that feeling.

 

“Edward-“

 

And the doorbell starts ringing, uninterested in whatever Roy is about to tell him.

 

“We really should get rid of it” Roy lets out resigned. In fact he seems more than annoyed by the interruption. But the feel is soon gone, put apart because of something more urgent.

 

 

“Are we expecting someone?” Edward stands up and asks.

 

Roy imitates him. “I called Riza and asked her to come over. This is about her as much as about me, I am afraid.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“Berthold. He is Riza’s father”

 

 

 

 

 

The morning passes in a blink of an eye. They spend it explaining everything to Riza and asking her about her father. In fact, she couldn’t help them much. She is a couple years younger than Roy and she never knew much about her father’s family or past and after Berthold’s death the only family she got left, as far as she knew, was her maternal one. And one obnoxious uncle above them all, Grumman.

 

Berthold never told her anything about his past. He was a secretive man and after her wife’s death he closed up even more, and even with his own daughter. Yeah, he received a lot of correspondence, Riza told them. But she never questioned it, being her father a well-known researcher. Despite it he did never look for notoriety. What they found out most certainly explain it.

 

Before leaving, she agrees with Edward about the need for further security. She hasn’t stopped glaring at Roy in the last twenty minutes or so and Edward lets him walk her to the door alone, leaving them the space they need to clear things out.

 

Roy is saying something but Riza talks over him. Some words travel to the living room.

 

“-m sorry”

 

“You have-..care about you”

 

“Won’t..again”

 

“I know”

 

 

 

When Roy comes back inside Edward is waiting for him on the armchairs. Roy can swear to hear his brain’s gears at work.

 

“What?”

 

Edward opens his mouth to talk, shuts it up and gets up instead, still thinking about it.

 

“I believe that there is something else we can do. Filling the holes”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You. You are the only other person we know who witnessed at least part of this story. You were too little to remember more than a few things about them. But human mind is strange, and brilliant and it just selects the most valuable information, neglecting the rest. Not forgetting though. Just..it’s like when you need space and get rid of old stuff by putting them in a box on the bottom of your guard robe. You are _not_ throwing them away. You are hiding them and making place for something else. What if we are able to ..unlock them?”

 

“That’s..that’s so you. How..” Roy asks a little confused.

 

“..we do that? I might have an idea” Edward points out rolling up his sleeve and unnecessarily showing his mark to the other man.

 

“Maybe it’s like you said, we just need to strengthen it, like a new muscle, and then we’ll be able to it anytime we want? Lokan said it wasn’t uncommon so..”

 

“You want to help triggering my memories” Roy realizes out loud.

 

“Well, I’d like to try.” Edward shrugs.

 

“Did I already tell you what a genius you are?”

 

“I can’t remember” Edward jokes briefly before adding, “I’ll snoop into the whole thing and see if I can find something else through my channels.”

 

“You will not-”

 

But he thinks better when he see’s Edward’s _no shitting me_ glare.

 

“I don’t want to get you involved. Can’t we just..”. He turns away, not knowing what to say. Edward got a point. Not knowing is a liability. But other than that, right now Edward is the only good he has left and the prospective to put him in danger..

 

 

He doesn’t even register Edward moving to hug him from behind.

 

 

 

“We’ll deal with it together.”

 

 

 

 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please forgive the poor editing / typos

Two months have passed since the day Roy discussed with his aunt. Every time his mind starts wondering about her, he brings himself to think about something else. At first, she tried to get in contact through the girls a few times, never directly, but he declined every time.  
If she tried to contact Edward, he didn’t mention.  
Edward kept his word. Whenever Riza wasn’t with his, he made a point to keep him company. That said, he spent the majority of his time in the facility working closely with Haruko and that meant he has been surrounded by security details 24/7. The man has been growing on him thanks to the new relation the job offered. He is a kind man, with a good temper and a terrible sense of humor.  
And working shoulder to shoulder has also been offering him a good chance to taste the pressure and the importance of the role he was aiming for. During the last days they have been dealing with some major accidents in the area around Central City due to the upcoming winter and the plentiful raining. The situation will hardly improve if it keeps raining like that.

And if days are being spent on reports, emergency plans and public events, free time passes in other ways.

“Oh, come on!” Edward groans, shaking his head in disappointment. Roy opens his eyes as well and fixes them on the man sitting in front of him. They really should move on the couch.  
Meditating on the floor is fine as long as you do it for less than two hours.  
“I told you, you can’t push yourself this way.”  
They committed themselves to Edward’s suggestion to trigger Roy’s memories. The problem wasn’t the absence of connection. Otherwise, they had to develop some kind of focus to get through the chaos of each other’s thoughts in order to not lose the thread. Which brought them to some considerations about how to proceed.

“ _First of all, do you remember anything at all? Your house, your bedroom, people other than your parents?”_  
 _Roy shrugged at the question._  
 _“I told you. It’s just pieces..” he sights, “I remember that one time we had a trip, I have a photo somewhere..” He sights, “My parents playing with me”. Roy’s eyes focus on something invisible and far from their living room._  
 _“That day something happened. They were discussing. I can’t remember.” He shakes his head._  
 _“House?”_  
 _“ Mh.. I remember a magic lamp by the bed. A balcony..I used to play there. A saloon.”_  
 _“No kitchen” Edward pointed out straight away._  
 _“What?”_  
 _“No kitchen. It makes sense. Chris said yours was an important family. That they were Amestrians run away. What you remember is what you were used to live day by day. You remember the bedroom of course, but not the kitchen.”_  
 _“So we basically know nothing?”_  
 _“That’s not true. If they had the means to run away and live there for so long, that means they really were wealthy. It makes my researches simpler, somehow._  
 _“We’ll try to connect with each other again and we’ll play by ear from that point.”_

And that’s what they have been doing during the next weeks. The results were finally coming, slowly but essential. Until now, Roy has been able to retrieve memories about his parents’ apartments, the villa they lived in, the saloon, some elements like colourful carpets and armchairs. It was easier, focusing on inanimate things and environments rather than happenings, as they soon found out.  
Between the two of them, Edward has been experiencing a deeper fatigue to read Roy’s memories. It took a lot from him and they needed to have some breaks through their session. They have no idea of the reason, even if Roy suspects they have been getting there too fast.  
The last week has been particularly stressing. Once they retrieved enough material, they decided to try and remember more specific events, which meant adding people and emotion to the picture. And since Roy dreamt about his parents talking by what they deduced to be the sea, Edward prompted him to start from there. That was a week ago.  
“You need a break” Roy lets out, stretching after minutes of stillness. They have been out meditating for almost twenty minutes now, he deduces looking at the hour.. But the memory remains foggy and confused.  
“I do not. We were so close one second ago. I think we just need a couple of attempts to make it work.”  
“One more time. And either way it goes, we are done for today.” Roy prompts back, gaining rolling eyes from Ed.  
“Fine.” He sights, “I just need to find the right way”  
Roy closes his eyes and Edward follows him. He can’t understand why they are having so many difficulties to break through it when they ended up sharing it unwillingly when they were hundreds of kilometres apart. He knew he could aim for the same kind of unrestricted sensations he experienced that time, like when he rolled in the freezing snow, and the idea not to be able to replicate it was driving him crazy.  
It was the only thing he could do to help Roy through this. He had to try harder.  
“No sense” Roy murmurs, aware.  
“Concentrate.”  
That night, Edward is processing, when he connected with Roy.. it started with the mark warming up. And the sound of water. Lapping. Waves.  
Up and down.

Backwards and forwards.

Sound. Silence. Sound.

 

“James!”. A woman’s voice. Roy’s mother comes into focus. Annah. She is waving her arm “We’re here.” Someone is approaching. They already know it’s Roy’s father. That’s what they have been able to understand so far. He comes, they discuss about something bothering them. Roy was with them so they should be able to retrieve some information.  
But it is difficult to concentrate on the words.  
James reaches them and stamps a light kiss on her lips.  
They already saw it several times by now, the whole memory starting to go to shit a few seconds ahead.  
Maybe that’s it, Edward thinks, watching them. Until now he watched, Roy watched and then they would talk about it. For the first time he stops considering it. And he looks around.  
He starts looking for Roy.  
Well, his Roy at least. The other Roy, child version of him, has been playing a few meters away from his mother, the whole time.  
He needs a few minutes to realize that Roy is in fact standing by the younger version of himself, turning his shoulders to the scene.  
Edward comes closer and grabs Roy’s hand in his own.  
Roy shivers like if he just woke up, his head jerking up to meet Ed’s gaze. At the same time the vision clears out. No more foggy, like they used to see it. But precise as if they were actually there.  
“Edward” Roy sounds astonished, “I can see you here. Before..”  
“Yeah, well.. team up sounds better” Edward jokes “Can you feel it?”  
He means the mark. The moment they touched, it started warming up.  
“I do.” They both turn toward the couple. They don’t let go each other as they walk over.  
James is talking to Annah. And they are finally able to understand what he is saying, all of it. Edward looks up at Roy before bringing his eyes back on his parents.  
“They asked for another meeting of the Council” James admits. He has dirty trousers like if he has been riding for a while, and a tired expression.  
“But that’s-“ Annah’s features freeze in a cold and severe attitude which reminds Edward of Roy those few times when things were getting really bad with Father.  
“I know. Christine told me they were planning something but I didn’t think they would have act that soon” She looked away for a moment, probably trying to calm down. To think about it.  
“What am I supposed to do? We both know there’s nothing for us back there. My father was a fool. I thought they would made up their minds after his death..”  
“They have someone else to look at now. But I will never accept to make him live in a cage like you did.”  
“What do you want to do?”  
“I am going to talk to them.”  
“They won’t listen to you James! You don’t understand, they have already decided.”  
“Running is not wise, Annah. Think about Roy. They would get to you two. I have to try.”  
“And if they don’t want to listen?”  
“Then they don’t deserve neither of you and we run. Our son will be able to choose his own life. Here or everywhere else.”

"Mummy, mummy", the child chants gently, and risks to trip over his own feet for a moment. He grabs her mother’s gown to help himself. "Look!"  
She lowers to accept what Edward recognize as a big pearly shell.  
"That's huge", she cups his cheek and has eyes just for him. Her smile quivers a little too much. James is observing her, a concerned expression on his face.

"Are you sad?" the child asks with a worried voice.

"No sweetie", she ruffles his hair and smiles wider. Roy’s father come in her help. "She wanted to find the biggest one".

"You can keep mine". She kisses him and takes him in her arms, treasuring the shell in her hand.  
"Thank you Roy". But as she does so, she locks her eyes with her husband’s.  
She nods.

 

Then everything turns into smoke and they are in the no-place.  
“That’s new” Roy voices his thoughts, still shaken up despite his effort to sound relaxed. Edward tries to convey some closeness with a stronger grip on the other’s hand. He looks around himself.  
“I told you..I ended up here the first time. It’s like a crossing. We need to go back-”  
He feels the need to sit down.  
Strange, considering that somewhere, he is actually sitting on the floor of their home.  
"Edward? What-"  
“It’s ok”. Maybe the idea of a break is not that bad.

 

Something cracks. They lose some concentration or fuck knows what, Edward has no time to process it.

It's a series of flashes. Candles, the sound of a storm, the smell of cake, and also some people arguing, and music. All together. And then there is grass around them -Resembol -.  
His mother playing with Alphonse among the drying linens outside, the sound of turning pages when his father spent the night studying in the living room. His father leaving. The vegetables rolling on the floor the first time his mother had an attack. The studio. The darkness after what they did. The broken sounds of something breathing a few meters from him, the smell of blood all around them, hot and sticky as it reached him..

 

A snap of fingers.

 

They both wake up abruptly, eyes widen. Edward jolts away, painting like after a long run. He hits the table with his flesh shoulder but he is too gone to care.

He is so focused on it to not realize immediately that Roy has grabbed him by his shoulders.  
“Ed!” Roy’s breath is unstable as well.  
“I-‘m.” He can’t bring himself to look at Roy. How could he let it happen?  
He takes a couple breaths “You w-nt supposed. To see.” He gulps shaking his head violently. “ _So sorry_ , I’m so sorry.”  
“That..it was..” Roy tries to ask. Edward nods without letting him finish. He is still missing the oxygen he needs to put his lungs to work.  
“Love, it’s ok, breath with me. Come on”  
Edward grabs handful of Roy’s shirt and tries to concentrate on his breaths. He needs s good five minutes to calm down. And process everything.  
They did it.  
It worked.  
Except he did fucked up things. Roy shouldn’t have seen that.  
“I told you it would work” he lets out, not knowing what to say.  
Roy ignores him by asking something else entirely.  
“Why shouldn’t I see?”  
Edward remains still, his mind turning blank.  
Because the only thought of that…it still made him sick to the core. Because it was the embodiment of his blind pride. Of his stupidity. It was his nightmare to live with. Never Roy’s.  
“When you know the worst of me.. it’s only fair I share your demons, just like you help me with mine.” Roy advices him before adding “I’m more tired than before. Probably you were the one running out of energies because we were examining only my memories. We should part-time”.  
Edward is looking at him with a mix of shock and trust and worry. He is about to reply but Roy anticipates him. “It doesn’t have to be unpleasant. You could show me about Resembol. And other things.”, Roy adds leaning forward.  
Edward knows he is right, as for usual, so he reluctantly hums in agreement against Roy’s treasonous lips. He breaks apart and Roy is scrutinizing him with a sappy face.  
“You know..I get it now.”  
“What?”. The other man massages is lower lip with his thumb.  
“Whenever Alphonse says you have your mother’s smile”  
How the fuck is this man able to turn him upside down with just a few words, touching his most inner strings? Edward can’t do but blush, shyly.  
“Break?” Roy saves him from himself.  
Edward realizes out loud “You did it. You remember what happened that day”  
“ _We_ -Roy clarifies heading for the kitchen - _did it_. We have some more information now.”  
The younger man follows him, but lingers against the doorframe while Roy retrieves some water.  
“And more questions.”  
“Which will have to wait. You look exhausted and I have to be back to the Headquarters within six o’clock”.  
“The diplomat’s dinner” Edward curses himself for having forgotten. Roy has been in charge of so many public events along with Haruko or by himself he was starting to lose the track of them. “Fuck them”.  
“I’d really much prefer coming back home and fuck _you_.” Roy calmly explains, making him grin.  
“You better” he exhales as Roy comes closer to cup his hips possessively.  
“They were talking about a Council. I’ll scoop into it.”  
“Ok. Just..nothing foolish, remember” Roy acknowledges him. Then he adds, his pupils widening a little, “Thank you. I know why we are doing it, but..I never had a clear memory of them and finally be able to..thank you.”  
Edward pulls him closer by the collar of his shirt and without saying a word starts messing with his hair, pulling them back. He nods, satisfied with the result.  
“Put the purple tie on. I’ll fuck you better when you get home.”  
Roy smirks.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The lights coming through the coloured glasses of the windows paint the pavement with promises of pleasure and entertainment. Chris liked those windows. At first, she noticed the building because of them. They remembered her the windows in James’ house. The old memories bring her back to more recent ones. She has just exited the front door and is already inhaling the first smoke. The cigarette lights up a bit at the motion.  
“You look like shit” a voice interrupts her thoughts.  
With the people continuous coming and going in the street she missed the person standing a few steps from her. The blond hair enlightened by the same lights from inside.  
She just stares at him. It’s not like she can deny it.  
Then a thought strikes her and she is already panicking and opens her mouth to ask what she has wanted to ask in the past weeks.  
Edward anticipates her, “He is fine, don’t worry”  
She let the cigarette slip on the ground.  
Edward steps in front of her and smashes the butt before looking up and speaking.  
“We need to talk.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next morning Roy enters the office just to be glared at by Riza.  
“You missed nothing yesterday. And today we are in.” He says to them all, looking for coffee as he speaks.  
“What?”  
“Fortunately, Haruko exonerated me today.”. Going out with such a weather would be not that appealing. “Just regular work until tomorrow.”  
Havoc asks curious “Why is that Sir?”. Roy shrugs and takes another sip.  
“He told me yesterday at the diplomat’s dinner. Had a personal appointment.”  
“That’s great” the soldier comments smiling. “That means even Fuhrers can have a day off from now and then.”  
Roy opens the door of his office to see his desk buried with papers.  
“Sometimes it doesn’t seem like that at all, Jean.”

 

A knock at the door finds Roy still at his desk, dealing with a nasty report about farming taxes. He had a booked appointment with a private contractor. Just one of the many new tasks expected from him. He already had three this week. It must be him.

"Hello, I have an appointment with General Mustang."

Roy tenses immediately, recognizing Henry’s voice at first. Did he actually enter the most guarded facility of the country and book a meeting with him? He doesn’t miss audacity, that’s for sure.  
He steps out of his office with his usual calm. Hawkeye is welcoming him before letting him in.  
"I'll take it Riza. Please let Edward know I need Jenkins’ report as soon as I am finished here."  
It was their code for emergencies. Edward would have waited for him outside.  
Her hand tightens but it’s the only slip in the otherwise calm appear. “Yes, Sir.”  
He speaks to Henry, heading back into his own office. “Come in, Mr.Pariwell.”

As the door closes, Henry has already started talking. "You seem..different."

"How did you managed to book an appointment with me, here?" The real question is why but they will get there before Henry gets to leave, if Roy decides to let him. Sure thing Riza would be glad to shot him.

"Your aunt isn't the only one with friends working where it matters"  
"I see. And I suppose Pariwell isn’t your real name." Roy decides to ignore the bitterness in Henry’s statement. He waves his hand toward one of the chairs, himself sitting behind the desk, sharpening his skills for the upcoming talk. “It is, actually. I haven’t used it in Amestris for a very long time though.”  
Henry follows his invitation, observing him carefully.  
"Last time you would have arrested me right away. But now you are inviting me to sit in your own office. I get it that you believe me now."  
"Belief is a luxury I do not lean that easily"  
"You are smart. I didn't expect nothing less. So, what if you make questions and I answer them?  
Roy takes a minute to consider his options.

"When we talked, you said you would have come back with proofs".  
"Which I do". He moves to pick something from the bag(?), making Roy straight up, wary. "I mean no harm, son. Let alone I was searched like everybody else entering Commands. It's just papers."

And saying so he pulls out several files to display them.  
The first are photos. Some older than others.

"I did tell you I knew your mother" He handles him the first one, soon followed by others. "Here we were seven. Then when she got her first horse, and at the midsummer party my father hosted every year". There must be twenty at least. Many of the photos show the two of them along with another little girl. Roy recognize her immediately. Chris.  
Henry catches his flick.  
"Yeah. Well, that's a long story as well. But we are talking about you now so.."

Another set of photos is displayed on the table.

His mother with a baby in her arms.

His father playing with him.

His parents.  
Roy detects a rush of nerves, worry and silent support. Edward must be on his way to the office and ready to register every change in his mood. He tries to concentrate enough to let him know he’s ok, for now.

 

"You can keep them all, of course"

Roy cautiously retrieves them all in a tidy pile and set them aside.  
"And. . what now? We shake hands and be good friends?" Roy tries to excite some kind of reaction. Until now, Henry hasn’t made it clear his real purpose in reaching him.  
Henry stays in silence, seizing him with calculating eyes.  
"What exactly do you know about yourself?" Henry asks finally.  
"I know I wasn't born here. That the woman who raised me brought me here because of something, probably related to my parent's death." What he found out on his own, thanks to Edward, Henry didn’t need to know.  
Henry’s eyes set on a cold gaze. "After I spoke with you months ago, I thought Christine would come to her sense and tell you the whole truth. Her version, anyway.” He shakes his head in disappointment.  
“She doesn’t know who I spoke with. Didn’t – he correct himself right away - By the time you exit this place she will probably know you have been here”  
“I guessed that much. Don’t mind, actually. The problem was to get in touch with you the first time without interferences.” Henry admits. “I’m sorry that I creeped you out that night. I thought you knew. I’m going to explain things now, if you let me. I’ll start from the end. It’s ..easier I think”  
“Why don’t you start by telling me why I needed to run away from Creta leaving nothing behind?” Roy replies back. It’s hard not to be in charge of the conversation, especially with has everything to do with you.  
“Well, I beg to differ on that. You didn’t exactly leave nothing”.  
He opens a folder of files and starts to rapidly read them and passing them to Roy to be seen.  
“As for fifteen days ago, when I crossed the Cretan border, you are the rightful owner of all these goods and properties. You are the only heir so no one is going to try and steal them. No one dared even if many of the people who might have been interested had reasons to believe you were dead. Here is the villa your father’s family owned. It’s situated next Maulina’s Gulf and comprehends several acres of land. About lands, you also have some estates in the east of the country and in the north, the later being mostly mineral deposits, though. On your mother’s side instead..”  
It’s just too much. Villas and houses, not just in Creta but in Amestris, too. And lands. Contracts for renting and utilization. And gold. A little fortune compared to those of a country. An absurdity for a common person.

“I am just a man, these numbers are those of a province budget, to say at least.“  
He was well paid when he was Colonel, when Bradley was still alive, even better now that he got the promotion. But what lingers in front of his eyes..this goes past every common sense “Why all this..why is on my behalf?”  
“For the same reason which brought me here, Roy”.  
Henry starts displaying another set of photos on the desk, one by one, slowly. He doesn’t waste time commenting them.  
The photos are more severe from those before, official picks, one might say looking at them, like those Ling sent Edward in one of Alphonse’s letters.  
Some men and women he doesn’t recognize, but the photos are yellowed enough to guess they are older than Henry. Two of them though bright with vivid and more recent elegance. His grandfather, who he saw in the other photos, and his mother.  
He is standing up, clothes in precious robes, a hand on his daughter’s shoulder. She is sitting on a chair, as elegant as her father. The dim lights of the saloon, which Roy recognize from some of the memories he retrieved with Edward’s help, can’t tone down the glimmering of two rich crowns on their heads. His grandfather’s is simple, a golden band with some gems. His mother’s is an intricated masterpiece, worth of a future queen.  
A shiver runs down and backwards Roy’s back. In the back of his mind he registers Edward’s focus on the emotional crackdown he is having. God knows, he is probably one second from storming into the room demanding for Henry’s head. But Roy can’t even remember how to breath normally right now so he might as well take the chance. He tries to calm down and not give Edward any reason.  
Wealth beyond every imagination.  
A family running away but willing to come back.  
Crowns.

Henry’s comprehensive voice thunders in his head like a sentence.

“Yours is not just a family. And you are not just a man.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeaaaaaah!!!!  
> So. I bet you wanna know what Ed and Madam talk about! But it will take some more time to find out. And yes, Roy is not just prince of our hearts. He's ROYalty. (and I can dig my grave after this XD)  
> More seriously, thank you all for your comments/kudos/hugs , they have helped a lot through this month. Exam went fine, now I'm in for internship/stage and help me Godness. Let me know your thoughts/hopes for Roy and Ed!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALERT: some minor angst but the plot (/evil me) required it.

 

 

 

Edward was helping Ilmes with a warrant about Xingan imported food gone rotten when he got the call.

 

Just the time to run down the aisles and go upstairs, trying his best to concentrate on Roy. Hard when you need to dodge colleagues and walls. And he is in the office, catching up his breath and sitting down at the desk nearest to the door.

 

Keep up appearances and shit.

 

Riza walks closer and lets a paper on his desk to read. No risk to be heard. Just in case.

 

Entered ten minutes ago. Brought a bag. Not wearing a gun. Booked an appointment with him through regular channels. Name: Hector Pariwell.

 

Several minutes pass, more than Edward would allow if it wasn’t for Roy’s feeble reassuring vibes.

 

Which, however, become weaker and weaker all of sudden, until Edward is left with a sense of confusion. The perception between them got ..foggy.

 

Is it because of Roy? Why can’t he read him as usual?

 

He is about to storm inside when a series of sounds announces them they are done.

 

He has his eyes on the first report he can find on the desk – Riza looks busy as well- when the door opens. He makes his eyes wander on the person who has been causing so much distress to the man he loves.

 

He pictured him different, in some way. Roy described him, sure.

 

But the man beside Roy acts like a man who is about to reach his goal. And it means trouble. Edward doesn’t need his instinct to see that.

 

What the Madam told him sufficed. He was willing to tell Roy they met but in the end he fell asleep waiting for him to come back from the banquet and in the morning he thought against it. Roy would not take it bad but it’s a hard topic nevertheless, especially first thing in the morning.

 

The man is speaking, “A pleasure as always. See you soon, _General_.”

 

Henry – Hector, whatever – doesn’t offer his hand to shake but he bends imperceptibly toward the receiver of his words, before nodding at them as goodbye and walking out of the room. Edward is about to follow him outside, and he is quite sure Riza is moving as well when a sign from Roy makes them stand down.

 

Why the fucking hell is he free to go?

 

They stare at Roy but neither of them dares to attack him right away to discuss the decision because he looks on the verge to throw up. And for the first time in months, Edward can’t tell the reason. Whatever they talked about, it unsettled Roy.

 

Edward speaks without looking away from him.

 

“Riza, can you phone the kitchen downstairs and ask for something warm to drink, other than coffee. Maybe something to eat, too. Anything will do.”

 

She nods, but can’t help a worried glance toward Edward, who reaches Roy in a couple of paces.

 

“Roy..”. Dozens of questions push on his tongue to free themselves but all he does is gently cupping the other hip and search for any sign of acknowledgement from the other man.

 

Roy just takes his flesh hand in his own. He brushes his thumb on Ed’s knuckles before interlacing their fingers. In lieu of answering, he stays put, at loss of words.  
“Are you ok?”

 

Roy is about to move his lips, to say something, but then he thinks against it and simply shakes his head.

 

Edward grabs his hand more firmly and steps inside the inner office, dragging Roy with him. Roy lets go and goes sitting on the couch.

 

They both can hear Riza at the phone, cancelling or moving the next appointment, in order to spare Roy the duty. She is always one step ahead when it comes to these things.

 

She joins them and Edward can’t really bring himself to delay the questions ramming through his head.

Several files are scattered on the desk. Definitely not military material.

 

“What happened? Fuck, why are we letting him go?”

 

“What should I do? Arrest him?” Roy asks, not aiming to answer Edward’s direct question but more like he was debating it out loud. Edward answers back anyway, “That would be a start”.

 

“Then I would probably be arrested along with him”

 

Both Riza and Edward stiff at the statement. “The hell are you talking about?”

 

 

 

Roy shows them the photos, the papers, everything Henry gave him.

 

He feels extraneous to the actions of his body while doing so. But maybe it’s just his mind’s method to cope with the shock. He can’t even read Edward that well, to be honest, and probably Edward got nervous for the same reason, suddenly feeling off.

 

“Is this even real?” Edward lets out after running through most of the material. “I mean, I thought they were just stories”.

 

Riza comes in his help, while Roy loses himself in one of the photos.

 

“History tells us Amestris has been victim of a brutal tyranny once. But history is written by winners and once the military took over power, most of that period’s references might have been intentionally ignored or destroyed. If we want to be objective, we could simply say our country was once a monarchy, like Xing and Aerugo. But I don’t know much more than that.”

 

Edward voices his next thoughts. “And probably Central Library can’t help either this time. It’s like if they wanted to erase even the memory of it. Not knowing means people would never rebel against a system they thought to be the only system. And the Dwarf didn’t need riots while he was getting everything in place for..”

Edward stops midsentence, snapping toward Roy, his eyes lightening with awareness. “Wait! Do you think it might be linked to their-“

 

“Possibly” the other man admits with a heavy tone.

 

There is a knock at the outer door and Edward gets up before Riza can even move and goes himself to retrieve the tray. He walks in with a frown on his face.

 

“Did you guys bribe the kitchen’s ladies and I wasn’t informed?”. The simple request of some food leaded to a tray full of sandwiches, fruit, cake -good cake- and hot tea and juice. When the guys from Investigations ask for something, they have to deal with crumbles in comparison.

 

“It started a couple years ago.” Riza explains shrugging, “Probably it’s just their way to show gratitude for everything that happened.”

 

“Eat” Edward shovels a sandwich in Roy’s hand but he refuses. He just picks some grape to save himself from Edward’s worries.

 

“What does he want from you?” Riza voices both her and Ed’s worries.

 

Roy sights. He knew they have been wanting to ask it since Henry left, but he is on denial himself about the topic.

 

“For me to take my rightful place”, he lets out, flat.

 

“Your _what_?” It’s Riza to exclaim.

 

“They want to restore monarchy in Amestris.” He reveals, walking next to the window. “Chris clearly was against it and hided me”.

 

He turns to face them. Riza is visibly in shock, while Edward hasn’t talked yet. Strange. He is looking at him with a glare difficult to read, even for him.

 

But maybe it’s just because of his current state. He can’t even count on the bond. It turned off, to some extent. Is it because he can’t find the courage to tell him what-

 

Riza interrupts his thought. “How did he find you?”

 

He looks outside once again. Some comrades are running across the main square, looking for a shelter from the heavy rain.

 

“His men kept looking for a little boy among rich families and wealthy areas – the capital, the main cities of the country – and never got anything. An orphan raised in a brothel was hardly interesting. Years passed and most of them gave up the chance to find me and cash in the reward Henry offered. Until two years ago. One of them saw me on the newspapers. And well, ..”

 

Edward’s forehead is marked with a serious frown, clearly elaborating all the information he just revealed them. He opens his mouth to speak and a part of Roy wonders if he has already understood he has kept the last part of his conversation with Henry for himself, too afraid to deal with the truth. But he can’t find out. The outer door bangs open and the sound of heavy shoes announces someone. It’s Havoc to come in, dripping water and concern. Outside the weather has been getting worst with the passing of the hours. The three of them were just too focused on the storm raging inside to care.

 

“I’ve just arrived. I’m sorry to interrupt but there is a situation downtown. The raining won’t stop and one of the drains flooded. The wall next to it broke and there is an institute that-“

 

“Let’s go. This can wait” Roy shakes his head tiredly. He barely touched food, Edward realizes. He sustains his concerned glare as they prepare to exit the office.

 

It’s just work and they can talk tonight but their connection is acting up and down and there is clearly something off with Roy. He can’t leave him like this.

 

“Riza” He calls for Hawkeye as he follows the two men on the way out, “Phone the Labs and tell them I’ll be late. I’m going with him”.

 

 

 

By the time they fix the damage and secure the area, most of the day is gone. If it isn’t enough, forecast said the raining is expected to carry on during the next days, too. Their problems are far from over.

 

Edward is under one of the tents trying to get clean from the mud when Roy joins him, after another check on the injured. He looks drained. Worse, wild in showing his emotions, whereas he is always composed.

 

“Are you ok?” Roy asks.

 

“Just covered in mud.”

 

All he wants right now is dragging Roy home and fix whatever’s wrong with them. All he can feel at the moment is an obnoxious buzz. But soldiers are walking all around them and he just can’t bring himself to put Roy in a difficult position. He feels his eyes darkening with distress at the thought of holding back, of hiding. But he has to.

 

“Listen…I’ve just got a call from the Headquarters. Haruko wants to see me, urgently. Probably looking for a report on the situation. It won’t take long.”

 

“I’ll go check the Labs then. Wait for me at the office?”

 

A glimpse of a smile flashed on Roy’s lips.

 

“Sure”

 

And he is gone before Edward can ask him back,

_Are you gonna be ok?_

 

 

 

“General Mustang”. Haruko’s wife is waiting for him on the doorstep of their house. He was initially surprised when the private headed for the residence instead of the Headquarters but then he recalled the Fuhrer taking the day off. The happenings of the morning seem ages far, and yet he feels just as crushed. Could it be just a terrible, impossible dream? No, it isn’t, he thinks, as the woman closes the door behind them.

 

“Are you all right?” she asks, willing to take his soaked coat. He needs a second too much to answer back.

 

“Yes, sorry.” He apologizes, handing it over “It’s a mess.”

 

“Don’t worry. He’s waiting for you.”

 

He is about to follow her but she doesn’t move to show him the way inside the house.

 

“Madam?”

 

She catches a strand of hair and adjusts it back, nervously. “Mustang. My husband’s job…it demands a lot.” She pauses but he doesn’t dare to interrupt her in any way. She seizes him and continues, “Sometimes you have to choose the hard way. And sometimes you are not even given a choice, even if he likes to say it’s just an elegant way out for most people. He is not. I’d like for you to remember it when you speak with him. Promise me”

 

Roy stares back at her, sincerely alerted by the woman’s words.

 

“You have my word.”

 

 

 

 

Her shoulders relax a bit, showing how much it costed to her to talk. “Follow me.”

 

They go into the house, passing past a few rooms. Roy has never been here before, so he can just follow the woman down the aisles, now wondering what the meeting really is about. Haruko’s wife is walking ahead of him. The hair, light brown, are dressed in a bun. She is about fifty-five. If she were alive, his mother would be about her age-

 

“Mustang?”

 

She stopped beside a closed door. He looks up at her and nods. She knocks and opens the door.

 

“He is here”. She steps back outside and waits for him to enter before closing the door. Leaving the two of them alone.

 

Roy expected some studio, or a saloon for a more informal meeting.

 

 

He certainly didn’t expect to be received in a bedroom.

 

Haruko is looking at him from the bed. He is sitting, leaning against the pillowed headboard.

 

He must be showing all his astonishment for the unusual situation because Haruko raise an eyebrow as he greets him.

 

“Mustang, you look exhausted. Sit down”. A seat has been placed next to the bed before his arrival. And some food has been placed on the bed stand. It’s untouched.

Haruko follows his eyes, observing his reactions. “Take some. I asked for it. Guessed you would be hungry after running the emergencies op all day.”  
In fact, he hasn’t eaten nothing since the morning. Except for some fruit back at the office. He was too agitated to keep anything down. Still is. All he wants is just go home, close everything outside. But even in that case, what Henry-

 

“Mustang?”

 

“No. No, thank you. I’m not hungry.”

 

He can’t think about it. Because thinking about it means Edward will know what else Henry told him and..  
“Sir, why did you summon me?” he asks cutting down the trail of his thoughts and focusing on Haruko instead. He sits down on the chair and glances at him.

 

“I’m sorry for the short notice. You are probably dead tired. I have meant to talk to you for some time now, about something. It never felt the right moment. But I suppose it was just my way to delude myself.”

 

“I..am afraid I don’t understand, Sir.”

 

Haruko is lying in bed. And despite his reassuring behaviour, the shadows under his eyes tell another story. It’s not much different from the other days, maybe they’re just a little more marked. But seeing him like this in this contest rather than in the office. It changes everything.

 

“When I told I was going to ask you a lot I meant it. But there is something I haven’t told you. One year ago, I have been diagnosed with a disease. Not a transmissible one. Nor curable, unfortunately. I kept it a secret so far but the last days caused me difficulties beyond my capacities.”

 

Haruko’s words are met with dead silence.

 

He’s heard what the man in front of him said. Just, the words sound wrong. He can’t understand the sense of them. A part of him knows it’s not like that.

 

He doesn’t want to understand. Just like he doesn’t want to understand what Chris has been hiding from him, and why... But Haruko is talking again.

 

 

“I hope you won’t judge me poorly for keeping it from you. In fact, I have the greatest trust in you. That’s why you are here.” He pauses but Roy is unable to contribute to the conversation in any capacity. He just shakes his head to let him continue.

 

“When I promoted you, I did it with one purpose. You didn’t need the promotion. Not as a help to distinguish yourself from the rest of the brass. The country loves you and so do the ranks. You inspired them long before your most recent acts. But you needed the position because I wanted you to be ready for the next step. Which brought me to rely on you more and more.”

 

Haruko’s discourse clicks in Roy’s head. This time he speaks.

 

“You sent me instead of you..”.

 

The other man nods. “Briggs. It was supposed to be an exam. Which no one could have passed with more elegance, to be fair. You are the best chance for our people.”

 

Roy can’t believe what Haruko is saying. Rather, what he hasn’t said. Which in the end, is what he is saying above everything else.

 

Popularity, trust, experience, people backing you up among the ranks. If you are a Colonel, those are great promises for the future. A distant future. They are seeds. For a General though..

 

 

For a General relocated in Central, one who gets to work shoulder to shoulder with the Fuhrer..

 

 

It gives him all the chrisms one could dream of.

 

Except, a high rank soldier is expected to win the majority plus one of the votes from the Assembly. Assembly made of the totality of the Generals of Amestris. The four main Generals, from East, West, South and North, and all the other generals below them.

 

“That’s..not how it works. Besides-“. He tries to voice how absurd it all sounds to him, but Haruko smiles at him. There is no joking nor malice in it.

 

“You already did it Roy. A year ago, I had to tell Grumman and Armstrong about my condition. As a matter of national security, someone needed to know, in case something happened before time. And they agreed with me what was best. Who was. Grumman is going to support you, no conditions attached. Armstrong too. Even if she might cash some favour about a displacement in the East, I believe. Sloane is not an issue. And Arren, you won his trust yourself, whatever the problem was. The Fuhrer needs the votes from the generals of the five districts. You have them. They will convince most of their men to vote for you, if those are fool enough to have doubts. And I made myself clear with the various parts involved here in Central that I supported you as next Fuhrer.”

 

 

 

Haruko’s wife’s words make now sense. He planned it all. All this months, he has been preparing the whole play just for him to win. Along with others. And he didn’t saw it coming. Not a clue.

 

 

“It nice to know even you can run out of words from time to time.” Haruko indulges in a grin.

 

 

And now it just takes one more move. The illness is going to oblige him to leave the place. And he’d thought about the aftermath.

 

“Are you going to resign?”

 

Haruko’s smile tightens, in the wrong way. “I won’t need to.”

 

And it’s like being punched in the stomach.

 

“How-how long..?”

 

 

“The doctor says I have days left at best.” He sounds almost peaceful about it. It makes it even worse.

 

 

“Sir..I. I can’t-“

 

Roy rapidly runs the numbers in his head. Days left mean a couple of weeks if they are lucky. Then there is official mourning which would be at least another week. And then consultations for the Fuhrership. Considering what Haruko said, almost a month.

 

Shock washes momentarily away everything else.

 

 _‘As I told you, you might face some surprises during the next weeks.’_  
Henry told him before they exited his office. He thought it was just talking, but now they taste with terrific certainty.

 

Henry _already knows_ about it, doesn’t he?

 

 

“Mustang, I know. I know I’ve just loaded a burden on your shoulders. It’s no secret you aim for the position but that’s not why I pledged for you. You are a good man and you will do good to the country. I tried my best. I am asking you to do the same.” Haruko is trying to reassure him, unaware of the turmoil

 

Did Henry find out the Fuhrer is dying? That’s what he was referring to? Roy’s head is cracking and yet he listens at what Haruko is telling him.

 

“I’ll wait until the end of the week before making an official announcement about my conditions. Everything is going to be fine. I dealt with it, as I told you. But you should prepare yourself to be under the media’s spot soon. Even I can’t help it.”

 

“I don’t know what to say”

Everything is going too fast. Haruko should have more time. He needs time to sort out things. This, his past, his parents. And..

 

“Go now. Take a good night of sleep. My secretary will hand over to your Lieutenant my schedule for you to take over. I’ll phone you tomorrow so that we can check it together.”

 

“May I..May I come over instead?” He looks up at Haruko again. He feels compelled to do something, even something so irrelevant. “If I don’t dist-“

 

“No, not at all. I’ll be here” Haruko sounds relieved at those words.

 

Roy stands up. However, he can’t bring himself to turn and step out of the room yet.

 

“Sir..is there anything..anything at all..”.

 

Haruko sights and a warm smile gives him some colour. “I hoped you’d ask.”

 

 

 

A few minutes later Roy finds himself in the cab, rushing through Central under the thunderous rain. Inside the car, buried in the worn-out seat, it rains as well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“He is fine, don’t worry”.

 

Edward can just guess how much she has been worrying over the last weeks.

 

They called each other by their given names, she was always presented as his aunt, but the truth was the Madam has always been a mother to him.

 

He closes the distance between them. “We need to talk.”  
Chris seizes him trying to deduce all she can, before inviting him in. He silently follows her across the busy pub to the back shop.

 

“Can you do what you did the last time?” she asks, pragmatic as always. “There are far too many ears around for my tastes”.

 

He complies right away. The transmutation goes off silently, isolating the room.

 

“We are on our own now.” He sighs heavily “I have to tell you, I need to be back within midnight, he’s out for a banquet but will be back home by then.”

 

“What do you want?” she asks wary and it’s clear as day that she is still angry at him for what happened. For all she knows, it’s all his fault if Roy found out.

 

He ignores the question and instead starts explaining her what he knows so far. “Almost three months ago the Fuhrer sent Roy in North City for the general exercitations. While he was there he was approached by a man who pretended to know his parents.”

 

Chris face has gone white as he spoke and he can see her fear mingling with grief.

 

“He came back and pretended it was all right. But I was worried and decided to check his personal file without telling him first. That’s how I found out it was false.”

 

“Who was he? Who Roy talked with?” she demands with a steel voice.

 

“A man, about your age. Called himself Henry.”

 

 

Chris eyes rage with fury.

 

 

“You know him”

 

 

Chris lips are sealed as she scrutinizes Edward once more. He groans exasperated.

 

“For fucks sake, _I love him_. Are you still doubting me?” He feels his cheeks firing up but ignores it. 

 

“What happened to you and my son?” she asks sharply.

 

It’s Edward’s turn to be taken by surprise.

 

After all, he is asking for trust and the Madam doesn’t like to bargain for free. She knows there is something strange going on between them and wants to know.

 

“It’s not just my story to tell.” He weights what he can tell for now. “Last summer, the kidnapping at the Headquarters. Roy was shot”. Chris twitches on her seat. “I saved him and something else happened as result. The rest of it, I’d like for Roy to tell you, when he is ready”.

 

The woman’s eyes grieve at his words. “He hates me. With good reason. He won’t forgive me.”

 

“Maybe. Or maybe he’s just stubborn as you.”  
Stupor lingers on her feature and something like proudness.

 

“I’m gonna do anything to keep him safe, just like I always did. But I need your help as well.”

 

She thinks about it for a moment before agreeing with him.  
“Henry is not his name. I can’t tell for sure if he’s who I think he is. But if you are saying he’s in Amestris, I’m going to find out and confirm it to you. Anyway, these people might seem harmless. They are not. They are interested in Roy but anyone else meddling with their plans is just a weight to get rid of.”

 

“What do they want from him?”. That’s the whole reason which leaded him at the pub after accessing Roy’s latest memory. If they wanted something so badly to spend their lives after it, they needed to know.

 

“To be someone else.”

 

She doesn’t explain herself any further and instead decided to pray him, “Edward, you have to promise me. Whatever happens, whatever he finds out, don’t let them have him.”

 

He can’t help a frown. “Can’t you be more specific? What do you mean?”

 

She lays back against the seat. “As you told before, this is not my story. It’s Roy’s. If I tell someone first, it has to be him.” And the strenght in her statement tells Edward he won't get anything else out of her.

 

“Fine. So..what do we do?”

 

“I have old friends over the border. It’s about time I cash in some favours. Believe me, I’ve been planning for this my whole life. I’m gonna crush them all.”

 

He checks the time. “Better go now. I’ll be back if something changes.”

 

“Edward”. He stops and looks down at her.

 

“Thank you.”

 

She seems more relaxed but Edward knows better. They are alike in that way. She is preparing for a fight.

 

“No need, Madam”.

 

She snorts and stand up as well.

 

“I think you can call me Chris by now, don’t you think?”

 

He waves his hand, already heading for the door, when a thought strikes him. He turns back to her.

 

 

 

 

Maybe he shouldn’t be the one asking.

 

 

 

 

He does anyway.

 

 

 

 

“You told us Roy’s mother died in order to let you run away.”

 

 

 

 

Her eyes darken a bit at the words. She nods.

 

 

 

 

 

“How did it happen?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Spring to you all!  
> Here -Italy- weather is rather chilly but I have tea :3  
> Long chapter because there is a lot going on!!!  
> I love fics with Haruko playing the bad guy, but at the same time I needed to give him some kind of redemption (?)..I don't know. Anyway, for those confused, I pictured Haruko being a little older than canon, around sixty-ish, all good and paternal. Hope you like it. And sorry again for the angst.  
> I'll make up for it :D


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I planted a lot of flowers to help my dear bees to survive and I can't wait to see Infinity War and ohmydeargodpleasedon'tletanybodydie. Ok, I'm fine. I'M fINe.
> 
> So...about the chapter. very long, a lot to talk about, I hope it's ok, I'll check it tomorrow/asap  
> Notes for the reading: "Speech" vs 'Thoughts'/ Memories (Italic) 
> 
> (* w *'''')

 

 

 

“Where have you been?” Philip asks as soon as soon as Edward steps in, just to raise in voice in weak disappointment. “You are getting mud all over the place! Did you jump in a lake?”

 

Edward accepts the Lab shoes Philip is offering him. “I’ve been downtown the whole day. A main drain crushed and the block got flooded with all this shit.”

 

“Has anyone ended up in hospital?”

 

Edward nods as he gets rid of the jacket too. “Nothing serious, this time. It could have ended worse.” In the while he moves to pick up a chalk from the table and starts drawing on the floor. He collects both items and places them and places them inside the circle.

 

“What the hell Ed?”

 

“I’m cleaning them.”

 

“Well, once you have finished, you’ve got mail. They delivered it this morning.”

 

Edward doesn’t waste time and sits down at his desk. Finally, Al’s letter.

 

If he is lucky, Al would have been home within a month or two. He explained in the previous letter that it was the best moment to cross the desert.

 

 

 

_Brother,_

_What the hell is wrong with you?! Of course, you should have explained it immediately! Please, I know you: don’t push yourself too much. I hope Roy will hold you back. You can’t tell me what it’s related to, which tells me all I need to know. Please be careful._

_And about what you are doing, I found a reference in a manual about Xingan dream interpretation. The author wrote that sometimes lovers can sense each other through sleep , but not like in the old days, when the enoneis lived in Xerxes. I spent the next two days looking for some reference. May helped too. It’s similar to some Xingan dialects next to the border. We think enoneis might mean something along the line of “melting, merging”. At first, I thought it was the end of it. But then old librarian Qwen overheard us. We told him what we were reading about – not the whys, don’t worry- and he explained us that in his hometown, in the south, they still remember a story about two Xerxenian who travelled past the desert and settled with them. They tell the story whenever there is a marriage, it’s kind of a tradition. They remember them because the woman got kidnapped by a rival tribe. They brought her to the capital, in order to offer her to the emperor. But her partner knew exactly where she was, how she was, and followed the kidnappers along with some Xingan friends. They found her the night before the exchange and saved her. The end of the story is a little bloodier but I spare you the details for now. Old Qwen insisted to provide us a book with the whole story but I don’t think I will find more about it._

_So I’ve been wondering..what if you two are like them? Maybe you are developing a really strong bond, more than average?_

_I also investigated about what you told me about Lokan being away among a community of emigrants, even if you’ll disapprove. Some members of the Shang clan told May they still have records of an ancient of Xerxenian refugee they used to trade with. There is no one left now but they lived in Creta, next to the border. We could check if they left anything written about it. Maybe we are lucky._

_I’ll leave the capital within a week so this is my last letter. And yes, May is coming, too. We should be able to cross the desert and reach the border within a month. I’ll call you as soon as I can find a phone._

_Why is Winry writing me about being back before next spring?_

_See you soon_

_Al_

 

 

 

“ _Winry_ ”, he hisses, fazed.

 

With all the problems they are facing right now, coming outs, datings and above all…proposals fall at the end of their list of priorities. Which makes Edward even more..

 

“What’s with those sad eyes?”

 

Philip might have promised to stand down, but even he can’t help to observe him closely.

 

“Just tired. Al is coming back. Next month”. Philip flashes a smile at the news. “That’s great, I’ll finally get to know him. Between you and the chimeras, I feel like I already know him.”

 

Edward’s head jerks up at the words, surprised.

 

“What? Heinkel and Darius?”

 

“Yeah. We’ve been working together for some time now. When I’m not here, I mean. Don’t forget I’m a biologist, Ed. I’m trying to find a cure. If they will want it, it’s their choice, but it’s not just about them, unfortunately.”

 

“That’s- fuck, it’s great, why didn’t you tell me?”

 

“I thought I did. But I told Russel for sure, he gave me some interesting insight” Philip smiles fondly as he resumes his work. Edward approaches to the common desk.

 

“He is good in that field. How is it going with your stuff?” He asks, glancing at the other’s papers on the table, trying to distract himself from the never stopping nerves he has been dealing with since this morning, unable to sense Roy the way he should.

 

“As soon as I finish these, I’ll devote myself to the book and the sphere. I’m dying to start with them.”

 

“You managed to keep your hands off the whole time”. He has never been patient in his whole life.

 

“Yep. I’m Mr.Discipline” Philip knowingly mocks him.

 

Anthony knocks at the door of the office. “Guys, one of the writings on the sword I have on the table doesn’t match with the syllabus. Look”, he shows the paper he is holding to Philip to see. The man shrugs before speaking. “Try with this.” He pops out a book from under his desk. “These syllabi are rarer but it’s worth a try”. The researcher leaves in hurry, to examine the new manual.

 

Edward follows him with his eyes before resuming his conversation with Philip.

 

“If I were you, I’d have thrown everything away and started with those.” Edward admits with a huff. “Talking about which, where are they?”

 

“The sphere must be in one of those boxes. The book is on the table over there, take a look”

 

Edward gets up from his sit and steps closer. He would gladly take a look at the sphere. It still intrigues him that it stayed silent at his transmutations months ago and it could help him to not think about what happened in the morning. He only hopes the talk he had with the Madam is gonna help in all this.

 

God, shock is one thing but it has been literally hours. Why can’t he sense Roy’s state yet?

 

And above everything else, he feels out-of-phase. The same feeling you experience when you take painkillers. Pain doesn’t disappear by magic. Instead, it fades away, just enough to make you wonder if, once the drugs run out, you will feel better. Or worse.

 

In the afternoon he kept experiencing it but dealing with the emergency took most of the day. And Edward certainly couldn’t check on Roy the way he was willing to with a quarter of Central’s soldiers walking around them. And then Haruko called. That man had the worst timing ever.

 

He reaches to grab the book when he hears a car door shutting closed. He freezes, taken by surprise.

 

“Did you hear it?” Edward asks Philip.

 

“Hear what?”

 

Maybe it’s just tiredne -

 

Something brushes against his cheek and before he knows it, his hand comes to get rid of whatever landed on his face.

 

Except nothing did. His fingers are wet. A single tear found his way down his left eye.

 

“Ed?” Philip tries to get his attention again but in vain.

 

 

 

_“Shit”_

 

 

He runs back at the desk - the book forgotten where he found it - and ignores Philip’s alarmed gestures as he dials the number by memory. They pick up almost immediately.

 

“General Must-“

 

“It’s me”

 

“Edward, I heard the others. They told you-“

 

“Yeah. I’m at the Labs now. Riza, where is he?” he asks with urgency.

 

“He had a meeting with the Fuhrer.”

 

“Can you please check?”

 

“Give me a minute. I’ll put you on hold”

 

Philip has abandoned his work and joined him in the wait. It’s clear he wants to ask what’s going on but he is waiting for Ed to hang up. Antony is coming in to ask something else but Philip gestures him to leave immediately. He mouths to him, ‘Everything all right?’

 

Edward simply shakes his head. His heartbeat is going crazy and he fucking knows it’s not him. And his arm is warming up. The mark.

 

“Edward?” Riza is back on line.

 

“Yes”

 

“I thought they would meet in the Fuhrer office. But Haruko sent a private to escort Roy at his residence. I called, and they told me he left about ten minutes ago. Ed are you all right? I’m going to go looking for-”

 

“No need. He’s heading home.” He realized it the moment the words let his mouth. Just like he knew where Roy was at the party the night of his promotion. Al’s words echo with terrible precision in his head. But right now he has no time to process them.

 

“How do you-“

 

“I don’t know. Listen, I’ll call you in the morning, I have to-”

 

“Of course. Go, go”

 

He hangs up immediately after and turns toward Philip, who precedes him.

 

“Whatever it is, go. We’ll talk later”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite the run in the cab, the few meters between the car and the door are enough to wash him completely. The walkway resounds with rapid splashes.

 

The lights are all off. He turns up the one in the entrance and in the aisle, but doesn’t bother taking off his shoes as he walks inside, looking for Roy.

 

He finds him in the studio. The light from the aisle gives him a first glimpse on Roy’s state. The coat lies next to the doorframe, soaked as well. His owner is sitting with his back against the oak desk. The trousers are beyond saving, after the day they had. And the shirt - whose sleeve must have been rolled up at some point - is dampened as well and raises in rapid movements along with the frantic motion of Roy’s chest.

 

Edward turns up the room’s light.

 

Roy’s eyes are red from crying and even if he isn’t now, it’s clear he reached his limit after whatever happened at the Fuhrer’s residence.

 

“Can you get up?” Edward murmurs quietly as he approaches, trying to read him through their bond. The other man obliges immediately but doesn’t abandon the desk. He looks at Edward and tries to sweep the tears away scrubbing both his eyes and taking a deep breath.

 

“Hi”

 

It’s more a muffle than anything else and his voice is quivering so much that Edward is compelled to give him some immediate comfort. “Ehi” He brushes his hands on the other’s arms, the same kind of movement you do when someone needs to be warmed up. Roy needs more than that obviously, because he hugs him tightly instead, burying his face between Edward’s neck and his flesh shoulder.

 

 

“What’s going on?”

 

No answer. Just the sound of labored breath in his ear and the tickling of black hair against his skin. He gulps, a knot in his throat as he tries again.

 

“Roy, talk to me”

 

Edward thinks he is not gonna answer at all, when a weak sound escapes from Roy.

 

“He-“

 

Edward waits for more and when the other doesn’t continue, he guesses encouraging him to open up.

“Haruko?”

 

Roy nods, distancing with a tired glare. “He is dying”.

 

Of all the things the other man could have guessed.

 

“ _What?_ ”

 

He murmurs and it seems so stupid to ask again when he heard it perfectly the first time.

 

“He is ill. Has days left.” He scrubs a hand on his mouth.

 

“I am sorry..I don’t-”

 

_I don’t understand, I don’t feel you, I don’t know what to say, I don’t-_

 

“He wants for me to take over the Fuhrership”, he continues, synthetic.

 

Awareness sinks in Edward’s brain, the various pieces finally matching, as Roy observes him.

 

“He was training you..”. Why didn’t he smell it? Neither did Roy, though. “All.. . the meetings and the trip in the North..” And he got the whys moving Haruko. That said, Roy explained him some time ago that it is a complicated matter. “But ..you should win the votes of the main generals and those-“

 

“He already did it. I have them all already, Edward”.

 

It is not a hypothetical course of events they are talking about here. It’s going to happen. For real.

 

Roy’s ragged breaths shake him as they turn into a strangled sight. He brought both hands on his face. If he’s doing it out of distress or to hide his emotion, it’s harder to say.

 

“Ehi, ehi” Edward comes to grab his hands out of his face and in his own. “You are going to be great.”

 

The man in front of him is reacting all in the wrong way. Although saddened by Haruko’s condition, he should be at least positive about the upcoming changes. Instead, his eyes are reddening again, breath short and widening pupils.

 

“No, Ed.” The man is shaking his head vigorously and continues in a frantic rhythm, “Not like this. I thought it was going to take some more years. And now..”. He breaks the contact with Ed and moves in slow paces around the room. A trapped animal.

 

 

 

“..you are debating it.”

 

 

 

 

Edward knew Roy has been adamant in his aim. Toward all the difficulties they had to go through, his will never wavered. The simple fact of hearing him talk like this makes a shiver run down his spine. One did as well when he found Roy in such a state as he came in and now he has confirmation of it. There is something very wrong going on.

 

 

 

“…Haruko thinks I am the right person for it. I am not.”

 

 

 

“What the hell? Why not?” He demands an octave higher than he wishes.

 

 

 

 

“Because of what we found out today”

 

 

 

 

“It doesn’t change anything Roy!”

 

 

 

 

 

“Of course it does!”

 

Other than Haruko’s revelation, and the happenings of the morning, there must be something else that made the difference between sadness, grief or stupor and what stands instead of them. Roy’s every gesture, every trait is dense with guilt and shame.

 

The veil wrapping Roy’s stream of emotions is slowly shattering, letting something through.

 

 

 

 

 

Guilt. Constriction. Pain. Confusion.

 

 

 

“What did that man tell you?”

 

 

 

 

“You know already.” Roy lowers his eyes, aware to sound rather unconvincing. His emotions already gave away he left something unsaid, until now, but pretending there in nothing to say still sounds better than face it. It would destroy that little of him that is left. He can’t bring himself to.

 

 

 

“No. What did he tell you to make you doubt yourself this way? Show me”. Edward runs to grab the other’s arm to stress the request.

 

 

Apparently, it just takes it to destroy Roy’s last defences.

 

The vision slams directly in front of him- of them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_“Your is not just a family, and you are not just a man”_

_“The Amestrian Crown was banished and a Military government took its place. The one you know, such as it is today. Your family found refuge in Creta. They already had assets out of the country. Just.. they couldn’t imagine they could be their salvation. A few of the cadet members died, accordingly to the old reports. As well as some of the aristocratic families who supported them. But the Crown survived. Until today” He shows Roy to an invisible public._

_Henry adjust on his seat, watching Roy’s unhidden astonishment._

_“I spent..years and years looking for you. Christine was aristocracy, just like me. Raised within every comfort and wealth. I never considered she could lower her standards to this point. Living among_ the worst scum _and dragging you with her. For what? Destiny has made it right for once.”_

_“It’s not -” Roy tries to speak but a knot in his throat is preventing him to do it properly._

_“Tell the way you prefer but she should have raised you in a more proper environment. Good schools, good friends and all of it. Fortunately, you understood soon enough what’s your place.”_

_“What is that supposed to mean?”_

_“Well. Look around us. You decided to put your time at good use._ The youngest General _of Amestris Military. Christine was wasting time trying to rewrite your past, I travelled everywhere looking for a boy and you made yourself a man, and made all the right choices to reach the top.”_

_“I…why are you telling me this?”_

_“It’s time for you to come back home. For real. You are the royal heir and we want for you to lay claim on the title that’s yours.”_

_“We?”_

_“The people loyal to the crown. To your family. To you. We are descendants from the families who followed yours into the exile. We want to come back too.”_

_“Amestris is a military republic” Roy lets out, gritting his teeth. Hector laughs mildly at the statement._

_“Yeah. And look how it worked out in the long run. A conspiracy let corrupted people to lead the country, starving people and making them live in terror. Now it seems the waters are calming down but calmer doesn’t mean better. Amestris wasn’t supposed to end like this“._

_“You know it and have been aiming for the highest position in the system you have known since you were a little child. You know, deep inside you, that that place was meant to be yours in the first place. That it’s yours to take.”_

_“What you are suggesting would imply a coup d’état.”_

_“No, it’s not. Your family was almost exterminated and couldn’t come back for decades. The country needs a fresh start, a trusted face. They would celebrate your return as king. And since you are one of the highest-ranking persons and the soldiers fight to work under you, it’s hardly possible there would be long fights over it. Tell me now, since the government has had condemned the story of monarchy, of our families, to oblivion, and common people don’t even dare to think about it as a possibility, is it right to keep lying in their faces? Just like Christine did with you?”_

_Every period Hector says lands profound wounds in the other’s certainly. Not that Roy is showing it to him. But having access to his memories makes it possible for Ed to read his emotions as well. The last few words have just brought into question every choice Roy has ever made. Every plan. Himself. And Roy was so good hearted he actually let Hector to instil in him enough doubts to leave him defenceless._

_“And what is it in there for you?” Roy asks after a long pause._

_“Apart from seeing you fulfil your destiny like your mother, before you, was supposed to?”_

_Hector continues speaking, knowing which buttons to push since the beginning. Edward is sure one hundred percent._

_“She was fragile, too sentimental to see the rightfulness of her place in this world. The chances she had to help her people. God help her, I miss her every day like the first one. But you are not her. You know what has to be done. You know who you are supposed to be.”_

_If Roy wants to ask more question, he is too in shock to do so. And the man knows he’s done his job. He moves from the chair._

_“I told you everything I had to. Now it’s right to leave you some time to think it over. Besides, I think you will find some interesting changes in the next weeks that will confirm everything I have been debating with you”_

_“I’ll be back in a week, ready to serve you, your Highness”_

 

After this, they step out of the door. Edward lets go of Roy. What happens next, he already knows.

 

 

 

No more in need to share the memory, Roy distances himself, his emotions a chaotic mass of hate for himself, anger, delusion, grief. Despair.

 

 

 

“I can’t do this.” The other man breaths out, looking at his own reflex in the window’s glass, lined with raindrops.

 

 

 

The younger man steps toward him,

 

 

 

 

“That’s not true and you know it. It’s just-”

 

 

 

“What am I supposed to do? Just..ignore it and accept the Fuhrership? Let people decide between government and monarchy? What if I become Fuhrer and it gets out about my family?”

 

“You are not thinking straight. You are tired and mourning-”

 

However, Roy is not willing to listen to what he has to say, in the midst of the crackdown he has been pushing down the whole day.

 

 

 

 

 

“What if he’s right? I longed for the highest position because of it? Am I that kind of person?”

 

 

 

 

 

Edward steps closer, throwing the jacket he has been holding on the couch.

 

 

 

 

“Stop it-”

 

 

“All of them are expecting something from me! To be a prince. To be a good general. To be the next Fuhrer. And everything comes up wrapped in secrets and I am sick of it. I..I don’t know who I am anymore. A guy who’s been raised in a brothel? One of my masks? The son of a princess? A mass murd-”

 

 

 

 

“I SAID STOP IT!”

 

 

 

 

 

They end up on the floor, Edward on the top of Roy, angry and gasping for breath. He grabbed the other’s button-up and kicked his heel, unbalancing him. Roy dragged him down, an arm on his back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Self-recrimination has been tilting inside Roy, one thought after another, and he can’t stand it. Watching him to hurt himself like this. And when he got where Roy’s mind and words were going, his arms moved and he pushed him without actually thinking.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It hurts.

 

 

 

 

 

But it hurts more to notice that Roy is just lying there, not complaining nor aching. Nothing.

 

 

 

 

He hasn’t even fought back, to escape from his grip. The sadness in his voice is a burden on Edward’s heart. Everything that happened in the last weeks broke Roy in so many pieces he’s lost the count

 

 

 

 

 

He murmurs, lost.

 

 

 

 

 

“Who am I, Ed?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edward knows the answer. But Roy is in no condition to listen. To understand him if he were to tell him with words. Because it’s not knowledge he is missing right now. He’s confused, he’s missing his aunt, even if he refuses to admit it and he is worried about what’s gonna happen to the country. He found a friend in Haruko, just to see him slipping away. He’s finding out things about his parents and grief, just like love, doesn’t fade out with the passing of time. There is no way to uproot the pain nor the sadness which those events brought and probably will bring. That’s not for Edward, or Roy, or anybody else to change. It’s not how it works. But he can stay by his side. To share. To support.

 

 

 

To show him.

 

 

 

Roy’s eyes are on him, defenceless and expectant. Edward lowers toward him, adjusting his legs, especially the metal one. Fuck, it must have hurt Roy has they fell. He sustains the glance, closing the distance between them until there is just enough space to steal a breath from each other’s lips.

 

 

 

 

“Ed..”

 

 

 

 

He brushes his lips against Roy’s cheek. It’s just a touch. His lips feel hot against the other’s skin, even if he’s the one who came in later. He pulls back, just enough to glance down at Roy.

 

 

 

 

“I’m going to show you”, he whispers.

 

 

 

 

 

He lowers once again, this time capturing his lips in a chaste kiss.

 

 

 

Edward kisses him before raising up just a little. His hair dangle messily around them. They are dampened here and there. He must have run home from the Labs, in hurry to find him.

 

Anytime he compliments Edward by calling him beautiful, the young alchemist shushes him in disagreement. What Roy means though, goes past the common ideal of beauty, which of course Edward isn’t exonerate, to begin with.

 

 

 

It is that secret mixture of him, made of stubborn and undefiant strength and wholehearted kindness, that makes him bright like fierce, unfading firelight.

 

That’s what made Roy fell. What makes him stand. What makes him live.

 

And right now, he’s the only light he has left to find his way back from the chill darkness bloomed in his heart.

 

 

 

 

 

Edward moves gently.

 

 

 

 

Because the Fullmetal Alchemist, demolisher of entire blocks at the time, he is always so incredibly gentle with him.

 

 

 

 

He always puts on a great façade while silently registering every need, every wish. Edward’s lips and hands find their place on him, warming him up one featherweight touch after another, like if he made a point of make him vibrate like the strings of a violin.

 

 

 

 

Edward is nipping at his upper lip, before brushing down one angle, his lips half parted. The pressure raises against his cheekbone before drawing complicated arrays of caresses down their way back down. Roy slowly relaxes a bit, his head beginning to buzz in a nice kind of way, like when he used to actually enjoy a drink, before Ishval. Is Edward doing that? He parts his lips and invites Edward to deepen his ministration, losing himself in the new inebriant sensation.

 

 

 

 

 

The kiss lasts just a couple of heartbeats. Edward pulls back once again, joining their forehead before breathing against his mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_“I know you”_

 

 

 

But it’s not just Edward’s voice Roy can hear. It echoes with a copy of it, resonating within his soul, if it is even possible to explain such a sensation with words alone.  
His eyes are still open, to see Edward upon him. However, his head fills with vivid images, memories Edward decided to share with him. It’s not just slides. They come with emotions, and feelings and..

 

 

The crack of his old office’s door, as Edward -still a young boy- storms inside, followed by a giant armour, Roy welcoming them. And all of them, laughing, and eating together in the office, and then driving in the car around the city.

When he told Edward to not give up. And Edward fighting against Father’s dolls and all of sudden, in the middle of his desperate attempts to just make it out alive, the burst of flames around him, a crushing rush of relief and affection at the realization it was Roy.

 

 

 

_‘You saved us’_

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edward at the Labs, hearing Roy giving the first public speech about the Reconstruction Plan for Ishval with a proud grin.

 

Riza serving Ed tea and telling him what Roy wants to do for Amestris.

He and Maes joking about something. Roy talking with his friend over the phone while Edward is looking at him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_‘You saved your country, you mourned your losses.’_

_‘You protect those who need protection. You make mistakes.'_

 

 

 

 

 

He sees himself through Edward’s eyes, bleeding on the floor after Lokan shot him.

 

Himself looking for revenge when Maes died. An afternoon they all spent playing outside with Elycia.

 

The moment he offered Edward a place to stay when he run to hide in his kitchen.

 

 

 

 

 

_‘You are kind and wise and selfless’_

 

 

 

 

A rapid series of scenes. Of him playing at poker with his aunt and the girls one night they spent at the pub. Of him working with Haruko. The party after the promotion. Himself with his team, with their friends.

 

When he gave the house’s keys to Edward.

 

The night he told him...

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You..are the man I love.” Edward’s voice -both of them - bring him back from the visions. A warm hand frames his jaw, waiting for him to fully come back.

 

 

When Roy makes contact again, it’s just to dive in a gold-melted glance, dense with care and protection and unrestrained love.

 

 

“ _Don’t you dare_ to forget any of it.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Once Edward saved his life, when he was bleeding to death on a floor.

 

Here he is again, spilling his soul instead. And Edward is saving him again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Something has just happened between them. Roy can feel it. They have both realized it.

 

It wasn’t just sharing a memory, or knowing if the other were having a bad day.

 

But processing it doesn’t seem even remotely as essential to him as reaching for Edward, helping himself sitting up with one arm and cupping the other’s jaw. This time they find each other trapped in a mouthful kiss, fierce and tender in equal measure. It just takes a moment to get lost in it, now that he found his way back to Ed and they can sense each other again, stronger than ever before.

 

 

‘ _I love you. A lot and more’_ , he thinks, without talking.

 

These words are just for Edward to cherish.

 

Edward’s hand run skilful upwards his neck column, to ravish his hair, willing to offer more contact, more everything. Roy swoops down on his mouth again, losing himself in the sensation as he carefully leans back, trying to drag Edward on the top of him. His head is spinning, fireworks are having their way in it and he gladly lets them.

 

His soul brushes against Ed’s, letting him know what he needs. What he wants with body and soul. What Edward alone can give him. The thought is steady and strong, so it’s not surprise it immediately finds his way to Ed.

 

Edward pulls back immediately in response to the sensation, just to stare at him in total amazement. He searches his eyes, doubt shadowing his traits, unsure of what to do. His lips are already swollen and wet. The tail has come completely undone and ..

 

He wants him. He wants Edward inside him.

 

Edward’s hesitation is out of care for him and nothing more, unwilling to give in to his own desires.

 

They never did it before, but he knows Edward has been willing to give it a try for some time now and never approached the topic. Sometimes Roy is amazed by how shyly he can behave despite the rough temper he shows to the world outside. One more pleasure just for himself.

 

Roy sustain the scrutinize for a single, decisive moment. A pained breath escapes from Edward, which gives Roy the only confirmation he wanted.

 

The older man attacks the other’s neck, traveling backwards to the earlobe and nibbling it.

 

A moan escapes from Ed’s lips, his breath speeding up as he gives in to Roy’s prayer.

 

There is nothing uncertain about the clash of their mouths, the tender affection of a few minutes before turned into a hot and blind need for closeness.

 

 

“Not-h-re..” Edward manages to whisper against his jugular.

 

 

“Don’t care”

 

_“No-t here”_

 

Edward murmurs again, more firmly, pulling him along as he starts moving from the floor.

 

They manage to stand up, never actually breaking apart for more than a couple of seconds.

 

Edward tugs his shirt again. They lose it before reaching the aisle, replaced by a cascade of eager touches. Edward’s follows shortly. Their movements are not rushed or offhand. It feels more like they’re synchronized on an even deeper level, a nice humming reverberating through them as they finally reach their bed. It’s not like other times. There is a further commitment in every shiver. In every move and breath. Now that they can melt with each other’s emotions unrestrictedly, it seems every inch of the other’s skin, every reaction, even the most insignificant, are new.

 

They lose the track of time cherishing each other until Edward moves to take some lube from the bed stand before kneeling on the edge of the bed.

 

He rapidly loses his pants and lays close to him, trembling with expectation.

 

And yet, he hesitates. Roy knows he’s worried about him. So he moves his hands on the sheets, then on the other’s fingers, until he reaches the leather armlet.

 

Edward lets himself be pulled closer as he sets between Roy’s legs with a sight which tastes of excitement and worry.

 

Roy unties it, then does the same with his own while Edward uses his freed arm to map his torso, from the collarbone down to his belly. It’s like being touched to the bone.

 

Roy curls his fingers around his wrist before he can go further and make him come as they are, and brings it against his lips instead.

 

 

 

Edward seems on the verge of combustion, torn between Roy’s request and his own considerations. And his eyes go definitely feral when Roy decides to leave a mouthful kiss right on his mark.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Love me, Ed”

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is the space of heartbeat, where they both stay still, in wait.

 

 

 

 

 

A heartbeat. That’s all it takes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Than Edward is on the top of him, pinning him down with his body and the bed complains but neither of them cares enough to listen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edward makes a point of stealing from him every breath he can spear, as they chaotically get rid of the rest of the clothes.

 

 

 

 

The other’s hand urgently comes to cup both their cocks as Roy moans shamelessly. The heat of skin brushing against skin is intoxicating.

 

 

 

 

 

Ed silences him sealing their lips together and no one should be able to use their tongue the way he does. He’s implacable.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That’s why the older man arches, and grabs his soulmate’s shoulders to bring him closer.

 

 

 

 

Edward shudders and..he lets go. Roy is about to substitute him in his ministration when a sweated hand grabs both his wrist and brings them above his head. The further friction between their bodies silences any complain he might have been thinking and has him jerking forward.

 

 

 

There is no need for words. The way they sense each other makes up for them. When Roy arches up Edward Is already there, pulling him tighter with his arm, when Edward would like his hair being pulled a little rougher and he’s being satisfied right away.

 

Edward moves, lost in the response he gets from Roy, who lets out the most delightful moaning as he takes all the time in the world to prepare him.

 

 

 

 

And when Edward finally fulfils Roy’s prayer and slides into him, so slowly and so perfectly, the bliss almost knocks him off. As for Roy, his eyes are half dimmed, so lost in them that he has no perception of how loud and blissed he is sounding.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And he can barely think of anything else than move deeper inside Roy.

 

 

 

Roy tightens the grip on his thigh, encouraging him to go ahead, letting out a loud cry when Edward starts touching his hardness and pulling in.

 

 

More.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And more.

 

And it feels like burning but it can’t be it because he has no oxygen left in his heavy breathing lungs to be any of it, Roy thinks as an indecent sound escapes from the other’s throat, who lowers to kiss him ferociously, like the brat he is.

 

 

 

Through their bond, Edward can feel the other climax’s approaching. Just like Roy realizes, in a far corner of what is left of his mind, that Edward is just as close, his thrusts running more erratic and needy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The young alchemist is shuddering, trying to slow down – he can’t..not yet – and he rubs Roy’s groin as temptingly as he can manage in his current state, before dedicating himself to make Roy lose it completely.

 

 

 

 

The grip is just perfect and ..

 

 

 

 

 

Edward just lowered down to leave a wet trial of licks on his skin, the wet sound harmonizing way too well with the slick of their movements.

 

 

 

Roy tries to push himself further, arching and shifting his pelvis just so. Edward urges to pin him to the bed and slows down even more and makes the movements’ rhythm of his thrusts and his hand match. Edward fucks him in a slow pace, rock hard and it is devastating.

 

 

 

 

 

 

If they cry out as they both come, neither of them would be able to say.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How much time they need to come back into their own skin, they couldn’t tell either.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What they can say is what they know.

 

 

 

 

Edward gently slides out of him but Roy doesn’t waste time and pushes him down on his back as he holds him close.

 

 

 

“Love ya”, he manages to breath, unlike Ed, who is still panting. “..you..mh..me-”

 

 

 

 

If Edward loses consciousness first, or Roy falls asleep before making sense, neither of them would be able to say.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“M-ning”

 

 

 

Edward mutters into the pillow, in response to the languid track of kisses left on his shoulder as soon as he started to wake up.

 

 

 

“Hi”

 

 

 

 

A sort of solid calm found his way through Roy. Edward sights, blissed by the feeling, relieved to sense Roy again. Well, more than that, actually.

 

 

 

 

 

And last night was-

 

 

 

 

“Fantastic” Roy answers him.

 

 

 

 

 

‘You are’, Edward thinks, slowly massaging his lover’s belly.

 

 

 

 

Roy slides closer and brushes away his sleepiness with a rapid kiss, before getting up.

 

 

 

How long has he been awake?

 

 

 

 

“A while”, Roy answers him, while dressing. He can’t help a smirk as he does so. “I don’t know what to think about it..I should be worried?”

 

“I don’t think so, the bond…it feels more..solid. To me. More structured.”

 

 

 

“I agree. It’s nice.” Another caste kiss against his lips. It really is.

 

 

 

Edward imitates him while Roy preceeds him downstairs to start the coffee.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"What do you want to do?", he asks entering the kitchen.

 

 

 

He means about everything. Haruko. His aunt. Henry.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And it doesn’t matter what Roy decides, he trusts him to do the right thing.

 

 

 

 

“Thank you, Ed” Roy murmurs fondly, easily reading the rail of his considerations.

 

Roy makes him wait, serves him the well-deserved cup of coffee and they sit down.

 

 

 

 

"You are going to like it".

 

 

 

 

 

A fond smile finds his way on Ed’s lips as he takes a sip of coffee.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Try me."

 

 

 


End file.
